Is it possible that I am being considered as a good mom??
Is it?
Well,yes. Wanna know why? I've been officially asked to be on my son's daycare's parent advisory council.
Okay, I know that to some people this isn't the biggest deal in the world. I know that there will be many PTA's I can join, many Parent-teacher interviews to attend and manky school trips I can chaperone. But, for now, I am relishing in this.
I don't exactly know what this involves. Nor do I really know what I have committed to. I do know that lately I'm feeling a lot more confident in my parenting skills. Like, at drop off and pick up I've been chatting to parents. And, sometimes I'm asked for advice - things like how do I get Matt to cooperate at drop off and how am I encouraging his speech.
Huh?
A couple years ago people were acting like I was crazy because I didn't own all of the baby einstein dvd's.
And now this - the request to be on parent council.
I know one of my friends is on her parent council. But, this is Ginny. And, she's super mom. She can talk about all the parenting books. She's the person I ask when I don't know what something means. She's the person I will call when I need to know what the best toy on the market is.
So, this is a big deal to me.
And, I'm looking forward to it.
Tomorrow night I shall advise away.
And in other Matty news ...
Today was a pretty big day. First Matt used the daycare potty twice. He's started telling us when he needs to pee - and announcing when he's going to poop.
He also went to visit the preschool room for the afternoon. He loves his teacher Kayla. Actually, so do I. She's really friendly, and not as crazy as his current teacher. When I went to his classroom to pick him up today I looked around and realized that the new toddlers (18 months) just looked like babies compared to my preschool boy. And, the best part is, I'm happy about all of this.
I'm not mourning his growing up. I'm realizing that every day I fall more in love with this kid.
Monday, September 18, 2006
Saturday, September 16, 2006
My Friend the Comedienne!
Last night Mike and I went to Seconnd City. It was a pretty big deal for us on several levels.
The first was that it was a night out. Matthew had a sleepover with his cousin (and yes, they did sleep). The second was that we'd never been to Second City (I know) and the third was that my friend Stef was on the Second City Mainstage. Even as someone who had never been before I knew this was a big deal. So we went.
I am so proud.
Let me tell you about Stef.
I've known her for about 5 years. I met her when I was working at a film company. She was a temp receptionist and I was an admin assistant. The very first thing I remember about her is that she brought this ridiculous fish lunch bag and walked in still wearing a bike helmet over her curly red hair.
I was kind of intrigued and kind of frightened.
Within a day I realized that she is one of the most amazing people I will ever meet.
Stef is an actor and a singer. And she's incredible.
And, despite the frustrations of being a struggling actor in Toronto she hasn't given up. She goes to auditions all the time. Sometimes she lands stuff, often she doesn't. But, the point is that she is working and trying and most of all acting.
And, last night was a pretty big deal - since her comedy troupe was at Second City.
And ... they were good. In fact - they were amazing!
Truthfully, the reason I haven't been to Second city before is because I don't really enjoy comedy. Most of the time I don't get it, and I really hate people who say funny things they know are funny in order to make people laugh.
I'm more of a person who is impressed by off the cuff funny. You know, like sometimes people just say things that are so hilarious you laugh all of the time. I digress here. My point is that, despite my feelings on comedy I LOVED THIS.
Because it was good.
In fact it was amazing. Stef even sang a song about terrorists. Seriously.
And, at the end of it all I am one proud friend.
Why? Because after forever she's still doing what she loves, and no matter the set backs, she keeps trying. And getting places and doing amazingly well. And, I'm so proud to say she's my friend. (did you know she was in Mean Girls too? She was - with Lo Lo - and when we go shopping people always recognize her - also very cool.)
But, aside from all of this, the thing that keeps me hanging out with her is that she's also an amazing person and friend.
She once told me that in life you have a friends pyramid. There are the ones at the top that are the most important and then the wealth is spread down. And, she said to me "you know you're at the top of my pyramid."
Is it true? I don't know. But I feel that way - as do all of her friends.
Because she cares. Despite the fact that she's the busiest person I know (really, I almost have to call her agent if I want to meet for lunch - and yes, she really does have 2 agents and I know all about them!) she always makes the time to know about the silly details of my life.
She's one of the only friends who is allowed to join me when I go to see my hairstylist, Bill (he loves her) because she gets the Bill experience. Yes, of course I must wear my best outfit, yes you must tell me that I look thin and rich before I go in, yes I will discuss every detail of everything he said to me.
She also just seems to get things. When I had Matt and just was fat and ugly for months she bought me clothes that flattered me. She always makes me feel like the fact that I'm a mom is the cooles thing ever. And, when you're 25 when you have a baby, not too many of your friends say that.
And, at the end of the day she makes me laugh. When we were working at a crappy admin job we got nicknamed Lucy and Ethel after flooding our office because we put dish soap in the dishwasher. If I'm pissed off at someone (we worked with a crazy accountant) she can get me giggling. I think all of this comedy and improv is perfect. Because she will rock it.
Like she rocks everything else.
I think she knows how much I think of her, but now you guys do too.
Yes - we are wearing matching sweaters. We thought it was cool that was had the same item of clothing (different cut, same old Navy sales rack) so we decided to go out in matching outfits. We ordered the infamous Fat Plate at Pickle Barrel - also known as their appetizer sampler.
The first was that it was a night out. Matthew had a sleepover with his cousin (and yes, they did sleep). The second was that we'd never been to Second City (I know) and the third was that my friend Stef was on the Second City Mainstage. Even as someone who had never been before I knew this was a big deal. So we went.
I am so proud.
Let me tell you about Stef.
I've known her for about 5 years. I met her when I was working at a film company. She was a temp receptionist and I was an admin assistant. The very first thing I remember about her is that she brought this ridiculous fish lunch bag and walked in still wearing a bike helmet over her curly red hair.
I was kind of intrigued and kind of frightened.
Within a day I realized that she is one of the most amazing people I will ever meet.
Stef is an actor and a singer. And she's incredible.
And, despite the frustrations of being a struggling actor in Toronto she hasn't given up. She goes to auditions all the time. Sometimes she lands stuff, often she doesn't. But, the point is that she is working and trying and most of all acting.
And, last night was a pretty big deal - since her comedy troupe was at Second City.
And ... they were good. In fact - they were amazing!
Truthfully, the reason I haven't been to Second city before is because I don't really enjoy comedy. Most of the time I don't get it, and I really hate people who say funny things they know are funny in order to make people laugh.
I'm more of a person who is impressed by off the cuff funny. You know, like sometimes people just say things that are so hilarious you laugh all of the time. I digress here. My point is that, despite my feelings on comedy I LOVED THIS.
Because it was good.
In fact it was amazing. Stef even sang a song about terrorists. Seriously.
And, at the end of it all I am one proud friend.
Why? Because after forever she's still doing what she loves, and no matter the set backs, she keeps trying. And getting places and doing amazingly well. And, I'm so proud to say she's my friend. (did you know she was in Mean Girls too? She was - with Lo Lo - and when we go shopping people always recognize her - also very cool.)
But, aside from all of this, the thing that keeps me hanging out with her is that she's also an amazing person and friend.
She once told me that in life you have a friends pyramid. There are the ones at the top that are the most important and then the wealth is spread down. And, she said to me "you know you're at the top of my pyramid."
Is it true? I don't know. But I feel that way - as do all of her friends.
Because she cares. Despite the fact that she's the busiest person I know (really, I almost have to call her agent if I want to meet for lunch - and yes, she really does have 2 agents and I know all about them!) she always makes the time to know about the silly details of my life.
She's one of the only friends who is allowed to join me when I go to see my hairstylist, Bill (he loves her) because she gets the Bill experience. Yes, of course I must wear my best outfit, yes you must tell me that I look thin and rich before I go in, yes I will discuss every detail of everything he said to me.
She also just seems to get things. When I had Matt and just was fat and ugly for months she bought me clothes that flattered me. She always makes me feel like the fact that I'm a mom is the cooles thing ever. And, when you're 25 when you have a baby, not too many of your friends say that.
And, at the end of the day she makes me laugh. When we were working at a crappy admin job we got nicknamed Lucy and Ethel after flooding our office because we put dish soap in the dishwasher. If I'm pissed off at someone (we worked with a crazy accountant) she can get me giggling. I think all of this comedy and improv is perfect. Because she will rock it.
Like she rocks everything else.
I think she knows how much I think of her, but now you guys do too.
Yes - we are wearing matching sweaters. We thought it was cool that was had the same item of clothing (different cut, same old Navy sales rack) so we decided to go out in matching outfits. We ordered the infamous Fat Plate at Pickle Barrel - also known as their appetizer sampler.
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Hello to the Peeps!
The other day I got an instant message from Mike. He was very excited to tell me about someone who read my blog.
I tried guessing to no avail.
And finally he told me. His ex-girlfriend from highschool reads my blog - on a regular basis (Hi Melissa!)
First of all, yes, I'm totally okay with the fact that he is friends with her. We're talking high school romance, and I'm friends with a highschool boyfriend. This is not my point.
My point is, this is pretty cool.
I write my blog because I like to write. I really do. It's an outlet for me and it's a space for me to write about what is going on in my life. Motherhood has been a pretty frightening journey for me, and one that I'm only beginning to navigate. Combine that with the drama that is my every day life and I'm one explosively emotional being!
And it's super cool to know that people actually are reading about my life - and care.
The comments I love. I love them especially when the comments are from people I don't know outside of the "blogosphere". I can't even tell you how incredibly important and special and, well, let's be honest COOL I felt when one of my favourite writers (and bloggers) first commented on my blog. I think I told everyone I knew - and some people I barely knew were told to check out the comments because I was so excited.
And, it's also pretty neat to know friends are reading. I know this sounds corny and cheesy and everything else, but when someone tells me that they read something on my blog it's important to me. Or when they take the time to mention something I've said, or comment on something that has upset me or pissed me off or just generally got me thinking (i.e. whether I want another baby) it's appreciated. Because, honestly, at the end of the day sometimes it's easier to write out what you are thinking than to hunt down a friend to listen.
So to all of you out there - this is a great big thank you and a great big hug. Thanks for keeping me going, keeping me smiling and caring about my little corner of the universe.
And one more thing .... comment comment comment. Please!
I tried guessing to no avail.
And finally he told me. His ex-girlfriend from highschool reads my blog - on a regular basis (Hi Melissa!)
First of all, yes, I'm totally okay with the fact that he is friends with her. We're talking high school romance, and I'm friends with a highschool boyfriend. This is not my point.
My point is, this is pretty cool.
I write my blog because I like to write. I really do. It's an outlet for me and it's a space for me to write about what is going on in my life. Motherhood has been a pretty frightening journey for me, and one that I'm only beginning to navigate. Combine that with the drama that is my every day life and I'm one explosively emotional being!
And it's super cool to know that people actually are reading about my life - and care.
The comments I love. I love them especially when the comments are from people I don't know outside of the "blogosphere". I can't even tell you how incredibly important and special and, well, let's be honest COOL I felt when one of my favourite writers (and bloggers) first commented on my blog. I think I told everyone I knew - and some people I barely knew were told to check out the comments because I was so excited.
And, it's also pretty neat to know friends are reading. I know this sounds corny and cheesy and everything else, but when someone tells me that they read something on my blog it's important to me. Or when they take the time to mention something I've said, or comment on something that has upset me or pissed me off or just generally got me thinking (i.e. whether I want another baby) it's appreciated. Because, honestly, at the end of the day sometimes it's easier to write out what you are thinking than to hunt down a friend to listen.
So to all of you out there - this is a great big thank you and a great big hug. Thanks for keeping me going, keeping me smiling and caring about my little corner of the universe.
And one more thing .... comment comment comment. Please!
Wide Awake
I don't know what it is about fall, but lately my sleep is totally off. Take today for instance. In the back of my mind I knew I had to get up early. I promised one of my colleagues I would help her set up for an event, which means being downtown for 7am. No biggie, usually. I set my alarm a few minutes early and went to bed.
The only problem was that at 3:30 I was wide awake and raring to go. I finally got out of bed at 4. It's ridiculous. I decided to tweeze my eyebrows because what else do you do at 4am? I also had an extra cup of coffee and watched all of the different news programs.
Who knew how much news is on before 5:30.
Interesting.
And, on the topic of being awake so early it makes me wonder what exactly consists of late and early. For instance, the early early show that I was watching ran from 4-5. But, what time does the late late show end? It's completely possible that people, friends even, were going to bed when I was waking up.
Hmmm ...
Okay - well, it's now almost 6 and I need to get ready. Because despite my early start I'm still not dressed and ready to go.
Oh - and on a completely different topic.
I GOT NEW JEANS!
I'm very excited about this. I've been a little obsessed about jeans lately. It seems that everywhere everyone keeps talking about skinny jeans. Trust me - they look awful on me. But, still needed new jeans.
So, we were at the mall last night and I went to the Gap. I found the coolest jeans. They are kind of low rise, but not too low rise. And, the waistband is embellished with studs (sounds tacky, but it's not). Anyway, I was looking for my size and they didn't have it. So, I thought that I'd get the size down and try them on. I figured that if they weren't too horribly tight I would buy them to shrink into.
Except, wonder of wonders, they fit. Perfectly.
They could have been the ugliest jeans ever, and I think I would have bought them because they fit me and I liked the size. And, I ran down the aisle of the fitting room and showed Mike who kind of knew there was no saying no to these jeans.
Is it possible to be in LOVE with jeans??? Cause I am. I debated saying screw the dress code at work and wearing them today, but really, no. Not such a good idea. But, I'm so wearing them on friday. Because we can wear jeans on Friday (ha ha my legal department friends who cannot wear jeans. Ha ha I say). And we are going to Second City in the evening and I can also wear jeans there. I think.
So excited.
The only problem was that at 3:30 I was wide awake and raring to go. I finally got out of bed at 4. It's ridiculous. I decided to tweeze my eyebrows because what else do you do at 4am? I also had an extra cup of coffee and watched all of the different news programs.
Who knew how much news is on before 5:30.
Interesting.
And, on the topic of being awake so early it makes me wonder what exactly consists of late and early. For instance, the early early show that I was watching ran from 4-5. But, what time does the late late show end? It's completely possible that people, friends even, were going to bed when I was waking up.
Hmmm ...
Okay - well, it's now almost 6 and I need to get ready. Because despite my early start I'm still not dressed and ready to go.
Oh - and on a completely different topic.
I GOT NEW JEANS!
I'm very excited about this. I've been a little obsessed about jeans lately. It seems that everywhere everyone keeps talking about skinny jeans. Trust me - they look awful on me. But, still needed new jeans.
So, we were at the mall last night and I went to the Gap. I found the coolest jeans. They are kind of low rise, but not too low rise. And, the waistband is embellished with studs (sounds tacky, but it's not). Anyway, I was looking for my size and they didn't have it. So, I thought that I'd get the size down and try them on. I figured that if they weren't too horribly tight I would buy them to shrink into.
Except, wonder of wonders, they fit. Perfectly.
They could have been the ugliest jeans ever, and I think I would have bought them because they fit me and I liked the size. And, I ran down the aisle of the fitting room and showed Mike who kind of knew there was no saying no to these jeans.
Is it possible to be in LOVE with jeans??? Cause I am. I debated saying screw the dress code at work and wearing them today, but really, no. Not such a good idea. But, I'm so wearing them on friday. Because we can wear jeans on Friday (ha ha my legal department friends who cannot wear jeans. Ha ha I say). And we are going to Second City in the evening and I can also wear jeans there. I think.
So excited.
Sunday, September 10, 2006
Mommy cracked
I knew one day this would happen.
I finally cracked!
Okay, well maybe not exactly, but ...
Yesterday was a weird day. We didn't quite knw if it was rainy or sunny so we didn't quite know what to do with the day. We checked out the Cabbageton festival which was fun. And then we decided to go to McDonald's for lunch because Mike wanted a big mac and Matt wanted to go to a playground. Since it looked like rain we thought the indoor playground would be perfect.
Apparently so did 5 million other parents.
We had lunch and then Matt went to play. (I went with him).
He's only 2 - and the age range is 3-10. But, I figure he is fine because he's a pretty aggressive toddler and he can hold his own with 3 and 4 year olds.
Things were okay at first, but then some of the older kids got a little aggressive. Matty still held his own, climbing through the tunnels. Though I wanted to leave Mike said no, he was fine, let him play. And I did. For several minutes.
But, I started stressing when one of the kids (I'd say he was like 8 maybe) started to climb the play structure from the outside. I kind of wondered where his parents were. This is a pretty restrained McDonald's, and usually the parents are all over their kids.
Apparently this wasn't the case with destructo child.
All the kids were kind of avoiding him.
And then he found Matt who was climbing into the tunnel.
Matt wanted to take his time, this kid wanted to get in the tunnel.
Matt said no.
The kid tried to push him.
Matt pushed back - Hard - and knocked the kid over a bit.
So the kid says "move".
Matt said no and sat down.
So the kid stepped on his foot and when Matt started to cry he pushed him and went up the slide.
All this happened while I was en route from my seat to the base of the climbing structure. I freaked out, said "hey" grabbed Matt and left the room.
Truthfully, I almost lost it. Which is why I left (thank God Mike grabbed Matt's shoes and jacket). I was almost the mommy who freaked out and shouted at someone else's child. I mean he was pushing a little kid. seriously.
Mike thought it was kind of funny because I did turn into crazy mom there for a minute. And, I did carry my screaming toddler through McDonald's. It was a bit of a scene.
Oh well. Funny. At least I didn't scream at the other kid.
And, as Mike pointed out, thank goodness Matt can hold his own.
I finally cracked!
Okay, well maybe not exactly, but ...
Yesterday was a weird day. We didn't quite knw if it was rainy or sunny so we didn't quite know what to do with the day. We checked out the Cabbageton festival which was fun. And then we decided to go to McDonald's for lunch because Mike wanted a big mac and Matt wanted to go to a playground. Since it looked like rain we thought the indoor playground would be perfect.
Apparently so did 5 million other parents.
We had lunch and then Matt went to play. (I went with him).
He's only 2 - and the age range is 3-10. But, I figure he is fine because he's a pretty aggressive toddler and he can hold his own with 3 and 4 year olds.
Things were okay at first, but then some of the older kids got a little aggressive. Matty still held his own, climbing through the tunnels. Though I wanted to leave Mike said no, he was fine, let him play. And I did. For several minutes.
But, I started stressing when one of the kids (I'd say he was like 8 maybe) started to climb the play structure from the outside. I kind of wondered where his parents were. This is a pretty restrained McDonald's, and usually the parents are all over their kids.
Apparently this wasn't the case with destructo child.
All the kids were kind of avoiding him.
And then he found Matt who was climbing into the tunnel.
Matt wanted to take his time, this kid wanted to get in the tunnel.
Matt said no.
The kid tried to push him.
Matt pushed back - Hard - and knocked the kid over a bit.
So the kid says "move".
Matt said no and sat down.
So the kid stepped on his foot and when Matt started to cry he pushed him and went up the slide.
All this happened while I was en route from my seat to the base of the climbing structure. I freaked out, said "hey" grabbed Matt and left the room.
Truthfully, I almost lost it. Which is why I left (thank God Mike grabbed Matt's shoes and jacket). I was almost the mommy who freaked out and shouted at someone else's child. I mean he was pushing a little kid. seriously.
Mike thought it was kind of funny because I did turn into crazy mom there for a minute. And, I did carry my screaming toddler through McDonald's. It was a bit of a scene.
Oh well. Funny. At least I didn't scream at the other kid.
And, as Mike pointed out, thank goodness Matt can hold his own.
Saturday, September 09, 2006
Back on the Wagon
So of course this week was Labour day, and with it came a sort of resolution.
I was reading something about how a lot of people actually make second resultions on Labour day. Like on New Year's except in the fall. I rarely make New Year's resolutions, and when I do I never keep them, so kind of dumb to find a second time in the year for me to make a resolution that I know I won't keep.
But, this feeling of fall, new beginnings, and reading about skinny jeans did get me back on the bandwagon when it came to my weight.
For the past month I've been avoiding all of my weight watchers stuff. I wasn't sticking to my weekly weigh ins, I wasn't journaling, I wasn't really even counting points. So, basically I was off track. I was still trying in the sense that I wasn't really gaining weight, I wasn't over eating, etc. In other words I was at a standstill.
But, I got back on track.
On Labour Day (after a week of trying) I weighed myself and guess what?! I finally hit 25 pounds. It's cool, but also a little sad since in July I was at 23.5 pounds. But, I guess for me it was that thing that pushed me towards realizing that I could soon hit 30 pounds. And after 30 pounds what's another 20 - y'know. And, so I started again.
Mid week my friend pointed out that if I really work I could hit my goal weight at Christmas. She's right. What a great Christmas gift to myself not to mention all the lovely Christmas gifts others could give me.
And then I weighed myself again today (I know it should be weekly, but I did go Monday to Saturday, so whatever) and again the WW magic is working because I'm dropping pounds. And with those pounds is coming confidence. Again. Finally.
I've promised myself that when I hit a certain magic number (45 pounds) I will by the Lululemon pants I really want.
When I hit 30 pounds (which I am close to) I get to see my beloved Bill the hairstylist. Hmmm ... I think I should book an appointment.
And, oh yeah, I'm down to the next level of points. This kind of sucks because it means I get to eat less calories in the day. But then it's also good becasue it means that I am losing weight. And how great is that???????
So, today I'm just being proud of myself. Because liking myself is always a good thing.
I was reading something about how a lot of people actually make second resultions on Labour day. Like on New Year's except in the fall. I rarely make New Year's resolutions, and when I do I never keep them, so kind of dumb to find a second time in the year for me to make a resolution that I know I won't keep.
But, this feeling of fall, new beginnings, and reading about skinny jeans did get me back on the bandwagon when it came to my weight.
For the past month I've been avoiding all of my weight watchers stuff. I wasn't sticking to my weekly weigh ins, I wasn't journaling, I wasn't really even counting points. So, basically I was off track. I was still trying in the sense that I wasn't really gaining weight, I wasn't over eating, etc. In other words I was at a standstill.
But, I got back on track.
On Labour Day (after a week of trying) I weighed myself and guess what?! I finally hit 25 pounds. It's cool, but also a little sad since in July I was at 23.5 pounds. But, I guess for me it was that thing that pushed me towards realizing that I could soon hit 30 pounds. And after 30 pounds what's another 20 - y'know. And, so I started again.
Mid week my friend pointed out that if I really work I could hit my goal weight at Christmas. She's right. What a great Christmas gift to myself not to mention all the lovely Christmas gifts others could give me.
And then I weighed myself again today (I know it should be weekly, but I did go Monday to Saturday, so whatever) and again the WW magic is working because I'm dropping pounds. And with those pounds is coming confidence. Again. Finally.
I've promised myself that when I hit a certain magic number (45 pounds) I will by the Lululemon pants I really want.
When I hit 30 pounds (which I am close to) I get to see my beloved Bill the hairstylist. Hmmm ... I think I should book an appointment.
And, oh yeah, I'm down to the next level of points. This kind of sucks because it means I get to eat less calories in the day. But then it's also good becasue it means that I am losing weight. And how great is that???????
So, today I'm just being proud of myself. Because liking myself is always a good thing.
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
The Monsters ...
Matthew is afraid of monsters.
I don't know why. His fear seemed to come out of nowhere. Okay, so we did let him watch Monsters Inc., but really he was already afraid of monsters when we let him watch it, and we sort of figured that it would show him not to be afraid of monsters.
Apparently that didn't work because the kid is terrified.
Yesterday, for instance, we were watching the Simpsons. I know - maybe not the best show for a toddler, but we were tired and I couldn't watch Dora again. (God help me when Mike starts quoting lines from Dora and we both laugh).
And, it was a good one. Except right in the middle of the show they make a commercial with a monster climbing in an old woman's window.
Matthew started screaming and clinging to me "Ahhhh!!! Mommy. Monster!"
Oops.
And, given that it was not a kids show, and the purpose of the show was not to show that Monsters really are nice not mean, we kind of just had to go back to Dora and try not to dwell on that monster.
He didn't mention it again. He went to bed, all was fine. Till about 3:30 am when he ran down that hall shrieking "momma momma - monsters."
Oh dear.
Half an hour later he was back asleep, cuddled up with me (and later peeing on me - thanks Matt!).
Poor thing.
I don't know why. His fear seemed to come out of nowhere. Okay, so we did let him watch Monsters Inc., but really he was already afraid of monsters when we let him watch it, and we sort of figured that it would show him not to be afraid of monsters.
Apparently that didn't work because the kid is terrified.
Yesterday, for instance, we were watching the Simpsons. I know - maybe not the best show for a toddler, but we were tired and I couldn't watch Dora again. (God help me when Mike starts quoting lines from Dora and we both laugh).
And, it was a good one. Except right in the middle of the show they make a commercial with a monster climbing in an old woman's window.
Matthew started screaming and clinging to me "Ahhhh!!! Mommy. Monster!"
Oops.
And, given that it was not a kids show, and the purpose of the show was not to show that Monsters really are nice not mean, we kind of just had to go back to Dora and try not to dwell on that monster.
He didn't mention it again. He went to bed, all was fine. Till about 3:30 am when he ran down that hall shrieking "momma momma - monsters."
Oh dear.
Half an hour later he was back asleep, cuddled up with me (and later peeing on me - thanks Matt!).
Poor thing.
Sunday, September 03, 2006
Baby # 2 ... hmmmm
NO. I'm not pregnant. There is no baby #2. You can breathe again!
But, it seems that since my child has hit the magical age of 2 everyone thinks that a second child is imminent. It started with my doctor who happens to be Matthew's doctor too.
"Now that your son is two ... have you started thinking about another?" Nope.
Then it just snowballed. We had an open house for his 2nd birthday and I sware people were looking to see if I had a bump. Nope.
The questions keep coming - parents in the park, people I work with, somewhat random strangers on the street and friends of friends and distant relatives.
For the record, I don't think that a mandatory age difference is 2 years. It's nice, I agree, but so is 3 years or 5 years.
But then today Mike and I were out at a mall shopping while Matty spent some time with his grandparents. We were on a mission to find fall clothes for Matt. We were in Walmart and ended up in the baby department. And Mike turned to me and said
"I hope our next one is a girl"
WHAT?????
What next one? Trust me - I am 100% sure I am not pregnant, and we are not trying to get pregnant. So the comment was pretty random.
So I calmly said "are you trying to tell me you're ready for another one?"
Yep. It turned out he was. It turns out he's been ready for awhile and just didn't tell me. Good call on that. Since I am nowhere near ready to even think about another one.
And it shocked me that Mike is.
So, herewith all the reasons that I am not ready for another.
1) I am finally beginning to get comfortable with my body after 3 long years. Today I weighed myself and I hit that magical 25 pound mark. I have a ways to go. But, I'm seeing the results and I'm liking them. And I want to lose more and like myself again before I have another baby.
2) I love the stage Matthew is at. We chat. We talk. He communicates. He sleeps through the night. He walks and doens't need a stroller all the time. When I am sad he actually tries to comfort me. It's taken 2 years and 3 months (plus 10 months of pregnancy) to get to this stage. I don't really want to start over.
3) Pregnancy. Yuck.
4) Labour. Ouch.
5) Post Partum Depression. Terrified.
6) I would be giving up the last 2 years of my twenties. The way I see it, I got pregnant 5 years before I was planning to. I wasn't quite ready to give up eveyrthing I did. I don't regret it, but I also know that I want to finish my twenties before I get pregnant again.
7) I want to give another child the same love and attention I gave to Matt and at this point I can't. At least I don't think I can.
8) I don't want to live in Toronto in a small condo with 2 kids. I don't want to take 2 kids home from daycare everyday on the TTC. One almost kills me somedays. I think If I attempted to put a double stroller on the Eglinton bus at rush hours someone really would kill me. Ditto for a regular stroller and a hyper toddler.
9) I'm already tired enough. Thinking about working, then picking Matt up at daycare and taking him home on the bus while pregnant - I may kill myself.
10) We don't have enough money. There is no way we can afford to have 2 kids in daycare right now. Nor can we afford all of the other stuff that comes along with 2 kids - clothes, shoes, diapers, food, formula.
I know I know. That list sounds really selfish. It is, in fact, really selfish. But I think in a decision like this you have to be a little selfish, because if you aren't than you will make all the wrong decisions, right?
I dunno. Feel free to comment - I'd love to hear what others think.
PS why is there a random pic of me here? I dunno. Just cause - really because Mike and I agreed it's a nice picture and I hate pictures of me :)
But, it seems that since my child has hit the magical age of 2 everyone thinks that a second child is imminent. It started with my doctor who happens to be Matthew's doctor too.
"Now that your son is two ... have you started thinking about another?" Nope.
Then it just snowballed. We had an open house for his 2nd birthday and I sware people were looking to see if I had a bump. Nope.
The questions keep coming - parents in the park, people I work with, somewhat random strangers on the street and friends of friends and distant relatives.
For the record, I don't think that a mandatory age difference is 2 years. It's nice, I agree, but so is 3 years or 5 years.
But then today Mike and I were out at a mall shopping while Matty spent some time with his grandparents. We were on a mission to find fall clothes for Matt. We were in Walmart and ended up in the baby department. And Mike turned to me and said
"I hope our next one is a girl"
WHAT?????
What next one? Trust me - I am 100% sure I am not pregnant, and we are not trying to get pregnant. So the comment was pretty random.
So I calmly said "are you trying to tell me you're ready for another one?"
Yep. It turned out he was. It turns out he's been ready for awhile and just didn't tell me. Good call on that. Since I am nowhere near ready to even think about another one.
And it shocked me that Mike is.
So, herewith all the reasons that I am not ready for another.
1) I am finally beginning to get comfortable with my body after 3 long years. Today I weighed myself and I hit that magical 25 pound mark. I have a ways to go. But, I'm seeing the results and I'm liking them. And I want to lose more and like myself again before I have another baby.
2) I love the stage Matthew is at. We chat. We talk. He communicates. He sleeps through the night. He walks and doens't need a stroller all the time. When I am sad he actually tries to comfort me. It's taken 2 years and 3 months (plus 10 months of pregnancy) to get to this stage. I don't really want to start over.
3) Pregnancy. Yuck.
4) Labour. Ouch.
5) Post Partum Depression. Terrified.
6) I would be giving up the last 2 years of my twenties. The way I see it, I got pregnant 5 years before I was planning to. I wasn't quite ready to give up eveyrthing I did. I don't regret it, but I also know that I want to finish my twenties before I get pregnant again.
7) I want to give another child the same love and attention I gave to Matt and at this point I can't. At least I don't think I can.
8) I don't want to live in Toronto in a small condo with 2 kids. I don't want to take 2 kids home from daycare everyday on the TTC. One almost kills me somedays. I think If I attempted to put a double stroller on the Eglinton bus at rush hours someone really would kill me. Ditto for a regular stroller and a hyper toddler.
9) I'm already tired enough. Thinking about working, then picking Matt up at daycare and taking him home on the bus while pregnant - I may kill myself.
10) We don't have enough money. There is no way we can afford to have 2 kids in daycare right now. Nor can we afford all of the other stuff that comes along with 2 kids - clothes, shoes, diapers, food, formula.
I know I know. That list sounds really selfish. It is, in fact, really selfish. But I think in a decision like this you have to be a little selfish, because if you aren't than you will make all the wrong decisions, right?
I dunno. Feel free to comment - I'd love to hear what others think.
PS why is there a random pic of me here? I dunno. Just cause - really because Mike and I agreed it's a nice picture and I hate pictures of me :)
Saturday, September 02, 2006
Matt's First Crush & a Shout Out to My Sis
Sometimes people tell you really cool things - that make you feel really special. Tonight over cake for my dad's birthday my sister told me that she goes online every night to read my blog.
Lately life has been overwhelming. And, knowing someone who loves you cares enough to tune into your life every day. Well, that's just cool. Period.
And, Beck, someday I'll teach you how to comment :)
Now on to Matt's first crush.
One of my closest friends lives down the hall from me. Yep. I'm lucky. I know. And, I've said a million times how if Ginny hadn't been here in Matt's first year, well ... I don't know. It would have sucked for sure. And, the reason I got to know Ginny is pretty much because her younger daughter, Lindsey, is 4 days older than Matt. Her older daughter, Mackenzie, will be 4 in October.
And Matt has a big crush on Mackenzie.
At first I thought he just said her name a lot because it was close to his. We call Matt Matty and they call Mackenzie Mackie. So, I just thought he was saying Mackie cause he liked it. Well, Mackie is now "Kenzie" in his world, and he is enamored.
At the tender age of 2 he is already knocking on her door and talking about her constantly. I have to say, it's the cutest thing. Like, on the bus on Friday he started to sing - at the top of his lungs. What was he singing "Kenzie. Kenzie. I LUV Kenzie." over and over and over.
And, every day we go to the garbage chute - which happens to be across the hall from their unit. He always tries to run over and open the door. I usually manage to stop him. And he always tells me "that's where Kenzie lives." Yep. I know! I really do.
How long will this last? I don't know. A little birdie has told me that Mackenzie does ask about Matt too. Too sweet. Sadly, Mac is going to jr. kindergarten this year. Will there be an older man in her future.
Hello! who cares. Matt is 2. He'll get over it. But, let's be serious here for a second. As in-laws go ... well, let's just say that he would have pretty cool ones!!!
Lately life has been overwhelming. And, knowing someone who loves you cares enough to tune into your life every day. Well, that's just cool. Period.
And, Beck, someday I'll teach you how to comment :)
Now on to Matt's first crush.
One of my closest friends lives down the hall from me. Yep. I'm lucky. I know. And, I've said a million times how if Ginny hadn't been here in Matt's first year, well ... I don't know. It would have sucked for sure. And, the reason I got to know Ginny is pretty much because her younger daughter, Lindsey, is 4 days older than Matt. Her older daughter, Mackenzie, will be 4 in October.
And Matt has a big crush on Mackenzie.
At first I thought he just said her name a lot because it was close to his. We call Matt Matty and they call Mackenzie Mackie. So, I just thought he was saying Mackie cause he liked it. Well, Mackie is now "Kenzie" in his world, and he is enamored.
At the tender age of 2 he is already knocking on her door and talking about her constantly. I have to say, it's the cutest thing. Like, on the bus on Friday he started to sing - at the top of his lungs. What was he singing "Kenzie. Kenzie. I LUV Kenzie." over and over and over.
And, every day we go to the garbage chute - which happens to be across the hall from their unit. He always tries to run over and open the door. I usually manage to stop him. And he always tells me "that's where Kenzie lives." Yep. I know! I really do.
How long will this last? I don't know. A little birdie has told me that Mackenzie does ask about Matt too. Too sweet. Sadly, Mac is going to jr. kindergarten this year. Will there be an older man in her future.
Hello! who cares. Matt is 2. He'll get over it. But, let's be serious here for a second. As in-laws go ... well, let's just say that he would have pretty cool ones!!!
Friday, September 01, 2006
The Park Mommies
I have discovered I have a love/hate relationship with other park mommies.
There are things I love. This includes the fact that they bring their children who happen to entertain my child. Since we go to the playground right outside the daycare, I know some of the parents and kids. This is nice. I like the camraderie. I like that the kids share their respective snacks (I am learning to bring candy or cereal not an apple which turns into the communal apple).
But then there are the things that I hate.
Like the bitchy moms - the ones that are too cool for their own good and who scoff at your child's outfit. Yes, I know that my son had on flourescent green girls' corderoy overalls in a size too small with a horrible blue and yellow striped hoody tank top on the other day. Do I look like someone who would dress her kid that way. NO! It's daycare clothes. He is toilet training. No comments needed.
I also hate the moms who bring 25 toys for their own child and then get mad when your toddler tries to play with them. Seriously, share toys or don't spread them out. That's stupid. And, cheap, and your kid needs to learn to share!!!
But despite the love/hate thing, I'm beginning to get into it just a little bit. The social thing is a pretty big deal. I like being friends with the other moms. I like that the cool, pink haired kind of renegade mom who is really up on her politics chooses me to chat with over the other moms who drool with envy at her coolness. I think it's because in addition to that "pshaw you wannabe popular moms out there" vibe that I send off (not) our kids get along.
I also have to admit that I am enjoying the gossip. I can't help it. I love gossip (I admit it I admit it) and mommy gossip can be infinitely more interesting than work gossip. I don't know why, but it is. I find it incredibly interesting and I feel that I further my son's social status by being in on the gossip. Sure he's only 2, but I do want him to get invited to the good birthday parties and have the fun friends. So really this is all for him.
So bring on the playgrounds ... I love them! (Thank god my child does too)
There are things I love. This includes the fact that they bring their children who happen to entertain my child. Since we go to the playground right outside the daycare, I know some of the parents and kids. This is nice. I like the camraderie. I like that the kids share their respective snacks (I am learning to bring candy or cereal not an apple which turns into the communal apple).
But then there are the things that I hate.
Like the bitchy moms - the ones that are too cool for their own good and who scoff at your child's outfit. Yes, I know that my son had on flourescent green girls' corderoy overalls in a size too small with a horrible blue and yellow striped hoody tank top on the other day. Do I look like someone who would dress her kid that way. NO! It's daycare clothes. He is toilet training. No comments needed.
I also hate the moms who bring 25 toys for their own child and then get mad when your toddler tries to play with them. Seriously, share toys or don't spread them out. That's stupid. And, cheap, and your kid needs to learn to share!!!
But despite the love/hate thing, I'm beginning to get into it just a little bit. The social thing is a pretty big deal. I like being friends with the other moms. I like that the cool, pink haired kind of renegade mom who is really up on her politics chooses me to chat with over the other moms who drool with envy at her coolness. I think it's because in addition to that "pshaw you wannabe popular moms out there" vibe that I send off (not) our kids get along.
I also have to admit that I am enjoying the gossip. I can't help it. I love gossip (I admit it I admit it) and mommy gossip can be infinitely more interesting than work gossip. I don't know why, but it is. I find it incredibly interesting and I feel that I further my son's social status by being in on the gossip. Sure he's only 2, but I do want him to get invited to the good birthday parties and have the fun friends. So really this is all for him.
So bring on the playgrounds ... I love them! (Thank god my child does too)
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
The Poo Post
I assume there comes a time in every mother's life when something happens that makes them physically sick.
I've been puked on, peed on, changed exploda-poo diapers. Yes they were gross, but I dealt with it.
But, now we have started that wonderful time in every toddler's life - TOILET TRAINING.
I have to admit, I'm not loving it. When our daycare administrator suggested that perhaps Matthew's fascination with the potty and his genitalia may be a sign that he is ready I told her that he may be ready, but I'm not.
And trust me. I'm not.
I watched my sister, queen of all moms, toilet train my niece. I saw the stress, the frustration and the grossness (and I got the phone calls - 'did you know that Kyla will only poop in the bath - is that weird?').
So, on the weekend we bought the pull ups, the underwear, everything, and we pulled out Matt's potty. Good times. He started peeing, and was pretty proud of himself. And every day I've been pulling the potty out, turning on treehouse and putting Matt on the potty as soon as he wakes up. This has gone quite well.
Till today - when he pooped!!!
Our potty (the Royal throne that plays music whenever the child pees/poos) started to sing, and Matt seemed done, so in I went to clean it up. But, Matt seemed over excited and was pointing. Perhaps it was a lot of pee.
Nope.
Our first ever poop in the potty!!!
I know this is a milestone. Fantastic. Way to go Matt.
But, it was unexpected, and quite honestly I gagged. I don't know why. I have no idea why this was so repulsive to me. But, it was gross.
Luckily Mike was home, and quickly disposed of it.
Oh the fun!
Our singing potty!
I've been puked on, peed on, changed exploda-poo diapers. Yes they were gross, but I dealt with it.
But, now we have started that wonderful time in every toddler's life - TOILET TRAINING.
I have to admit, I'm not loving it. When our daycare administrator suggested that perhaps Matthew's fascination with the potty and his genitalia may be a sign that he is ready I told her that he may be ready, but I'm not.
And trust me. I'm not.
I watched my sister, queen of all moms, toilet train my niece. I saw the stress, the frustration and the grossness (and I got the phone calls - 'did you know that Kyla will only poop in the bath - is that weird?').
So, on the weekend we bought the pull ups, the underwear, everything, and we pulled out Matt's potty. Good times. He started peeing, and was pretty proud of himself. And every day I've been pulling the potty out, turning on treehouse and putting Matt on the potty as soon as he wakes up. This has gone quite well.
Till today - when he pooped!!!
Our potty (the Royal throne that plays music whenever the child pees/poos) started to sing, and Matt seemed done, so in I went to clean it up. But, Matt seemed over excited and was pointing. Perhaps it was a lot of pee.
Nope.
Our first ever poop in the potty!!!
I know this is a milestone. Fantastic. Way to go Matt.
But, it was unexpected, and quite honestly I gagged. I don't know why. I have no idea why this was so repulsive to me. But, it was gross.
Luckily Mike was home, and quickly disposed of it.
Oh the fun!
Our singing potty!
Monday, August 28, 2006
My Ever changing Toddler
Matthew has changed a lot lately.
I don't know what has happened, what we have done, or really the reason, but it seems like Matty has changed a lot lately.
The little being who I didn't quite comprehend has changed, and it seemed like this has happened overnight.
I always had a really hard time understanding my son. The love was automatic, but the comprehension not so much. Ever since he was tiny he was not a cuddler. He nursed around the clock, he liked to be held, but it was never about snuggling and cuddling and just being with me. I always found that frustrating because I love touch.
But lately this has changed. Matthew has started asking me for cuddles. I know the doubters out there will tell me that this is just his way of trying to extend his bedtime. Yes, sometimes it is. I agree. But he also just seems to want to be with us. Take for instance tv watching. It was always alone on his couch or a chair. But, now he wants to be with us, sitting on our laps, our arms wrapped around him holding him.
I don't understand this change. Part of me loves it. I feel reassured that he's growing into a child who thrives on touch and knows we are always here for him. Sometimes I wonder if it's something darker, if we aren't around him as much, if he feels he needs protection. I hope it's the former.
But, the other side of him that has developed is this change in attention span. Forgive me for being a bad parent but this is amazing.
On Sunday morning he watched Dora for 2 straight hours. I sat and read a book and he watched. Occassionally he would demand milk, toast, candy or an apple, but most of the time he was watching and singing and dancing and shouting "Swiper no swiping."
I finally understand the passionate love parents have for shows like Dora and Thomas.
Honestly, I feel like I had it rough when Matty was little and I got no sleep. There was no Baby Einstein that he actually was transfixed on - nothing. So here I am with a toddler who will watch Dora.
Thank God!!!
I'm so letting the tv be the babysitter. Just for the next few weekends :)
I don't know what has happened, what we have done, or really the reason, but it seems like Matty has changed a lot lately.
The little being who I didn't quite comprehend has changed, and it seemed like this has happened overnight.
I always had a really hard time understanding my son. The love was automatic, but the comprehension not so much. Ever since he was tiny he was not a cuddler. He nursed around the clock, he liked to be held, but it was never about snuggling and cuddling and just being with me. I always found that frustrating because I love touch.
But lately this has changed. Matthew has started asking me for cuddles. I know the doubters out there will tell me that this is just his way of trying to extend his bedtime. Yes, sometimes it is. I agree. But he also just seems to want to be with us. Take for instance tv watching. It was always alone on his couch or a chair. But, now he wants to be with us, sitting on our laps, our arms wrapped around him holding him.
I don't understand this change. Part of me loves it. I feel reassured that he's growing into a child who thrives on touch and knows we are always here for him. Sometimes I wonder if it's something darker, if we aren't around him as much, if he feels he needs protection. I hope it's the former.
But, the other side of him that has developed is this change in attention span. Forgive me for being a bad parent but this is amazing.
On Sunday morning he watched Dora for 2 straight hours. I sat and read a book and he watched. Occassionally he would demand milk, toast, candy or an apple, but most of the time he was watching and singing and dancing and shouting "Swiper no swiping."
I finally understand the passionate love parents have for shows like Dora and Thomas.
Honestly, I feel like I had it rough when Matty was little and I got no sleep. There was no Baby Einstein that he actually was transfixed on - nothing. So here I am with a toddler who will watch Dora.
Thank God!!!
I'm so letting the tv be the babysitter. Just for the next few weekends :)
Sunday, August 27, 2006
More pictures from the CNE
Matty asked me to take a picture of the tractor!
Some kids love the big animals - others hate them. Matt was fascinated and hugged them all.
I told Matthew he could go on one ride. All day he told me he wanted the Merry Go Round. He was so happy with his choice. He smiled the whole time
For some fun we went to the splash park at Ontario Place. It was pretty fun except that Matt wanted to run everywhere, so I had to chase him. Some aggressive 6 year olds thought it would be really fun to spray water at me every time I went past them. Geez. Okay - it was pretty funny - and I did dry off pretty quickly...Ever since Matt was born we struggled with sleep issues. Surprisingly not one of the sleep books we read ever mentioned taking your toddler for a walk on the midway to help him drift off - maybe that's what they meant by "some sort of white noise." I don't think Ferber would approve!
The highlight of our day - both going and returning was the trip on the streetcar. Matt was such a big boy - walking up the steps on his own (while I lugged the stroller) and finding a seat. He was pretty excited and actually stayed in his seat.
At the end of the day I turned to him and said "so, did you have a good day?" He looked at me and said "it was perfect." My sentiments exactly!!
Saturday, August 26, 2006
Duckie or Tuesday??
I've started to plan my son's halloween costume.
Okay - I know that sounds crazy, but Martha Stewart I am NOT. And, for some reason I always feel the need to sew Matt's halloween costume.
Seriously. I bought a sewing machine when he was just a couple of months old, and the sole purpose for this purchase was in order to make him a halloween costume. I've made little else since. I've attempted pj's for Matt and Kyla (this was before Paige) but other than that it's halloween costumes.
So ...
Yet again halloween is on the horizon and I thought that I should probably start thinking about what Matt will be - since it will take me forever to make a costume (my time line includes several on the brink of tears phone calls to my sister, handing over some of the sewing to a friend and then getting my mom to finish all the difficult parts). I estimate abut 6 weeks.
So, today I explained halloween to Matt and asked him what he would like to dress up as for halloween.
He said "A duckie - quack - or Tuesday."
So I said "Tuesday?"
And he said "Not friday - Tuesday."
So, I repeated to him "you want to dress up like Tuesday?"
Yep.
So I pulled up a website of halloween costumes. I thought maybe he would be inspired by some pictures - maybe a dragon or maybe a pirate. He was intrigued by the elephant (way above my skill level), but still wants to go with the Tuesday costume.
I have no idea what exactly that means. He clearly has something in his head. I don't know what it is. So I think we will go and look at some patterns - try to figure out if there is, in fact, a costume that meets his expections of Tuesday.
Or maybe I will go with the duck.
Quack.
Okay - I know that sounds crazy, but Martha Stewart I am NOT. And, for some reason I always feel the need to sew Matt's halloween costume.
Seriously. I bought a sewing machine when he was just a couple of months old, and the sole purpose for this purchase was in order to make him a halloween costume. I've made little else since. I've attempted pj's for Matt and Kyla (this was before Paige) but other than that it's halloween costumes.
So ...
Yet again halloween is on the horizon and I thought that I should probably start thinking about what Matt will be - since it will take me forever to make a costume (my time line includes several on the brink of tears phone calls to my sister, handing over some of the sewing to a friend and then getting my mom to finish all the difficult parts). I estimate abut 6 weeks.
So, today I explained halloween to Matt and asked him what he would like to dress up as for halloween.
He said "A duckie - quack - or Tuesday."
So I said "Tuesday?"
And he said "Not friday - Tuesday."
So, I repeated to him "you want to dress up like Tuesday?"
Yep.
So I pulled up a website of halloween costumes. I thought maybe he would be inspired by some pictures - maybe a dragon or maybe a pirate. He was intrigued by the elephant (way above my skill level), but still wants to go with the Tuesday costume.
I have no idea what exactly that means. He clearly has something in his head. I don't know what it is. So I think we will go and look at some patterns - try to figure out if there is, in fact, a costume that meets his expections of Tuesday.
Or maybe I will go with the duck.
Quack.
Friday, August 25, 2006
More Government Fun!!!
So today I made my call to the government - CRA - to figure out what on earth the stupid letter was about.
I decided to call early, sip coffee while on hold, and not lose my cool when I had to talk to an agent. I actually was fairly successful in my calmness.
The conversation, though, was bizarre. First of all, I don't understand why on earth everyone at the CRA is Mr. Last Name or Ms. Last Name. Whatever. The phone call went better than I expected. After several failed attempts at logging into the system, and sitting on hold for only a couple of minutes I finally spoke to someone.
I pled my case - how on earth can I be expected to send you more information when you don't tell me what info you are looking for?
Well, silly me. Apparently all good Canadian citizens (along with all good EA's for that matter) are fully expected to have a well tuned sense of ESP and KNOW that they were simply waiting for something from our 2005 tax return in order to let us keep the money they mailed to me.
Duh.
I should have known that.
Now I do. Situation solved. So, that information will be sent this weekend. And, once they receive the missing information I can keep the full amount of money sent to me. They will, so I was promised by Mrs. Whatshername, clear my debt and I will receive the child tax universal whatever it's called benefit properly.
All in all, not a complete waste of time.
But, I did point out, after I was given all of this information, that had they simply sent a letter telling me what they needed I would have complied.
I also pointed out that it's not fair to send anyone a letter demanding money back - especially when said money was supposed to be applied to childcare. When she said "I don't understand" I explained that I couldn't ask the daycare to refund one day's fee because I would have to send it back to the government.
She suggested I ask.
Seriously.
And, she also suggested I send them the info ASAP so this wouldn't happen again.
Okay. I will.
Rant over.
On to better things. Like the weekend in a few short hours.
I decided to call early, sip coffee while on hold, and not lose my cool when I had to talk to an agent. I actually was fairly successful in my calmness.
The conversation, though, was bizarre. First of all, I don't understand why on earth everyone at the CRA is Mr. Last Name or Ms. Last Name. Whatever. The phone call went better than I expected. After several failed attempts at logging into the system, and sitting on hold for only a couple of minutes I finally spoke to someone.
I pled my case - how on earth can I be expected to send you more information when you don't tell me what info you are looking for?
Well, silly me. Apparently all good Canadian citizens (along with all good EA's for that matter) are fully expected to have a well tuned sense of ESP and KNOW that they were simply waiting for something from our 2005 tax return in order to let us keep the money they mailed to me.
Duh.
I should have known that.
Now I do. Situation solved. So, that information will be sent this weekend. And, once they receive the missing information I can keep the full amount of money sent to me. They will, so I was promised by Mrs. Whatshername, clear my debt and I will receive the child tax universal whatever it's called benefit properly.
All in all, not a complete waste of time.
But, I did point out, after I was given all of this information, that had they simply sent a letter telling me what they needed I would have complied.
I also pointed out that it's not fair to send anyone a letter demanding money back - especially when said money was supposed to be applied to childcare. When she said "I don't understand" I explained that I couldn't ask the daycare to refund one day's fee because I would have to send it back to the government.
She suggested I ask.
Seriously.
And, she also suggested I send them the info ASAP so this wouldn't happen again.
Okay. I will.
Rant over.
On to better things. Like the weekend in a few short hours.
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
Let's go to the Ex!
Yesterday I took the day off and Matt played hooky from daycare and we went to the Ex!
It was soooo much fun. Really.
Part of the excitement was probably because it was a last minute decision. We filled up the stroller and went. And, in case you don't know, my whole parenting philosophy is basically throw caution to the wind and go for it.
So we did!
The highlight of the day for Matt - at least when we started out, was that he got to ride in the streetcar. He LOVES the streetcar.
I was really impressed - he was totally well behaved. I think I maybe shouldn't have told him ig he stuck his hand out the window it would get chopped off. But, it worked and his hands stayed in the streetcar.
Anyway .... so, now for the stories in pictures.
This is in the petting zoo. Matthew loved feeding all of the animals. I freaked out. I hated feeding them. And then there was this woman who Matt tried to feed. Oops. She was overweight (not throwing stones here!) and she honestly said to me "is he trying to feed me cause I look like a cow?" Ummm. No? What do you say? She didn't, but I guess she was self conscious. Seriously ... he's 2!
After the petting zoo I took Matt to see the 
horses. This picture is a pretend horse. It's an automatic ride and you can adjust the speed. Matty climbed on and loved it. The woman even turned the speed up because he was loving it so much! The funny part was when I said say "yee haw" he threw his hand up in the air, just like a cowboy. Calgary Stampede here we come!!!
There were lots more pictures, but blogger won't led me load them.
More tomorrow, I guess.
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
Stupid Government
I don't usually complain about the government. I really don't. I vote. I volunteer. If I have a major opinion on something I do something about it. These days it may mean writing a letter. In unversity I went to a couple of protests.
And, I really hate it when people sit and watch the news and then whine, and never do anything about it.
But allow me this vent for one minute.
We've started getting this universal child care benefit.
I think it's stupid. I mean $100 per month sounds great, but ... it's not that much.
Mike and I aren't eligible for any subsidies, and we have been paying roughly $1350 per month for daycare.
We got our first $100 cheque at the same time that our daycare fees went up by $8 per day. Perfect, I thought, as I cashed the cheque and paid our fees. I was pretty impressed. I was also a little surprised because I got the exact same amount ($100) as my sister who is a Stay at home mom (well, she got it twice since she has 2 kids) and another friend who is a single mom with the father not paying child support.
But, great. A child is a child, and frankly I think we should all get the same amount of money.
And then on Friday I got a letter in the mail telling me that I now owe the government $66.47. Apparently they need more information before they can allow me to keep the whole cheque.
This is ridiculous.
First of all - I pay tax. Every 2 weeks when I get my paycheque close to half of it goes to taxes. In addition to that I've been paying $75 per month to the government for an outstanding amount I owed for a previous year. And, I file my taxes.
But, this stupid letter saying I owe this stupid amount says they need information that I didn't provide. Why would I have sent them more information? I got a cheque in the mail. They didn't ask for any info. I didn't apply for anything. I just got a cheque.
And now they want me to return 33% of the cheque they sent me (which I used to pay for child care) and also send more info. What this info could be eludes me. They did not specify in this letter demanding money. They just simply told me I hadn't sent it.
HELLO - YOU ARE THE GOVERNMENT - YOU HAVE ALL MY INFO.
Clearly, I'm still annoyed. I decided to cool off a couple of days before calling them.
And then today I check the mail.
I GOT ANOTHER $100 CHEQUE.
WTF.
Are they complete idiots? Yes. I do believe they are.
And, I really hate it when people sit and watch the news and then whine, and never do anything about it.
But allow me this vent for one minute.
We've started getting this universal child care benefit.
I think it's stupid. I mean $100 per month sounds great, but ... it's not that much.
Mike and I aren't eligible for any subsidies, and we have been paying roughly $1350 per month for daycare.
We got our first $100 cheque at the same time that our daycare fees went up by $8 per day. Perfect, I thought, as I cashed the cheque and paid our fees. I was pretty impressed. I was also a little surprised because I got the exact same amount ($100) as my sister who is a Stay at home mom (well, she got it twice since she has 2 kids) and another friend who is a single mom with the father not paying child support.
But, great. A child is a child, and frankly I think we should all get the same amount of money.
And then on Friday I got a letter in the mail telling me that I now owe the government $66.47. Apparently they need more information before they can allow me to keep the whole cheque.
This is ridiculous.
First of all - I pay tax. Every 2 weeks when I get my paycheque close to half of it goes to taxes. In addition to that I've been paying $75 per month to the government for an outstanding amount I owed for a previous year. And, I file my taxes.
But, this stupid letter saying I owe this stupid amount says they need information that I didn't provide. Why would I have sent them more information? I got a cheque in the mail. They didn't ask for any info. I didn't apply for anything. I just got a cheque.
And now they want me to return 33% of the cheque they sent me (which I used to pay for child care) and also send more info. What this info could be eludes me. They did not specify in this letter demanding money. They just simply told me I hadn't sent it.
HELLO - YOU ARE THE GOVERNMENT - YOU HAVE ALL MY INFO.
Clearly, I'm still annoyed. I decided to cool off a couple of days before calling them.
And then today I check the mail.
I GOT ANOTHER $100 CHEQUE.
WTF.
Are they complete idiots? Yes. I do believe they are.
Sunday, August 20, 2006
Tired
I'm tired.
I thought tonight I would get to go to bed early. We took Matthew out all day, and he slept for only a little while, in the car, while I went grocery shopping and Mike sat in the car with him.
Seriously.
Matt got up and started entertaining me at 6 am. We went to the Burlington kids' festival for the afternoon. We then spent the evening at my parents' house where he chased his cousin around and played with one of his favourite adults. He should be tired.
I am.
We kept him awake in the car because we knew that it is impossible to put him down after he's had an evening nap in the car.
And, then, I even allowed him to sleep in my bed. Why? Because I had the blissful idea that we would doze off together, snuggled up in the bed while Mike was out having a beer with some friends.
But, no.
No no no.
Nice thought though.
Instead, here we are. 10 pm has come and gone and Matt is still awake. We gave up on the idea of being in my bed and decided to snuggle on the couch and watch the teen choice awards. Poor child was traumatized by a) Jessica Simpson's horrendous eye make up b) Britney Spears in her bizarre pregnant and slutty state and c) Kevin Federline. And, at this point, if I have to turn on Treehouse, Barney, Wiggles or Veggie Tales I will literally lose it. And then it happens.
My child pees on me.
Yep - I'm tired, cranky, freaked out by Britney and I get peed on.
It was the weirdest feeling. He actually peed on my lap, so it was the strange sudden sensation that maybe I was suddenly experiencing incontence. I just had no idea. And then I realized, and Matt laughed and I laughed and then I showered.
Ick.
So, now my wide awake monkey and I are watching Nanny 911.
Why? Well, cause it's 10:15 and my toddler is wide awake. And, it's really reassuring to watch parents who have worse problems than me. Ahhh!
I thought tonight I would get to go to bed early. We took Matthew out all day, and he slept for only a little while, in the car, while I went grocery shopping and Mike sat in the car with him.
Seriously.
Matt got up and started entertaining me at 6 am. We went to the Burlington kids' festival for the afternoon. We then spent the evening at my parents' house where he chased his cousin around and played with one of his favourite adults. He should be tired.
I am.
We kept him awake in the car because we knew that it is impossible to put him down after he's had an evening nap in the car.
And, then, I even allowed him to sleep in my bed. Why? Because I had the blissful idea that we would doze off together, snuggled up in the bed while Mike was out having a beer with some friends.
But, no.
No no no.
Nice thought though.
Instead, here we are. 10 pm has come and gone and Matt is still awake. We gave up on the idea of being in my bed and decided to snuggle on the couch and watch the teen choice awards. Poor child was traumatized by a) Jessica Simpson's horrendous eye make up b) Britney Spears in her bizarre pregnant and slutty state and c) Kevin Federline. And, at this point, if I have to turn on Treehouse, Barney, Wiggles or Veggie Tales I will literally lose it. And then it happens.
My child pees on me.
Yep - I'm tired, cranky, freaked out by Britney and I get peed on.
It was the weirdest feeling. He actually peed on my lap, so it was the strange sudden sensation that maybe I was suddenly experiencing incontence. I just had no idea. And then I realized, and Matt laughed and I laughed and then I showered.
Ick.
So, now my wide awake monkey and I are watching Nanny 911.
Why? Well, cause it's 10:15 and my toddler is wide awake. And, it's really reassuring to watch parents who have worse problems than me. Ahhh!
He's a Big Girl (I mean Boy)
Matty's favourite line lately is "I'm a big girl."
Okay, he's a boy. we know. He doens't quite get that, but whatever. The point is, he is ready to be a big kid, he's growing up.
On Friday our daycare administrator approached me. She told me that she think Matthew is ready for "toilet learning". I knew this day was coming. I know parents anticipate it for years, or at least months. But, I honestly admitted to her that I'm not ready. I'm not.
I have no interest in discussing potties, cleaning up accidents, etc. etc. But, he is ready. And so I will suck it up an start training him. All the signs are there. He wakes up with a dry diaper. He tells us when he needs a change and he is obsessed with the potty. The morning he told me he needed the potty, pulled off his diaper, sat down and peed.
Okay - it was impressive.
I'm beginning to think he may train himself.
According to the daycare admin, there has only ever been one boy go to the preschool class toilet trained. I think Matt is scheduled to move up in October. Is this a challenge???
My friend's daughter pretty much trained herself. Salina had been trying for weeks, and then one day her daughter refused to put on diapers, would only wear underwear, and wanted to use the potty. Okay, it was pretty funny because she decided to do this on a day when Salina, Ginny and I were going to a playgroup, and when this little girl makes up her mind, it's made up. But the point is when she was ready she was ready. As is Matt apparently.
And this morning he told me he wants Diego underwear (we only have Bob the Builder). Ummm .... okay. I shall buy those (does this come out of clothing budget or out of our grocery budget where the diapers come out of - see questions I am unprepared to answer).
But, there have been other signs of him growing up.
First of all, his speech has changed so much. He talks in complete sentences and thoughts. It's pretty amazing. For instance he says "Matty hurt his knee yesterday. I'm okay now" Wow.
I love this speech development. I have always talked to him constantly. (shocker) and finally he responds constantly. Sometimes it's almost a contest to see who can talk first.
He is also really quick witted. Like, yesterday he kept doing the same thing over and over. Frustrated, I turned to him and said "Matthew I already said no." And he said "Mommy, I already said yes".
What???
Kids - they're amazing.
Okay, he's a boy. we know. He doens't quite get that, but whatever. The point is, he is ready to be a big kid, he's growing up.
On Friday our daycare administrator approached me. She told me that she think Matthew is ready for "toilet learning". I knew this day was coming. I know parents anticipate it for years, or at least months. But, I honestly admitted to her that I'm not ready. I'm not.
I have no interest in discussing potties, cleaning up accidents, etc. etc. But, he is ready. And so I will suck it up an start training him. All the signs are there. He wakes up with a dry diaper. He tells us when he needs a change and he is obsessed with the potty. The morning he told me he needed the potty, pulled off his diaper, sat down and peed.
Okay - it was impressive.
I'm beginning to think he may train himself.
According to the daycare admin, there has only ever been one boy go to the preschool class toilet trained. I think Matt is scheduled to move up in October. Is this a challenge???
My friend's daughter pretty much trained herself. Salina had been trying for weeks, and then one day her daughter refused to put on diapers, would only wear underwear, and wanted to use the potty. Okay, it was pretty funny because she decided to do this on a day when Salina, Ginny and I were going to a playgroup, and when this little girl makes up her mind, it's made up. But the point is when she was ready she was ready. As is Matt apparently.
And this morning he told me he wants Diego underwear (we only have Bob the Builder). Ummm .... okay. I shall buy those (does this come out of clothing budget or out of our grocery budget where the diapers come out of - see questions I am unprepared to answer).
But, there have been other signs of him growing up.
First of all, his speech has changed so much. He talks in complete sentences and thoughts. It's pretty amazing. For instance he says "Matty hurt his knee yesterday. I'm okay now" Wow.
I love this speech development. I have always talked to him constantly. (shocker) and finally he responds constantly. Sometimes it's almost a contest to see who can talk first.
He is also really quick witted. Like, yesterday he kept doing the same thing over and over. Frustrated, I turned to him and said "Matthew I already said no." And he said "Mommy, I already said yes".
What???
Kids - they're amazing.
Saturday, August 19, 2006
Strength
This week has given me a lot to think about.
We're nearing the end of summer, and with the last few weeks on the horizon we've been making a concerted effort to be outside, to spend time with Matt (that does not involve spending money, buying stuff or any other commercial interests). It's meant a lot of picnics, a lot of time at playgrounds, and in the end a much happier child.
One of the changes we've made is that we leave early every morning to take Matthew to the payground in front of daycare. He loves running around. And, I'm not quite sure if it's because we are paying so much attention to him or because he's just having fun being a kid. But whatever it is we are seeing a happier child. And, what I've added to the end of his daily routine is that I let him play at the playground when I pick him up.
We don't always spend an hour. Sometimes we only spend 5 minutes. But the point is that we are doing it. I've begun to understand that postponing dinner by a few minutes to play with my child is worth it. And, I wish I'd done it earlier.
But I've had lots of stuff to think about this week too.
Follow me if you will - one of my favourite bloggers has been talking a lot about the physical aspect of children. It is beautifully written and I love to read what she says, and what people say in response (badladies.blogspot.com).
It's not fair for me to try to paraphrase her because her writing and her knowledge and just general wisdom is on a level WAY above mine. So go read it. But, the point I think she is making is that we should be comfortable celebrating our children however we can - including their physical selves. It's beautiful and eloquent and well thought out.
But, at the same time, in my e-mail this week I've been following a story of a girl I used to babysit. I have kept in touch with her mom through e-mail for years. This family is one of the most wholesome loving families I have ever met. They have raised their children well, and I have consciously or unconsciously taken some of her parenting techniques and applied them to my own life.
And, awhile ago she sent me an e-mail telling me about some issues her daughter is struggling with. At the moment she is hospitalized with a severe eating disorder and going through extensive counselling, etc. In the last year she's fought this eating disorder and depression. At the same time she finished her first year of university with phenomenal grades, and was planning to spend the summer in China.
What happened?
I don't think anyone really knows.
I have my own thoughts on depression. And I'm not for a second suggesting or implying that her parents have at all contributed to any of this.
But it all makes me wonder how all of this is all tied to together. Here we are as new, young moms trying to love our children as much as we can, do what's best for them and help them to succeed. We're admitting our failures and applauding our successes. And, our kids are pretty cool.
The other day my husband said that he sometimes thinks Matthew is a perfect kid - he has his faults, but he's just so pure and fresh and full of love.
And then something happens. What? And how do we protect them? How do we let them go out on their own and grow up while still keeping them close. I don't know. And how do we try to take care of them while letting them struggle with their own battles.
The mother I was talking about whose daugther is literally fighting for her life ... I think she would tell me that you love them and keep loving them and trust that all of these challenges make them stronger.
I really hope that's true.
We're nearing the end of summer, and with the last few weeks on the horizon we've been making a concerted effort to be outside, to spend time with Matt (that does not involve spending money, buying stuff or any other commercial interests). It's meant a lot of picnics, a lot of time at playgrounds, and in the end a much happier child.
One of the changes we've made is that we leave early every morning to take Matthew to the payground in front of daycare. He loves running around. And, I'm not quite sure if it's because we are paying so much attention to him or because he's just having fun being a kid. But whatever it is we are seeing a happier child. And, what I've added to the end of his daily routine is that I let him play at the playground when I pick him up.
We don't always spend an hour. Sometimes we only spend 5 minutes. But the point is that we are doing it. I've begun to understand that postponing dinner by a few minutes to play with my child is worth it. And, I wish I'd done it earlier.
But I've had lots of stuff to think about this week too.
Follow me if you will - one of my favourite bloggers has been talking a lot about the physical aspect of children. It is beautifully written and I love to read what she says, and what people say in response (badladies.blogspot.com).
It's not fair for me to try to paraphrase her because her writing and her knowledge and just general wisdom is on a level WAY above mine. So go read it. But, the point I think she is making is that we should be comfortable celebrating our children however we can - including their physical selves. It's beautiful and eloquent and well thought out.
But, at the same time, in my e-mail this week I've been following a story of a girl I used to babysit. I have kept in touch with her mom through e-mail for years. This family is one of the most wholesome loving families I have ever met. They have raised their children well, and I have consciously or unconsciously taken some of her parenting techniques and applied them to my own life.
And, awhile ago she sent me an e-mail telling me about some issues her daughter is struggling with. At the moment she is hospitalized with a severe eating disorder and going through extensive counselling, etc. In the last year she's fought this eating disorder and depression. At the same time she finished her first year of university with phenomenal grades, and was planning to spend the summer in China.
What happened?
I don't think anyone really knows.
I have my own thoughts on depression. And I'm not for a second suggesting or implying that her parents have at all contributed to any of this.
But it all makes me wonder how all of this is all tied to together. Here we are as new, young moms trying to love our children as much as we can, do what's best for them and help them to succeed. We're admitting our failures and applauding our successes. And, our kids are pretty cool.
The other day my husband said that he sometimes thinks Matthew is a perfect kid - he has his faults, but he's just so pure and fresh and full of love.
And then something happens. What? And how do we protect them? How do we let them go out on their own and grow up while still keeping them close. I don't know. And how do we try to take care of them while letting them struggle with their own battles.
The mother I was talking about whose daugther is literally fighting for her life ... I think she would tell me that you love them and keep loving them and trust that all of these challenges make them stronger.
I really hope that's true.
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Cuddles
One of the things that we have gone back and forth on is the topic of co-sleeping, or, in other words, letting Matty sleep in the bed with Mike and I.
Some of my friends who are parents are big on it. Their kids sleep in the bed every night. Other friends are adamently opposed, and never let their kids sleep in the bed. Ever.
Our feelings on this are kind of mixed. Matt slept with us for ages, but the day we quit breastfeeding we put him in his own crib and that was the end of him being in our bed. He was 19 months, and in our eyes it was time. He never complained. He seemed to like his own space and actually slept through the night and we were happy. And so we went from Sears to Ferber overnight. Or so it seemed.
But lately Matt has been crawling in bed with us.
It started pretty innocently. While on vacation he had his own bed, but he was scared and would climb into our nice big bed. Then when we got back he was out of routine and wanted us to climb into his bed to help him fall asleep. We pushed back because we didn't really want to have to sleep in his bed every night. And after a couple weeks he was over that.
But lately he's been coming into our bed. Like on the weekend at about 4 am he'll hop in and sleep for a couple hours. My thoughts on this - it's okay because otherwise we'd be up at 4am, so if it means more sleep that's fine.
Besides, I kind of like it. I love that he snuggles up with me and I get the hugs that are so lacking when he is running around being a typical 2 year old.
And then last night, it happened.
We had a late night. Mike and I were shooting our last challenge for the show and Eric (Matty's godfather) was babysitting. We got home around 9:30 and then had some birthday cake for Eric. And, then it was 10pm. And, Matty was wired. Mike was driving Eric home and I was exhausted. So, I told Matty he could cuddle with Mommy.
I know it's a slippery slope. But, I was tired, he was tired, and I didn't feel like getting up with him 15 times. In about 10 minutes we were both sound asleep. Mike got home and neither of us woke up. He dutifully picked Matthew up and brought him to bed, and he slept all night.
So will he be sleeping in our bed? I don't think so.
I like him being in his own bed. But, sometimes, just sometimes, I think I will let him in. Because last night's sleep was so great!
Some of my friends who are parents are big on it. Their kids sleep in the bed every night. Other friends are adamently opposed, and never let their kids sleep in the bed. Ever.
Our feelings on this are kind of mixed. Matt slept with us for ages, but the day we quit breastfeeding we put him in his own crib and that was the end of him being in our bed. He was 19 months, and in our eyes it was time. He never complained. He seemed to like his own space and actually slept through the night and we were happy. And so we went from Sears to Ferber overnight. Or so it seemed.
But lately Matt has been crawling in bed with us.
It started pretty innocently. While on vacation he had his own bed, but he was scared and would climb into our nice big bed. Then when we got back he was out of routine and wanted us to climb into his bed to help him fall asleep. We pushed back because we didn't really want to have to sleep in his bed every night. And after a couple weeks he was over that.
But lately he's been coming into our bed. Like on the weekend at about 4 am he'll hop in and sleep for a couple hours. My thoughts on this - it's okay because otherwise we'd be up at 4am, so if it means more sleep that's fine.
Besides, I kind of like it. I love that he snuggles up with me and I get the hugs that are so lacking when he is running around being a typical 2 year old.
And then last night, it happened.
We had a late night. Mike and I were shooting our last challenge for the show and Eric (Matty's godfather) was babysitting. We got home around 9:30 and then had some birthday cake for Eric. And, then it was 10pm. And, Matty was wired. Mike was driving Eric home and I was exhausted. So, I told Matty he could cuddle with Mommy.
I know it's a slippery slope. But, I was tired, he was tired, and I didn't feel like getting up with him 15 times. In about 10 minutes we were both sound asleep. Mike got home and neither of us woke up. He dutifully picked Matthew up and brought him to bed, and he slept all night.
So will he be sleeping in our bed? I don't think so.
I like him being in his own bed. But, sometimes, just sometimes, I think I will let him in. Because last night's sleep was so great!
Monday, August 14, 2006
Hubba Hubba!
Matty often says things that are hilarious.
Sometimes on purpose, sometimes by mistake, sometimes he mispronounces something and it makes us laugh.
But by far the funniest of his sayings is "Hubba Hubba".
Lest you think my child is already eyeing women, I should explain. It's part of a song as in
"hubba hubba world so high - like a diamond in the sky"
Yep. The famous Twinkle Twinkle little star. The problem is that he doesn't get that far. He just loves singing over and over again
Hubba hubba world so high.
And it kills me, every time.
Yesterday we were at the playground and I was pushing Matt on the swing. He loves to sing and swing, and over and over he just kept singing the one line. The people playing tennis just kept looking at him. Eventually he moved on to his ABC's.
Lately Matty's been talking a ton. He's on to full sentences, and he is understanding concepts. Like, if you ask him how his dinner is "it's delicious".
Yesterday I asked how he was and he said "I'm wonderful".
Or, "the white moon in the blue sky is beautiful."
I don't know where this all comes from. But, I love the positivity, and the excitement.
Hubba hubba!
Sometimes on purpose, sometimes by mistake, sometimes he mispronounces something and it makes us laugh.
But by far the funniest of his sayings is "Hubba Hubba".
Lest you think my child is already eyeing women, I should explain. It's part of a song as in
"hubba hubba world so high - like a diamond in the sky"
Yep. The famous Twinkle Twinkle little star. The problem is that he doesn't get that far. He just loves singing over and over again
Hubba hubba world so high.
And it kills me, every time.
Yesterday we were at the playground and I was pushing Matt on the swing. He loves to sing and swing, and over and over he just kept singing the one line. The people playing tennis just kept looking at him. Eventually he moved on to his ABC's.
Lately Matty's been talking a ton. He's on to full sentences, and he is understanding concepts. Like, if you ask him how his dinner is "it's delicious".
Yesterday I asked how he was and he said "I'm wonderful".
Or, "the white moon in the blue sky is beautiful."
I don't know where this all comes from. But, I love the positivity, and the excitement.
Hubba hubba!
Friday, August 11, 2006
So Much Miscellaneous Stuff
It seems like so much has been going on lately that I've missed out on tons of stuff and also haven't really posted on tons of stuff.
Work has been pretty crazy lately. My closest colleague went on vacation and in those 2 weeks I really really missed her and realized just how much stuff she does behind the scenes. Another one of our colleagues, also and E.A. went on vacation for a month (seriously, a month!) and so we've been filling in for her, and between all of that, some crazy stuff going on in the office and, well, just general life I realized that I hadn't even seen people who work in the same building as me in, like, ages.
I sent an e-mail to someone who works a few floors above me - and he was like "are you even working here?" oops. Okay, but this was the same person who called me a Drama Queen - so whatever. He needed some isolation!!!
Anyway, here it goes.
So, first my brush with celebrity.
Guess who was filiming outside my office yesterday? Donnie Wahlberg. Yep. Cool. I know. Even if you weren't a big new kids fan chances are you liked Sixth Sense. Plus, who doesn't like celebrities.
I realized who it was when I was walking across the street with my shopping buddy. we had just stopped at timmies for a coffee (I had 2 - one for me, one for Beth). When I saw Donnie I promptly handed over my coffees to our new VP - and tried to get an autograph. I wasn't allowed, but whatever.
Note to self - before throwing cups of coffee at your new boss (well, arms length boss) make sure that he knows you well enough to respect that sometimes you just need to be silly. Luckily he has 3 kids, knows that this was a moment of craziness, and actually sent me a follow up e-mail laughing about the whole thing.
Whew.
And, speaking of celebrities, I watched Entertainment Tonight this week. No biggie, usually, except that I realized I was totally out of the celebrity gossip loop. Who knew Robin Williams was in rehab or that Carmen Electra and Dave Navarro had split up? I'm still back in the land of Pam Anderson getting married!!! What is happening? Have there been any Suri sightings? I need to watch more.
But, in other exciting me news ...
This morning I discovered that I have lost 25 pounds. Now, since I'm doing weight watchers and I am technically supposed to weigh myself once a week (not once every 3 hours) it won't count till Monday, but still! I'm pretty excited by that. Though I'm also really just hitting that point of not being so enthusiastic about counting points. Tomorrow I will start again. I have a ways to go still.
Thursday, August 10, 2006
Simon Says ...
Last night we discovered that the geniuses in our lives (aka the daycare teachers) have taught Matty a very new and effective game.
SIMON SAYS!
Now we don't play it exactly as it is supposed to go. Matthew doesn't quite understand that if you say "Simon says touch your toes" that you touch your toes, but if you just say "Touch your toes" you don't do it cause Simon didn't say it. But, whatever.
Who cares?
We have found a new way to manipulate our child without the dreaded use of the word no which always sends him into a temper tantrum. (Note that we do say no frequently, but try to use other words when possible so No has a bigger impact).
Last night he hopped up on the coffee table, threw his hands out in front of him (a la 'jazz fingers' in the movie Bring it On, which by the way, I love) and shouted "Sirens".
Mike and I looked at each other perplexed and both said "Sirens??"
Then Matty says "Sirens - touch your head" and touched his head, delighted by his new game.
And then suddenly we got it. duh. Simon Says.
We looked at each other and wondered how much magic this new game would hold.
So we played along. We did things like:
"Simon says Dance" and he danced.
"Simon says Touch your nose" and he touched his nose.
And then Mike said "Simon says take your shoes off". Matthew jumped off the table and took off his shoes.
This worked for the entire bedtime routine.
It was amazing.
And, in 15 minutes he was in bed.
SIMON SAYS!
Now we don't play it exactly as it is supposed to go. Matthew doesn't quite understand that if you say "Simon says touch your toes" that you touch your toes, but if you just say "Touch your toes" you don't do it cause Simon didn't say it. But, whatever.
Who cares?
We have found a new way to manipulate our child without the dreaded use of the word no which always sends him into a temper tantrum. (Note that we do say no frequently, but try to use other words when possible so No has a bigger impact).
Last night he hopped up on the coffee table, threw his hands out in front of him (a la 'jazz fingers' in the movie Bring it On, which by the way, I love) and shouted "Sirens".
Mike and I looked at each other perplexed and both said "Sirens??"
Then Matty says "Sirens - touch your head" and touched his head, delighted by his new game.
And then suddenly we got it. duh. Simon Says.
We looked at each other and wondered how much magic this new game would hold.
So we played along. We did things like:
"Simon says Dance" and he danced.
"Simon says Touch your nose" and he touched his nose.
And then Mike said "Simon says take your shoes off". Matthew jumped off the table and took off his shoes.
This worked for the entire bedtime routine.
It was amazing.
And, in 15 minutes he was in bed.
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
Pearl Jam or Amy Grant??
It turns out that Matty has an eclectic taste in music.
Truthfully, Mike and I have very differing tastes in music, so we both have tried to educate Matt in the music we like. I'm more of a top 40, sing along to the radio, easy listening kind of girl. Well, kind of. I'm all over the map. The very first mix cd I created included Britney, Ozzy, Pink, Spice Girls and Biff Naked.
Mike's tastes run from Pink Floyd to ABBA to Beethoven.
And, considering that we were both educated in classical music, you never know what taste Matt will develop.
Let's just say it's bizarre.
Here's the thing. Matthew has a tape player, and when I was cleaning up one day I discovered an Amy Grant tape (circa 1987). Since it was that or the Wiggles, and I thought I would scream if I heard the Wiggles one more time, I decided to put it on.
Well ...
Matthew cannot sleep without Amy Grant. I walk around all evening while Matt is drifting off singing a few of the Christian Rock classics. I think this is good. I like the message, and I really did love that tape when I was in grade 6. (I went to Christian school - Amy Grant was the coolest!) It could be worse.
The funny thing about this tape is that it is Amy Grant Unplugged. Yep. I know that's funny. I can see some people who are reading this rolling on the floor by now. But, anyway, all the people in the tape clap and cheer (the audience) and so Matt cheers right along with them.
It's really cute.
But, then this weekend Mike got the new Pink Floyd DVD. He was very excited about this and insisted that we watch it.
Wonderchild that Matthew is, he has decided that these "movies" are better than TV. He sits with Mike just watching the light show and asking about the singers. It is truly truly bizarre.
And now we are wondering what exactly he will listen to as he gets older.
Hmmmm ....
Does a child's musical taste develop at the age of 2? What will he rebel and listen to?
I don't know.
Truthfully, Mike and I have very differing tastes in music, so we both have tried to educate Matt in the music we like. I'm more of a top 40, sing along to the radio, easy listening kind of girl. Well, kind of. I'm all over the map. The very first mix cd I created included Britney, Ozzy, Pink, Spice Girls and Biff Naked.
Mike's tastes run from Pink Floyd to ABBA to Beethoven.
And, considering that we were both educated in classical music, you never know what taste Matt will develop.
Let's just say it's bizarre.
Here's the thing. Matthew has a tape player, and when I was cleaning up one day I discovered an Amy Grant tape (circa 1987). Since it was that or the Wiggles, and I thought I would scream if I heard the Wiggles one more time, I decided to put it on.
Well ...
Matthew cannot sleep without Amy Grant. I walk around all evening while Matt is drifting off singing a few of the Christian Rock classics. I think this is good. I like the message, and I really did love that tape when I was in grade 6. (I went to Christian school - Amy Grant was the coolest!) It could be worse.
The funny thing about this tape is that it is Amy Grant Unplugged. Yep. I know that's funny. I can see some people who are reading this rolling on the floor by now. But, anyway, all the people in the tape clap and cheer (the audience) and so Matt cheers right along with them.
It's really cute.
But, then this weekend Mike got the new Pink Floyd DVD. He was very excited about this and insisted that we watch it.
Wonderchild that Matthew is, he has decided that these "movies" are better than TV. He sits with Mike just watching the light show and asking about the singers. It is truly truly bizarre.
And now we are wondering what exactly he will listen to as he gets older.
Hmmmm ....
Does a child's musical taste develop at the age of 2? What will he rebel and listen to?
I don't know.
Monday, August 07, 2006
Long weekend fun!
This long weekend rocked!
I think we all were ready for a break - and we actually finally had one.
well, sort of.
We were taping for the show on Saturday. But, given that it was the Saturday of a long weekend that started a one-week hiatus for the production, everyone was really quick. There were no extra takes, we got our challenge quickly, and within a couple of hours we were done. In fact, we were done about an hour before Mike's parents were done babysitting, so we took a nap and enjoyed the bliss that comes from a child free condo on a Saturday afternoon.
And then yesterday we didn't do too much. Of course we worked on one of our challenges (it is a tough one), and then in the middle of the day Mike's friend Zac came for a visit. It was just an impromtu cup of coffee, but it was nice to catch up, to laugh and just have a nice visit. Honestly, it's really nice to have people just drop by unexpectedly. And, it was just such a visit.
And, then today we decided to take Matty to Sherwood Park.
We haven't been there since the days of being dog owners (our dog, Jack, now happily resides with my in-laws in Peterborough where he is happier, better behaved and has an acre of yard to run in).
Sherwood is a leash free dog park, but it also has a playground and a water park. Matt was totally in his element with all the kids and dogs and water. It was fantastic. We spent a couple of hours just being outside, having fun and relaxing. And, there were so many highlights.
It was pretty cool to watch Matt interacting with other kids. He is so social and happy and will talk to pretty much any kid. And, the other neat thing was watching him with the animals. Right now we are really not ready to have a dog. Our cat is fine, but having a dog was overwhelming for us. But, someday we will. And, I loved seeing how comfortable he was around the dogs. He knows to put his hand out and let the dogs come to him. He's learned not to pull the dogs' tails and all of that. So it was pretty cute just watching him being a kid, playing and having a full day of Mommy and Daddy before going to daycare tomorrow.
I LOVE LONG WEEKENDS!!!
I think we all were ready for a break - and we actually finally had one.
well, sort of.
We were taping for the show on Saturday. But, given that it was the Saturday of a long weekend that started a one-week hiatus for the production, everyone was really quick. There were no extra takes, we got our challenge quickly, and within a couple of hours we were done. In fact, we were done about an hour before Mike's parents were done babysitting, so we took a nap and enjoyed the bliss that comes from a child free condo on a Saturday afternoon.
And then yesterday we didn't do too much. Of course we worked on one of our challenges (it is a tough one), and then in the middle of the day Mike's friend Zac came for a visit. It was just an impromtu cup of coffee, but it was nice to catch up, to laugh and just have a nice visit. Honestly, it's really nice to have people just drop by unexpectedly. And, it was just such a visit.
And, then today we decided to take Matty to Sherwood Park.
We haven't been there since the days of being dog owners (our dog, Jack, now happily resides with my in-laws in Peterborough where he is happier, better behaved and has an acre of yard to run in).
Sherwood is a leash free dog park, but it also has a playground and a water park. Matt was totally in his element with all the kids and dogs and water. It was fantastic. We spent a couple of hours just being outside, having fun and relaxing. And, there were so many highlights.
It was pretty cool to watch Matt interacting with other kids. He is so social and happy and will talk to pretty much any kid. And, the other neat thing was watching him with the animals. Right now we are really not ready to have a dog. Our cat is fine, but having a dog was overwhelming for us. But, someday we will. And, I loved seeing how comfortable he was around the dogs. He knows to put his hand out and let the dogs come to him. He's learned not to pull the dogs' tails and all of that. So it was pretty cute just watching him being a kid, playing and having a full day of Mommy and Daddy before going to daycare tomorrow.
I LOVE LONG WEEKENDS!!!
Saturday, August 05, 2006
Friends
So, yesterday I was reading Rebecca's blog and she was talking about friends. In specific, she was talking about a thank you list for her book, but what it came down to was that it was a post on friendship.
And, it got me thinking - a lot.
It got me thinking about friends, how I define a friend, and how, perhaps others define me as a friend.
A lot of blogs lately discuss this whole issue of friendships when you become a mother (Heather wrote a good one, and I will figure out the linking thing soon).
But, really I got thinking just about the whole friends thing.
It's a weird thing to reflect on.
For me friends fall into several categories. There are the immediate friends - the ones you see every day. And, by this I am not referring to the acquaintances that you bump into or say hi to on the elevator. If that were the case I'd have about 200 friends at work alone.
But, really, at work, I consider myself to have only a few friends. Chances are, if you are reading this (or even better have me in your favourites, DD!) then I consider you a friend. And, work friends are tough because you see work people ALL the time. So, to become a true friend it takes time. Do you trust that person to not gossip about you - or at least not in a bad way? Do you like that person enough to go for coffee and lunch? If you felt like you were so frustrated by work that you need to confide in someone or quit can you talk to that person? Then, yep, that person is a friend, and I consider myself pretty lucky to have some good friends, who I happen to work with. And, I hope they think of me in the same way.
But, then there are the murky friendship waters that I don't really want to wade into.
For instance, if I haven't spoken to someone in years are they still my friend? I don't know. I hope so.
My best friend growing up still stays in touch. We never see each other. She lives on the other side of the country, and it's been about 15 years since we actually hung out in person and talked. Wedding gifts were sent across the country. We both shared some tears reading e-mails about post-partum depression (we both suffered it, about a year apart since my son is a year older thna her son). As we have gotten older we have changed. And, we are really different. Do I think that we would be close if we met again? I don't know. But, deep down I still consider her my bestest friend in the world.
And, then there are the friends that I just don't see enough of, or call enough, or write enough. Like, Susie. She was my maid of honour. She is Matt's godmother. She was the only person (other than Mike and the 6 million doctors, midwives and nurses) I allowed in while giving birth. And, she's off following her dreams as a midwife in Windsor. And, I haven't once hopped in my car and driven out to see her. Why? I don't know. But, I love her, and she stills ranks up there on my friends list.
And, other friends too are in that category. Are we growing apart? Kind of. I don't call them for everything. We don't share all of our heartbreaks anymore. When we get together we don't just automatically know where to start the conversation. It's a little rocky at first. But, then we do get talking and it is a ton of fun. It just takes time.
I still see a group of highschool friends - sometimes we get together monthly, sometimes not for a couple of years. Some of my mommy friends from mat leave I just don't have time to see, but I still miss and still consider them friends.
Am I saying I'm just way too popular for my own good? Yep. That's it. That must be it. I just have way too many friends!!!!
I'm kidding of course.
But, in my books, if you're my friend, you're my friend. Period. It may be minutes or it may be years. But, I really do believe that unless we've had some falling out there's always hope.
I guess the best way it was ever described to me was by a friend in 9th grade. She said that friends are like boyfriends. At first everything is hot and heavy. You want to spend all your time with that person. And, then you get used to each other. Some people break up and others become the couple that are together all through highschool.
And, it's true.
So, to my current hot and heavy friends, YOU ROCK! And, if we're not so hot and heavy right now, you still rock. I just need to pick up the phone one of these days to call you and let you know :)
But the nice thing about friendships as opposed to relationships is that you can have more than one friend at once and no one's feelings will be hurt.
Oh - and about that friend from grade 9 -- we did have a falling out and we never speak anymore. And, lest you think she is super intelligent from that one piece of wisdom her other favourite saying was "you can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can't wipe your friends under the couch."
Yep. Whatever!
Happy long weekend.
And, it got me thinking - a lot.
It got me thinking about friends, how I define a friend, and how, perhaps others define me as a friend.
A lot of blogs lately discuss this whole issue of friendships when you become a mother (Heather wrote a good one, and I will figure out the linking thing soon).
But, really I got thinking just about the whole friends thing.
It's a weird thing to reflect on.
For me friends fall into several categories. There are the immediate friends - the ones you see every day. And, by this I am not referring to the acquaintances that you bump into or say hi to on the elevator. If that were the case I'd have about 200 friends at work alone.
But, really, at work, I consider myself to have only a few friends. Chances are, if you are reading this (or even better have me in your favourites, DD!) then I consider you a friend. And, work friends are tough because you see work people ALL the time. So, to become a true friend it takes time. Do you trust that person to not gossip about you - or at least not in a bad way? Do you like that person enough to go for coffee and lunch? If you felt like you were so frustrated by work that you need to confide in someone or quit can you talk to that person? Then, yep, that person is a friend, and I consider myself pretty lucky to have some good friends, who I happen to work with. And, I hope they think of me in the same way.
But, then there are the murky friendship waters that I don't really want to wade into.
For instance, if I haven't spoken to someone in years are they still my friend? I don't know. I hope so.
My best friend growing up still stays in touch. We never see each other. She lives on the other side of the country, and it's been about 15 years since we actually hung out in person and talked. Wedding gifts were sent across the country. We both shared some tears reading e-mails about post-partum depression (we both suffered it, about a year apart since my son is a year older thna her son). As we have gotten older we have changed. And, we are really different. Do I think that we would be close if we met again? I don't know. But, deep down I still consider her my bestest friend in the world.
And, then there are the friends that I just don't see enough of, or call enough, or write enough. Like, Susie. She was my maid of honour. She is Matt's godmother. She was the only person (other than Mike and the 6 million doctors, midwives and nurses) I allowed in while giving birth. And, she's off following her dreams as a midwife in Windsor. And, I haven't once hopped in my car and driven out to see her. Why? I don't know. But, I love her, and she stills ranks up there on my friends list.
And, other friends too are in that category. Are we growing apart? Kind of. I don't call them for everything. We don't share all of our heartbreaks anymore. When we get together we don't just automatically know where to start the conversation. It's a little rocky at first. But, then we do get talking and it is a ton of fun. It just takes time.
I still see a group of highschool friends - sometimes we get together monthly, sometimes not for a couple of years. Some of my mommy friends from mat leave I just don't have time to see, but I still miss and still consider them friends.
Am I saying I'm just way too popular for my own good? Yep. That's it. That must be it. I just have way too many friends!!!!
I'm kidding of course.
But, in my books, if you're my friend, you're my friend. Period. It may be minutes or it may be years. But, I really do believe that unless we've had some falling out there's always hope.
I guess the best way it was ever described to me was by a friend in 9th grade. She said that friends are like boyfriends. At first everything is hot and heavy. You want to spend all your time with that person. And, then you get used to each other. Some people break up and others become the couple that are together all through highschool.
And, it's true.
So, to my current hot and heavy friends, YOU ROCK! And, if we're not so hot and heavy right now, you still rock. I just need to pick up the phone one of these days to call you and let you know :)
But the nice thing about friendships as opposed to relationships is that you can have more than one friend at once and no one's feelings will be hurt.
Oh - and about that friend from grade 9 -- we did have a falling out and we never speak anymore. And, lest you think she is super intelligent from that one piece of wisdom her other favourite saying was "you can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can't wipe your friends under the couch."
Yep. Whatever!
Happy long weekend.
Wednesday, August 02, 2006
Hurry hurry get the firetucks - ding ding ding ding ding!
Last night Mike and I were again doing more taping for this show I keep talking about. It's actually becoming fun now that we're not terrified of the camera, we are used to people in our home and we feel like there is actually a point to what we are doing.
And, the other perk of this is that it requires us to do some taping minus Matty. And my sister has been kind enough to host a couple of sleepovers for Matthew on nights that we need to be in Toronto.
Last night was such a night.
When everyone left, Mike and I went on a late evening date which was pretty fun. We had pizza at 9:30! We just went to this little pizza place we love, and had a slice and chatted. Really, we rarely do this, we were starving, and it was fun. And, I even stayed up past my normal bed time!!!
Why?
Because Mike was going to drive me to work the next day which meant I got to sleep in till 6:30. In my world of 5:30 am alarms, sleeping in is a big deal. (as it is for everyone).
And then it happened.
At 5 am the fire alarm went off!!!
Of course. Why wouldn't a fire alarm go off when we get a chance to cuddle up and sleep an extra hour?
It's not that I mind fire alarms that much. In the middle of the day they are cool - Matthew would have been thrilled to see the truck, and being the amazing mom I am I truly would have made myself semi decent to bring my toddler to see the fire truck, but he wasn't there!!! Of all days.
But, I did find myself drawn to the windows to see the firetruck regardless.
I have no idea why the alarm went off.
My guess is that it was the humidity. When I was in highschool I was a waitress at a seniors residence. The alarms went off fairly frequently in the summer - and they always said it was due to the high humidity.
Funny how those alarms were way more thrilling than these alarms.
At the condo when the alarm goes off I inevitably go running to the closet to get decent clothes on (they never go off when I look decent), try to find the cat carrier to pack up Mojo if we have to leave, and make Matty a bottle or get a snack.
In high school it was a little different. All of the girls would run to the bathroom to make sure we looked decent, put on lipstick, and look as caring as we possibly could while waiting to run out and offer the firefighters cookies. Someone would always end up asking some sort of question to get them to stick around and eat the cookies. It was a wonderful thing.
This morning - not so much. It did, however, afford Mike and I the time to share a cup of coffee before heading off to work. So, in the end, it was worth it.
PS - that subject line is the title of my friend Salina's favourite song!!!
And, the other perk of this is that it requires us to do some taping minus Matty. And my sister has been kind enough to host a couple of sleepovers for Matthew on nights that we need to be in Toronto.
Last night was such a night.
When everyone left, Mike and I went on a late evening date which was pretty fun. We had pizza at 9:30! We just went to this little pizza place we love, and had a slice and chatted. Really, we rarely do this, we were starving, and it was fun. And, I even stayed up past my normal bed time!!!
Why?
Because Mike was going to drive me to work the next day which meant I got to sleep in till 6:30. In my world of 5:30 am alarms, sleeping in is a big deal. (as it is for everyone).
And then it happened.
At 5 am the fire alarm went off!!!
Of course. Why wouldn't a fire alarm go off when we get a chance to cuddle up and sleep an extra hour?
It's not that I mind fire alarms that much. In the middle of the day they are cool - Matthew would have been thrilled to see the truck, and being the amazing mom I am I truly would have made myself semi decent to bring my toddler to see the fire truck, but he wasn't there!!! Of all days.
But, I did find myself drawn to the windows to see the firetruck regardless.
I have no idea why the alarm went off.
My guess is that it was the humidity. When I was in highschool I was a waitress at a seniors residence. The alarms went off fairly frequently in the summer - and they always said it was due to the high humidity.
Funny how those alarms were way more thrilling than these alarms.
At the condo when the alarm goes off I inevitably go running to the closet to get decent clothes on (they never go off when I look decent), try to find the cat carrier to pack up Mojo if we have to leave, and make Matty a bottle or get a snack.
In high school it was a little different. All of the girls would run to the bathroom to make sure we looked decent, put on lipstick, and look as caring as we possibly could while waiting to run out and offer the firefighters cookies. Someone would always end up asking some sort of question to get them to stick around and eat the cookies. It was a wonderful thing.
This morning - not so much. It did, however, afford Mike and I the time to share a cup of coffee before heading off to work. So, in the end, it was worth it.
PS - that subject line is the title of my friend Salina's favourite song!!!
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Different babysitter - Day 1
Yesterday was day one of our teenage babysitter.
Why didn't I do this earlier? Seriously, after one day Mike and I decided that we most certainly are going to use babysitters more often. Why?
Okay - first of all, and most importantly, Matthew was happy.
Not that we knew that when we came home because he was asleep. He was curled up comfortably on the couch, sound asleep, listening to MuchMusic. I suppose some people may not enjoy the MuchMusic background, but seriously, in raising a child who is cool and fits in music appreciation is key, and quite honestly all he ever watches with us is Treehouse. Is it possible that she changed the channel after he fell asleep? Perhaps. But, I really get the impression that he was happy to watch her shows. (I shall now attempt to tell him we are watching "Erin's show" and turn on Much and see if that works.)
The other funny thing - he became addicted to the word "awesome" - he even had the tone of the word down. Adorable.
So, we made him corn last night and he sat eating it and said "Yummy corn is AWESOME".
Hilarious. He then proceeded to tell us everything else that was awesome.
And, on top of the fact that he was entertained, exhausted and saying new words, our house was clean! Seriously, she made his lunch and then she cleaned the whole kitchen and ran the dishwasher and then put everything away.
We were shocked.
I left her a note today to say how Matt was great and give her some cash for ice cream or something (I sort of forgot yesterday to do that - oops). I debated mentioning that there was no need to do dishes. But I thought better of it. I also thought better of making some helpful suggestions like laundry, vaccuuming ... I'm kidding of course.
Truthfully, I spent a few summers as a babysitter. It was pretty fun - and a lot of work. And, I usually did try to keep the house clean, do the dishes, etc. etc. But, I forgot about all of that - and I forgot how wonderful it is to have someone help with all of that.
It's really too bad I love daycare so much because I could totally go for having a nanny who kept the house kind of clean, ran the dishwasher, started dinner. My life would be so much easier.
Why didn't I do this earlier? Seriously, after one day Mike and I decided that we most certainly are going to use babysitters more often. Why?
Okay - first of all, and most importantly, Matthew was happy.
Not that we knew that when we came home because he was asleep. He was curled up comfortably on the couch, sound asleep, listening to MuchMusic. I suppose some people may not enjoy the MuchMusic background, but seriously, in raising a child who is cool and fits in music appreciation is key, and quite honestly all he ever watches with us is Treehouse. Is it possible that she changed the channel after he fell asleep? Perhaps. But, I really get the impression that he was happy to watch her shows. (I shall now attempt to tell him we are watching "Erin's show" and turn on Much and see if that works.)
The other funny thing - he became addicted to the word "awesome" - he even had the tone of the word down. Adorable.
So, we made him corn last night and he sat eating it and said "Yummy corn is AWESOME".
Hilarious. He then proceeded to tell us everything else that was awesome.
And, on top of the fact that he was entertained, exhausted and saying new words, our house was clean! Seriously, she made his lunch and then she cleaned the whole kitchen and ran the dishwasher and then put everything away.
We were shocked.
I left her a note today to say how Matt was great and give her some cash for ice cream or something (I sort of forgot yesterday to do that - oops). I debated mentioning that there was no need to do dishes. But I thought better of it. I also thought better of making some helpful suggestions like laundry, vaccuuming ... I'm kidding of course.
Truthfully, I spent a few summers as a babysitter. It was pretty fun - and a lot of work. And, I usually did try to keep the house clean, do the dishes, etc. etc. But, I forgot about all of that - and I forgot how wonderful it is to have someone help with all of that.
It's really too bad I love daycare so much because I could totally go for having a nanny who kept the house kind of clean, ran the dishwasher, started dinner. My life would be so much easier.
Monday, July 31, 2006
Just for the week ... I want to be Matty!
I've decided that as of this morning I want my son's life this week.
I know you think I'm kidding, but I'm not.
Since the daycare is closed we are in Oakville, and this is the week that Matthew is spending with my parents' teenage neighbour. Last night she and her mom came over to chat, to ask some questions about Matt's schedule, and to make sure that certain things were okay.
The conversation was a little along the lines of this.
Babysitter: Does Matty nap?
Laural: Only if he feels like it. If you think he needs a nap and he'll sleep, sure. Maybe he'll just want to hang out with a bottle and watch tv and that's cool. Up to you. (he hasn't really been napping consistently, why force it)
Babysitter: What does he eat
Laural: We have tons of stuff here - there's Kraft Dinner, etc that he can eat. He may only want fruit or chips. If you're happy and he's happy we're happy. So, whatever. If you want to eat at your house, he'll eat whatever.
Babysitter's mom: Can we have the car seat and take him swimming
Laural: Yes, here's his life jacket and swim diapers. Have fun.
Seriously, this week it's a week of fun. Not only does Matty love the people who are watching him (officially the teenager, but her mom is involved, and her 10 year old sister actually plays with him. Like, she takes him down slides, does underdoggies, etc.) but he's doing tons of fun stuff. Since the babysitter is next door he gets to sleep in. We bought all the yummy food he likes, he gets to go places in a van (which to him is incredibly exciting).
Wow.
And, to think that I was worried about this week. Really, I just want to be him.
I know you think I'm kidding, but I'm not.
Since the daycare is closed we are in Oakville, and this is the week that Matthew is spending with my parents' teenage neighbour. Last night she and her mom came over to chat, to ask some questions about Matt's schedule, and to make sure that certain things were okay.
The conversation was a little along the lines of this.
Babysitter: Does Matty nap?
Laural: Only if he feels like it. If you think he needs a nap and he'll sleep, sure. Maybe he'll just want to hang out with a bottle and watch tv and that's cool. Up to you. (he hasn't really been napping consistently, why force it)
Babysitter: What does he eat
Laural: We have tons of stuff here - there's Kraft Dinner, etc that he can eat. He may only want fruit or chips. If you're happy and he's happy we're happy. So, whatever. If you want to eat at your house, he'll eat whatever.
Babysitter's mom: Can we have the car seat and take him swimming
Laural: Yes, here's his life jacket and swim diapers. Have fun.
Seriously, this week it's a week of fun. Not only does Matty love the people who are watching him (officially the teenager, but her mom is involved, and her 10 year old sister actually plays with him. Like, she takes him down slides, does underdoggies, etc.) but he's doing tons of fun stuff. Since the babysitter is next door he gets to sleep in. We bought all the yummy food he likes, he gets to go places in a van (which to him is incredibly exciting).
Wow.
And, to think that I was worried about this week. Really, I just want to be him.
Sunday, July 30, 2006
Happy 30th Becky!
Yesterday I had a semi-surprise birthday party for me sister.
For thse who don't know her, she is my complete opposite. We are 20 months apart, and as different as you could imagine. Where I am chubby, dark haired and very talkative, my sister is skinny, has curly red hair and is reserved.
So, when planning a birthday for her I had to do the complete opposite of what I would want, while still making sure that it was something that had my signature on it.
So ...
Yesterday I invited her 4 closest friends over and we had an in-home spa pedicure party.
It was a ton of fun.
What I told her was that there was nothing to be stressed about, to wear jeans, be relaxed and look forward to a good day. I didn't tell her who I was inviting, so when she came in she was surprised by who was there. It had taken a bit of advance planning because everyone there has kids under the age of 4 (Kyla, Becky's daughter is the oldest and she just turned 4), and we all had to get our husbands to babysit on a Saturday.
But, we pulled it off.
And, for just over 4 hours we sat around sipping coffee, eating junk food and being pampered. It was a pretty fun way to welcome in the next decade of my sister's life.
Plus, we all kind of needed it. I really think there's nothing better than sitting with a group of friends and just chatting about what's going on in life - to share the highlights and the lowlights, to get advice and share advice. We talked about everything from biting to husbands to kids to movies.
As far as the actual pedicure thing. That, too, is a cool story. The woman who arranged it all has an 18 month old, and she runs this business out of her home because she wants to spend more time with her daughter. I found her through a web site about mom businesses, and to me it seemed perfect to get someone who also was a mom. You know - my issue - support other moms as much as possible.
Not only was she really cool and friendly, but she also added to the conversation. Actually, I will put a link to her site because she was good, and she had great prices and really nice - I would totally use her again.
Happy birthday Becky!
For thse who don't know her, she is my complete opposite. We are 20 months apart, and as different as you could imagine. Where I am chubby, dark haired and very talkative, my sister is skinny, has curly red hair and is reserved.
So, when planning a birthday for her I had to do the complete opposite of what I would want, while still making sure that it was something that had my signature on it.
So ...
Yesterday I invited her 4 closest friends over and we had an in-home spa pedicure party.
It was a ton of fun.
What I told her was that there was nothing to be stressed about, to wear jeans, be relaxed and look forward to a good day. I didn't tell her who I was inviting, so when she came in she was surprised by who was there. It had taken a bit of advance planning because everyone there has kids under the age of 4 (Kyla, Becky's daughter is the oldest and she just turned 4), and we all had to get our husbands to babysit on a Saturday.
But, we pulled it off.
And, for just over 4 hours we sat around sipping coffee, eating junk food and being pampered. It was a pretty fun way to welcome in the next decade of my sister's life.
Plus, we all kind of needed it. I really think there's nothing better than sitting with a group of friends and just chatting about what's going on in life - to share the highlights and the lowlights, to get advice and share advice. We talked about everything from biting to husbands to kids to movies.
As far as the actual pedicure thing. That, too, is a cool story. The woman who arranged it all has an 18 month old, and she runs this business out of her home because she wants to spend more time with her daughter. I found her through a web site about mom businesses, and to me it seemed perfect to get someone who also was a mom. You know - my issue - support other moms as much as possible.
Not only was she really cool and friendly, but she also added to the conversation. Actually, I will put a link to her site because she was good, and she had great prices and really nice - I would totally use her again.
Happy birthday Becky!
Friday, July 28, 2006
The Ups and Downs
This month has been, by far, one of the craziest on record for me. At least one of the craziest since having Matt - where I have tried to be relatively stable, sane and consistent.
But, we knew that this month would bring sheer insanity to our lives, and it truly has.
A rundown of these past 4 weeks are:
Week 1) Family trip to Vermont
Week 2) Laural away for work
Week 3) Daycare closed, living with Grandma and Grandpa in Oakville while simoultaneously taping a television show in Toronto (current week)
Week 4) Daycare still closed, living at Grandma and Grandpa's house while they are on vacation and Matt is being taken care of by a babysitter, more show taping, etc.
Add to this that we are trying to live on a cash budget (don't get me started) and we are trying to not fight, and make it to work on time every day.
It's a little crazy.
But, that's not what this is about.
This is about my monkey. Because he is in the middle of the upheaval. And, he is doing great. Last night Mike said to me that he wishes he could be as strong as our two-year old. And, he's right.
While we are stressing about everything, Matthew just takes things a day at a time. His time with Grandpa has been an adventure. Together they have built a set of steps in the backyard (Matt truly helped by handing my dad nails and stuff), going to playgrounds, having ice cream, etc. He's stayed with a friend of the family, with my sister and with my parents.
And throughout it all he's been happy and smiling and excited to tell us about his day. And, in the last few weeks he has started talking a lot more. Like, he can express himself in full sentences, and he jokes about stuff. It's hilarious.
And then there was last night. He and I went to bed at the same time - 9:30. Mike had been lying down with him and then I got myself ready and came to join them. We all laid there quietly, listening to Matt's tape. And, then Matt reached over, gave me a big hug and patted me on the back. It was a moment to cherish.
I love that child.
But, we knew that this month would bring sheer insanity to our lives, and it truly has.
A rundown of these past 4 weeks are:
Week 1) Family trip to Vermont
Week 2) Laural away for work
Week 3) Daycare closed, living with Grandma and Grandpa in Oakville while simoultaneously taping a television show in Toronto (current week)
Week 4) Daycare still closed, living at Grandma and Grandpa's house while they are on vacation and Matt is being taken care of by a babysitter, more show taping, etc.
Add to this that we are trying to live on a cash budget (don't get me started) and we are trying to not fight, and make it to work on time every day.
It's a little crazy.
But, that's not what this is about.
This is about my monkey. Because he is in the middle of the upheaval. And, he is doing great. Last night Mike said to me that he wishes he could be as strong as our two-year old. And, he's right.
While we are stressing about everything, Matthew just takes things a day at a time. His time with Grandpa has been an adventure. Together they have built a set of steps in the backyard (Matt truly helped by handing my dad nails and stuff), going to playgrounds, having ice cream, etc. He's stayed with a friend of the family, with my sister and with my parents.
And throughout it all he's been happy and smiling and excited to tell us about his day. And, in the last few weeks he has started talking a lot more. Like, he can express himself in full sentences, and he jokes about stuff. It's hilarious.
And then there was last night. He and I went to bed at the same time - 9:30. Mike had been lying down with him and then I got myself ready and came to join them. We all laid there quietly, listening to Matt's tape. And, then Matt reached over, gave me a big hug and patted me on the back. It was a moment to cherish.
I love that child.
Thursday, July 27, 2006
The Great Daycare Debate
Recently I was talking with someone about daycare.
To me it's a bit of a ridiculous issue. The bottom line is that if you work your child needs to be taken care of. This is true until roughly the age of maybe 11 or 12. (maybe older). And, so the bottom line is that you have to have someone watch your child.
From what I understand there are a few options:
1) Your child goes to a daycare centre (public or private)
2) Your child goes to a home daycare
3) You have a nanny
4) Your child is with a family member
In some cases the decision is clear cut. Most of the people I know have a very strong opinion one way or another, or they are forced into a decision based on finances.
For Mike and I the choice was a daycare centre. We researched all of the options, went to see the various options and then made a choice. For us the choice was not so much of a financial one as it was a gut instinct.
I guess for me it boiled down to the fact that I felt, and still feel, that Matthew is a really high maintenance child. He needs constant entertainment and activity. After a day alone with him I am honestly tired. To me it was clear that he needed to be in a social setting and I truthfully wondered if one person could handle his energy day in and day out.
So I chose daycare. First he went to a privately run one (LOVED it - I still regularly e-mail them) and then when our situation changed he went to a municipal run daycare - love it too.
But, the other day I was speaking to someone who asked me about my choice.
Don't get me wrong, I wasn't offended, but I was annoyed. The gist of the conversation was that the daycare centres are for those of us who don't make enough of an income to hire a good nanny. Really.
I have to say I was taken aback by that.
I know lots of kids who had nannies. I grew up in private school and trust me, I had friends whose nannies picked them up every day, took us places, and all sorts of stuff. Some were nice, some were mean. Some were just okay. But, I never thought of it as a priviledge of the rich. It was just a lifestyle.
But, to even insinuate that I made a choice for my child based on finances? Not cool.
I mean, really.
I would pretty much do whatever I need to in order for Matty to be a happy well adjusted child. If it meant going into debt (well, further who am I kidding), or anything I'd do it. But, I'm happy with my choice. And, I think it is right. Financial issues or not.
Seriously, make decisions, choose what is best for your family. But, don't judge it's stupid. If you're happy with your nanny be glad that my kid goes to daycare because it means I won't steal your nanny!!!!
To me it's a bit of a ridiculous issue. The bottom line is that if you work your child needs to be taken care of. This is true until roughly the age of maybe 11 or 12. (maybe older). And, so the bottom line is that you have to have someone watch your child.
From what I understand there are a few options:
1) Your child goes to a daycare centre (public or private)
2) Your child goes to a home daycare
3) You have a nanny
4) Your child is with a family member
In some cases the decision is clear cut. Most of the people I know have a very strong opinion one way or another, or they are forced into a decision based on finances.
For Mike and I the choice was a daycare centre. We researched all of the options, went to see the various options and then made a choice. For us the choice was not so much of a financial one as it was a gut instinct.
I guess for me it boiled down to the fact that I felt, and still feel, that Matthew is a really high maintenance child. He needs constant entertainment and activity. After a day alone with him I am honestly tired. To me it was clear that he needed to be in a social setting and I truthfully wondered if one person could handle his energy day in and day out.
So I chose daycare. First he went to a privately run one (LOVED it - I still regularly e-mail them) and then when our situation changed he went to a municipal run daycare - love it too.
But, the other day I was speaking to someone who asked me about my choice.
Don't get me wrong, I wasn't offended, but I was annoyed. The gist of the conversation was that the daycare centres are for those of us who don't make enough of an income to hire a good nanny. Really.
I have to say I was taken aback by that.
I know lots of kids who had nannies. I grew up in private school and trust me, I had friends whose nannies picked them up every day, took us places, and all sorts of stuff. Some were nice, some were mean. Some were just okay. But, I never thought of it as a priviledge of the rich. It was just a lifestyle.
But, to even insinuate that I made a choice for my child based on finances? Not cool.
I mean, really.
I would pretty much do whatever I need to in order for Matty to be a happy well adjusted child. If it meant going into debt (well, further who am I kidding), or anything I'd do it. But, I'm happy with my choice. And, I think it is right. Financial issues or not.
Seriously, make decisions, choose what is best for your family. But, don't judge it's stupid. If you're happy with your nanny be glad that my kid goes to daycare because it means I won't steal your nanny!!!!
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Where's the Line??
The other day Mike and I were sitting in a restaurant, on our own, enjoying a dinner alone. We don't do this often, and when we get the chance we like to enjoy it, and prefer not to be sitting around kids.
But, this particular evening we were. One family with kids was fine - nice, well behaved, etc. The other was not so nice.
It was a large group of adults (6) and one little boy, about Matty's age.
I don't know what this group was thinking. First of all, it was late, like 8:30 and he was tired. Like, the kid was cranky, but the parents/friends just kept socializing. Okay - I get that. But, then they started doing to most annoying thing - they kept doing some weird surprise thing that made him scream.
It wasn't a cute laugh he was emitting. It was a stupid annoying shrieking scream that made them all laugh and then he would laugh and do it again.
Here's the thing.
My son is not a perfect angel, and sadly when he walks into a restaurant he doesn't suddenly become one. But, we always encourage good behaviour. If he starts having a meltdown/temper tantrum we do something about it - whether it's try to give him crayons, take him away from the table or sing a song.
But we would never, ever encourage him to do something so annoying and stupid that annoys an entire restaurant.
Don't get me wrong. I have a ton of sympathy for parents who are trying. I am not the person who stares other patrons down or gives advice (I have shared toys, but in a friendly way). But for parents like that I have to say something.
I mean, grow up. What are you thinking? Not only is your kid REALLY annoying - you are giving other parents a bad name. And you are making your kid look like a total brat.
In the end my stares did nothing. Mike gave 0ne menacing glare and the mom shut the kid up.
Really!
But, this particular evening we were. One family with kids was fine - nice, well behaved, etc. The other was not so nice.
It was a large group of adults (6) and one little boy, about Matty's age.
I don't know what this group was thinking. First of all, it was late, like 8:30 and he was tired. Like, the kid was cranky, but the parents/friends just kept socializing. Okay - I get that. But, then they started doing to most annoying thing - they kept doing some weird surprise thing that made him scream.
It wasn't a cute laugh he was emitting. It was a stupid annoying shrieking scream that made them all laugh and then he would laugh and do it again.
Here's the thing.
My son is not a perfect angel, and sadly when he walks into a restaurant he doesn't suddenly become one. But, we always encourage good behaviour. If he starts having a meltdown/temper tantrum we do something about it - whether it's try to give him crayons, take him away from the table or sing a song.
But we would never, ever encourage him to do something so annoying and stupid that annoys an entire restaurant.
Don't get me wrong. I have a ton of sympathy for parents who are trying. I am not the person who stares other patrons down or gives advice (I have shared toys, but in a friendly way). But for parents like that I have to say something.
I mean, grow up. What are you thinking? Not only is your kid REALLY annoying - you are giving other parents a bad name. And you are making your kid look like a total brat.
In the end my stares did nothing. Mike gave 0ne menacing glare and the mom shut the kid up.
Really!
Saturday, July 22, 2006
Home Sweet Home
I'm home ... at last.
It's been a long week. It was fun, I saw a lot of incredible things, I spent a lot of time with people I wouldn't normally have spent time with. And, I went to places that I know I would never have and probably never will again.
It was wonderful (and tiring) and I am so glad to be home.
The coolest moment ever was when I arrived back at the airport, trudging all of my luggage, and there were the boys. Mike dressed up for the occassion - not in a suit or anything, but in the shirt he knows I love, his nice shoes and khakis and did his hair. Matty had on his "mom rocks" shirt. And, I went over and of course I cried. And, then Matt cried. And, maybe even Mike had a tear. It was pretty sweet.
It was a moment I will cherish.
And, it's so good to be back.
Tomorrow though we leave again. We are going to stay at my parents' place since Matthew's daycare will be closed for two weeks. (I HATE that they close in the summer - next year we will plan vacation around that). Next week my family is taking care of him. The week after we have hired a babysitter. She's 17, Matthew and my nieces love her. And, ironically, I used to babysit her. I know it's trusting to leave a two year old with a teenage for a week but I know her entire family, I trust her completely and her mom is amazing and will be around. So, if there are any issues they will be there.
And then on top of all of this is the added fact that we got accepted to be on a reality tv show (I know - crazy) and so we are shooting for that A LOT. We're a little busy.
It's been a long week. It was fun, I saw a lot of incredible things, I spent a lot of time with people I wouldn't normally have spent time with. And, I went to places that I know I would never have and probably never will again.
It was wonderful (and tiring) and I am so glad to be home.
The coolest moment ever was when I arrived back at the airport, trudging all of my luggage, and there were the boys. Mike dressed up for the occassion - not in a suit or anything, but in the shirt he knows I love, his nice shoes and khakis and did his hair. Matty had on his "mom rocks" shirt. And, I went over and of course I cried. And, then Matt cried. And, maybe even Mike had a tear. It was pretty sweet.
It was a moment I will cherish.
And, it's so good to be back.
Tomorrow though we leave again. We are going to stay at my parents' place since Matthew's daycare will be closed for two weeks. (I HATE that they close in the summer - next year we will plan vacation around that). Next week my family is taking care of him. The week after we have hired a babysitter. She's 17, Matthew and my nieces love her. And, ironically, I used to babysit her. I know it's trusting to leave a two year old with a teenage for a week but I know her entire family, I trust her completely and her mom is amazing and will be around. So, if there are any issues they will be there.
And then on top of all of this is the added fact that we got accepted to be on a reality tv show (I know - crazy) and so we are shooting for that A LOT. We're a little busy.
Thursday, July 20, 2006
Almost Home Time
Tomorrow I go home.
I can't wait.
This trip has been pretty incredible on several levels. I have loved some parts and other parts were more tiring. But, it's been great.
And, I have realized a few things.
I've realized that I can be away from Matthew. It sucks and I miss him, but it's okay and we are surviving.
I've realized that I miss my husband. A lot. I just do. The Dixie Chicks (sad I know) have this line in a song that talks about sharing silences. I miss the quiet where we can be quiet together without words and be comfortable. Weird. Cause I like to talk.
I am above all looking forward to coming home and being met at the airport by my boys. I really am.
Am I homesick. Sort of kind of. It's more like I'm just ready to be home - soon ...
But for now I'm relishing the moment and not complaining.
I can't wait.
This trip has been pretty incredible on several levels. I have loved some parts and other parts were more tiring. But, it's been great.
And, I have realized a few things.
I've realized that I can be away from Matthew. It sucks and I miss him, but it's okay and we are surviving.
I've realized that I miss my husband. A lot. I just do. The Dixie Chicks (sad I know) have this line in a song that talks about sharing silences. I miss the quiet where we can be quiet together without words and be comfortable. Weird. Cause I like to talk.
I am above all looking forward to coming home and being met at the airport by my boys. I really am.
Am I homesick. Sort of kind of. It's more like I'm just ready to be home - soon ...
But for now I'm relishing the moment and not complaining.
Monday, July 17, 2006
Missing Home
Yesterday I embarked on my frist trip away from my baby.
It's been two years since I've spent more than a night away from my son and it is hard.
I'm away in Calgary on a work trip.
There are some good things. The first thing is that the flight was good, the hotel last night was great and so far the trip has run smoothly. I know that I will see a lot and learn a lot and generally it will be a good experience. I know all of this. And I am embracing it.
But, I also miss home.
I miss both of my boys. I miss their cuddles and their hugs. I missed picking Matt up at daycare today and getting the cry of "mommy mommy mommy" I always get.
Last night I felt weird when I woke up in the middle of the night and Mike wasn't there. It was weird. And, it was kind of empty.
But, I think it's also good. It's nice to miss them. It's nice to know I am missed. it was nice to get a card that Mike wrote but Matt picked (with Dora on it).And I think that you don't realize how much you love people till you miss them.
And, Friday will come soon.
Until then I will embrace the moment and the opportunity.
It's been two years since I've spent more than a night away from my son and it is hard.
I'm away in Calgary on a work trip.
There are some good things. The first thing is that the flight was good, the hotel last night was great and so far the trip has run smoothly. I know that I will see a lot and learn a lot and generally it will be a good experience. I know all of this. And I am embracing it.
But, I also miss home.
I miss both of my boys. I miss their cuddles and their hugs. I missed picking Matt up at daycare today and getting the cry of "mommy mommy mommy" I always get.
Last night I felt weird when I woke up in the middle of the night and Mike wasn't there. It was weird. And, it was kind of empty.
But, I think it's also good. It's nice to miss them. It's nice to know I am missed. it was nice to get a card that Mike wrote but Matt picked (with Dora on it).And I think that you don't realize how much you love people till you miss them.
And, Friday will come soon.
Until then I will embrace the moment and the opportunity.
Friday, July 14, 2006
A Break ...
This week we took a break from everything: from work, from home, from the city, from blogging, from e-mail (including my blackberry!) in order to re-group and have a vacation.
Reading my last post I realized I was exhausted and needed to just seperate from all the crap that comes from a dizzying life. And, it was the perfect time to shut all of that off and go away.
So away we went, to the peaceful state of Vermont.
It's not the first time we have been there. My parents have been taking my sister and I since I was about 6. We go to the same places and do the same things, but being in the fresh mountain air and just doing things like going for walks, drives, etc is actually pretty refreshing.
This year we went with my parents, my sister, her husband and her 2 daughters. So, it was a full house with Mike, Matthew and I.
Matty and his cousins played. Kyla is 4 and Paige is almost 1. (they are all spaced out by 18 months). So, it was an interesting mix. One second Matt and Kyla were playing the next they were screaming. And, Paige sort of just watched it all and joined in when she could.
There were definite highs and lows. Matthew was insane. He's 2. what could we expect? It's a little bit difficult to take a toddler out of the routine he has and put him into a new one and now have any major meltdowns. So, we had a few. But, in the end he seemed pretty okay with it all and loved being with Grandma and Grandpa so much. Every morning he would get out of bed and run yelling "Gawamma - Gawampa" and find them and hop in their bed and cuddle (we had a chalet so there was lots of space) and then usually Kyla and/or Paige joined in.
For me, it was a nice chance to get a break. And, to spend some time with my boys. Mike and I had our 5th anniversary last week. And, I can't say it's been the easiest of times in our marriage. (that's as much as I will blog about).We've struggled. So, we alternated between being close and being distant and even some screaming. Not sure if that's good or bad, but I do come from the school of thought that unless you express the good and the bad there will be no future. So we rode it out and we needed a bit of that.
And, I got a lot of Matty time.
This is the first week off that I have had since I started work that was actual vacation. I took time off at Christmas, but it was for doing Christmas stuff. And, I took a week off to move but we were integrating Matt into a new daycare (which we promplty took him out of - other story) but we hdan't just taken a week to chill. So, thankfully this was that week. And, it's perfect timing because next week I will be away for a week - on my own - for the first time away from Matt. So, I kind of cherished this time.
I also realized that any vision I had of being a stay at home mom was crazy because I COULD NOT HACK IT!!! I was so ready for the daycare gods to descend once again and take care of and entertian my constantly active child.
Yikes.
So, fun filled!
Pictures to come.
Reading my last post I realized I was exhausted and needed to just seperate from all the crap that comes from a dizzying life. And, it was the perfect time to shut all of that off and go away.
So away we went, to the peaceful state of Vermont.
It's not the first time we have been there. My parents have been taking my sister and I since I was about 6. We go to the same places and do the same things, but being in the fresh mountain air and just doing things like going for walks, drives, etc is actually pretty refreshing.
This year we went with my parents, my sister, her husband and her 2 daughters. So, it was a full house with Mike, Matthew and I.
Matty and his cousins played. Kyla is 4 and Paige is almost 1. (they are all spaced out by 18 months). So, it was an interesting mix. One second Matt and Kyla were playing the next they were screaming. And, Paige sort of just watched it all and joined in when she could.
There were definite highs and lows. Matthew was insane. He's 2. what could we expect? It's a little bit difficult to take a toddler out of the routine he has and put him into a new one and now have any major meltdowns. So, we had a few. But, in the end he seemed pretty okay with it all and loved being with Grandma and Grandpa so much. Every morning he would get out of bed and run yelling "Gawamma - Gawampa" and find them and hop in their bed and cuddle (we had a chalet so there was lots of space) and then usually Kyla and/or Paige joined in.
For me, it was a nice chance to get a break. And, to spend some time with my boys. Mike and I had our 5th anniversary last week. And, I can't say it's been the easiest of times in our marriage. (that's as much as I will blog about).We've struggled. So, we alternated between being close and being distant and even some screaming. Not sure if that's good or bad, but I do come from the school of thought that unless you express the good and the bad there will be no future. So we rode it out and we needed a bit of that.
And, I got a lot of Matty time.
This is the first week off that I have had since I started work that was actual vacation. I took time off at Christmas, but it was for doing Christmas stuff. And, I took a week off to move but we were integrating Matt into a new daycare (which we promplty took him out of - other story) but we hdan't just taken a week to chill. So, thankfully this was that week. And, it's perfect timing because next week I will be away for a week - on my own - for the first time away from Matt. So, I kind of cherished this time.
I also realized that any vision I had of being a stay at home mom was crazy because I COULD NOT HACK IT!!! I was so ready for the daycare gods to descend once again and take care of and entertian my constantly active child.
Yikes.
So, fun filled!
Pictures to come.
Friday, July 07, 2006
My Unabashed Life as a Drama Queen
I've been wanting to write a post about this for awhile, but it didn't all come together in my head until last night.
My entire life I have had the title drma queen. I don't know who first said it, quite possibly my mother when I was a toddler. But the name, or some version of it, has stuck with me. Last night I was out with some colleagues, and after a particularly dramatic week in the world of office gossip, I got given this name ... again.
It was well deserved. I admit.
But that's not exactly what this post is about.
This post is more about me, and how I realized this week that I live in the drama of life. I do. I relish it - and I push for it. And, then I go out and live in all the highs and lows that this drama brings. I wish I could figure out why.
On the one hand I would love it if I could be like so many people who are content - who go to work every day and take their coffee breaks at 10 am and their lunch at noon and go home at five. I envy that desire for the constant and the serene. But I don't have that desire.
And, I think I'm struggling with that right now.
I mean, how can you be a good mom and a good wife and also thrive on the drama of life?
I've often thought about the post-partum, pre-blogging days when I was going through post-partum depression - not my favourite topic. I have been really trying to figure out where that came from and why. If you do research, or talk to your doctor (which of course I did) you know there are many sources. It's chemical but it's also situational. For me it was a combo.
But, I wonder if a huge part of it is all about this thing about me - that I live between the highs and the lows.
Before I had Matt, I was so excited. And, then you have this baby and it really sucks. I'm sorry, but it does. And, something that I am learning about my personality is that if I build something up and get really excited about it, I create almost a euphoric high for myself. And then, if the situation doesn't pan out it is a disastrous low. Hence the title drama queen. But, also hence the ppd. I think I completely fell apart because I was expecting a high - and I think I truly thought in my deepest of thoughts, that I would be one of those aforementioned serenity seeking people who cherished the role of motherhood, the joys of the everyday, quiet walks with my baby in his stroller, etc etc. And, when that didn't happen ...
WOW!
I fell to pieces.
And, I am still gathering those pieces two years later. So, as for my life as a drama queen ...
Well, I don't know.
Do I continue to live in the highs and the lows? I think so. Because I don't think that my personality will allow me to do anything but.
But, really, sometimes that really sucks.
My entire life I have had the title drma queen. I don't know who first said it, quite possibly my mother when I was a toddler. But the name, or some version of it, has stuck with me. Last night I was out with some colleagues, and after a particularly dramatic week in the world of office gossip, I got given this name ... again.
It was well deserved. I admit.
But that's not exactly what this post is about.
This post is more about me, and how I realized this week that I live in the drama of life. I do. I relish it - and I push for it. And, then I go out and live in all the highs and lows that this drama brings. I wish I could figure out why.
On the one hand I would love it if I could be like so many people who are content - who go to work every day and take their coffee breaks at 10 am and their lunch at noon and go home at five. I envy that desire for the constant and the serene. But I don't have that desire.
And, I think I'm struggling with that right now.
I mean, how can you be a good mom and a good wife and also thrive on the drama of life?
I've often thought about the post-partum, pre-blogging days when I was going through post-partum depression - not my favourite topic. I have been really trying to figure out where that came from and why. If you do research, or talk to your doctor (which of course I did) you know there are many sources. It's chemical but it's also situational. For me it was a combo.
But, I wonder if a huge part of it is all about this thing about me - that I live between the highs and the lows.
Before I had Matt, I was so excited. And, then you have this baby and it really sucks. I'm sorry, but it does. And, something that I am learning about my personality is that if I build something up and get really excited about it, I create almost a euphoric high for myself. And then, if the situation doesn't pan out it is a disastrous low. Hence the title drama queen. But, also hence the ppd. I think I completely fell apart because I was expecting a high - and I think I truly thought in my deepest of thoughts, that I would be one of those aforementioned serenity seeking people who cherished the role of motherhood, the joys of the everyday, quiet walks with my baby in his stroller, etc etc. And, when that didn't happen ...
WOW!
I fell to pieces.
And, I am still gathering those pieces two years later. So, as for my life as a drama queen ...
Well, I don't know.
Do I continue to live in the highs and the lows? I think so. Because I don't think that my personality will allow me to do anything but.
But, really, sometimes that really sucks.
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
A Reflection on Someone Else's Post
Today I read a post about the battle between staying at home and working and the conflict that arises. I'm putting a link here because I honestly could never say all that Her Bad Mother says in such an eloquent and educated way. http://badladies.blogspot.com/
Read it. It's amazing.
It made me want to say a lot.
It made me re-visit my decision to go back to work, the motivation behind it, and really how I am feeling now.
I have been at my current job for a year. This week I had my "anniversary". To me it's a big deal. Not so much the one-year thing, but just that I survived. I didn't think I had it in me. I didn't think I had one week in me.
Last July I sat on the GO train crying, waving goodbye to my baby and my husband, praying that I would make it through the first scary day at work without bursting into tears.
My friend Stef rode her bike down and got me through lunch (her words "you can cry or laugh - I'll do either with you. Which would you prefer" were the best).
And here I am a year later.
I've survived. And I'm happy. And so is Mike and so is Matty.
Matthew is no longer a baby. He is a toddler. He runs and plays and sings and talks and goes full time to daycare and he loves it.
But, this working thing is also really stressful. It it sucks to get up at 5:22 each morning to be out the door by 7. It sucks to sometimes have to deal with the crap that work can throw at you, to decide whether or not to partake in office gossip (and trust me, there is some good office gossip!!!). But, for me the decision was a good one.
Why?
Because I didn't feel fulfilled when I stayed at home. I was me, but a different version of me. I was the me who didn't feel like she fit in with the other moms, who was constantlly comparing herself with the others and who was floundering. The days were so long and I wasn't treasuring motherhood. I was counting the minutes till nap time and then counting the minutes till Mike was done working. My eye was always on the clock and I just wasn't dealing with it. And, believe me, Matt didn't have a happy mom. He had an aggravated, annoyed and tired mom, who was annoyed a lot.
On a visit to my doctor (I love her) she asked me about my work plans. I basically told her all of the stuff I was dealing with and she told me exactly what I needed to hear. It's okay to do what I want, that I will still be a good mom if I work and that everyone is happier when the mom is happier.
And I listened because she really is smart. And she is cool. And, if she weren't my doctor I would probably want to have a couple of drinks with her - that cool.
Oh - and there was also the financial issue that we were going broke!!
So I went back to work.
It was hard, but it was also good. I had my name restored. I was Laural Adams, not Mom or Mommy all day every day. When I said something it meant something (well, kind of ) and people actually let me fit in.
In the past year I've made friends and gotten to know some great people. I've done some bizarre activities (like riding a 20 person bike around Toronto, building stuff out of food, focus groups ...). I have laughed till I cried and I've learned to stand up for myself on issues. I've been acknowledged for hard work, and I've been rewarded for doing a good job.
I know - it's not always peachy. Work is still work. But, at the end of the day I think it's been the right thing for me to do.
My favourite part of the day is when I pick Matt up at daycare and he comes running over and gives me a huge hug. In his own way he gets it. Kids know when you are happy and when you aren't. And, I think he knows I'm pretty happy.
So, yep, Bad Mother is right. It's not about whether it's better to be a stay at home mom or a working mom. It's not really an issue of being a feminist. It's about doing what is right for you and accepting that what your choice is is what it is. And, if someone doesn't get it, or if someone thinks you are wrong well then they can deal with it.
My guess - they are still trying to figure out what they really want in life.
Read it. It's amazing.
It made me want to say a lot.
It made me re-visit my decision to go back to work, the motivation behind it, and really how I am feeling now.
I have been at my current job for a year. This week I had my "anniversary". To me it's a big deal. Not so much the one-year thing, but just that I survived. I didn't think I had it in me. I didn't think I had one week in me.
Last July I sat on the GO train crying, waving goodbye to my baby and my husband, praying that I would make it through the first scary day at work without bursting into tears.
My friend Stef rode her bike down and got me through lunch (her words "you can cry or laugh - I'll do either with you. Which would you prefer" were the best).
And here I am a year later.
I've survived. And I'm happy. And so is Mike and so is Matty.
Matthew is no longer a baby. He is a toddler. He runs and plays and sings and talks and goes full time to daycare and he loves it.
But, this working thing is also really stressful. It it sucks to get up at 5:22 each morning to be out the door by 7. It sucks to sometimes have to deal with the crap that work can throw at you, to decide whether or not to partake in office gossip (and trust me, there is some good office gossip!!!). But, for me the decision was a good one.
Why?
Because I didn't feel fulfilled when I stayed at home. I was me, but a different version of me. I was the me who didn't feel like she fit in with the other moms, who was constantlly comparing herself with the others and who was floundering. The days were so long and I wasn't treasuring motherhood. I was counting the minutes till nap time and then counting the minutes till Mike was done working. My eye was always on the clock and I just wasn't dealing with it. And, believe me, Matt didn't have a happy mom. He had an aggravated, annoyed and tired mom, who was annoyed a lot.
On a visit to my doctor (I love her) she asked me about my work plans. I basically told her all of the stuff I was dealing with and she told me exactly what I needed to hear. It's okay to do what I want, that I will still be a good mom if I work and that everyone is happier when the mom is happier.
And I listened because she really is smart. And she is cool. And, if she weren't my doctor I would probably want to have a couple of drinks with her - that cool.
Oh - and there was also the financial issue that we were going broke!!
So I went back to work.
It was hard, but it was also good. I had my name restored. I was Laural Adams, not Mom or Mommy all day every day. When I said something it meant something (well, kind of ) and people actually let me fit in.
In the past year I've made friends and gotten to know some great people. I've done some bizarre activities (like riding a 20 person bike around Toronto, building stuff out of food, focus groups ...). I have laughed till I cried and I've learned to stand up for myself on issues. I've been acknowledged for hard work, and I've been rewarded for doing a good job.
I know - it's not always peachy. Work is still work. But, at the end of the day I think it's been the right thing for me to do.
My favourite part of the day is when I pick Matt up at daycare and he comes running over and gives me a huge hug. In his own way he gets it. Kids know when you are happy and when you aren't. And, I think he knows I'm pretty happy.
So, yep, Bad Mother is right. It's not about whether it's better to be a stay at home mom or a working mom. It's not really an issue of being a feminist. It's about doing what is right for you and accepting that what your choice is is what it is. And, if someone doesn't get it, or if someone thinks you are wrong well then they can deal with it.
My guess - they are still trying to figure out what they really want in life.
Tuesday, July 04, 2006
We have Found Nemo!
Throughout the last two years of Matthew's life, little has held his interest in the way of television.
He has his favourite shows, and Treehouse is a constant in our life, I will admit. But, there's never been a show that he just sits and watches.
We tried Baby Einstein. This started around the crawling days, when we were attempting to sell our condo and I would madly clean while Matt sat in the exersaucer (jumped in the exersaucer), ate his baby mum mums and bounced around to the music.
Never in a million years would I have left him alone with Baby Einstein sans mum mums and exersaucer because he was not that enthralled.
As he got older he developed a bit of a crush on Dora. He still loves Dora. But, again, this is not a sitting show. He likes to catch the stars, dance with her and tell Swiper not to swipe, but this is not a show he'll sit still for.
Same with Bob the Builder and Thomas. Loves them. Knows the names of all the characters, but they are mere background noise - something to talk about and play about.
But this weekend we discovered Nemo.
I'm not sure if this is an age thing (now that he has reached 2.25 years) or whether it's just the Disney geniuses, but Matty Matt is completely enthralled by Nemo.
We watch it every day. Three days in a row Nemo has come on.
We have laughed, we have cried, we have cuddled.
Never before have I seen my child so enthralled by a character on television. When the sharks try to eat Marlin and Dory Matt screams "uh oh - Nemo" (he doesn't understand that Nemo and his dad are 2 different fish). When they show Darla holding a dead goldfish he shrieks in horror.
But, he loves it.
The second time we played it - we turned it off before bedtime. (He doesn't sit for the full length of the movie). And, then once we thought he was asleep I turned it back on to watch the ending. Matt came running out of his room screaming "I hear Nemo".
He was right. He did.
How could I deprive my child? I let him sit up till 9:00 watching the end of the movie. It was good. I think we both cried. And there was lots of cuddling. It was a long weekend. Who cares.
And so I think we have a new friend.
His name is Nemo.
He has his favourite shows, and Treehouse is a constant in our life, I will admit. But, there's never been a show that he just sits and watches.
We tried Baby Einstein. This started around the crawling days, when we were attempting to sell our condo and I would madly clean while Matt sat in the exersaucer (jumped in the exersaucer), ate his baby mum mums and bounced around to the music.
Never in a million years would I have left him alone with Baby Einstein sans mum mums and exersaucer because he was not that enthralled.
As he got older he developed a bit of a crush on Dora. He still loves Dora. But, again, this is not a sitting show. He likes to catch the stars, dance with her and tell Swiper not to swipe, but this is not a show he'll sit still for.
Same with Bob the Builder and Thomas. Loves them. Knows the names of all the characters, but they are mere background noise - something to talk about and play about.
But this weekend we discovered Nemo.
I'm not sure if this is an age thing (now that he has reached 2.25 years) or whether it's just the Disney geniuses, but Matty Matt is completely enthralled by Nemo.
We watch it every day. Three days in a row Nemo has come on.
We have laughed, we have cried, we have cuddled.
Never before have I seen my child so enthralled by a character on television. When the sharks try to eat Marlin and Dory Matt screams "uh oh - Nemo" (he doesn't understand that Nemo and his dad are 2 different fish). When they show Darla holding a dead goldfish he shrieks in horror.
But, he loves it.
The second time we played it - we turned it off before bedtime. (He doesn't sit for the full length of the movie). And, then once we thought he was asleep I turned it back on to watch the ending. Matt came running out of his room screaming "I hear Nemo".
He was right. He did.
How could I deprive my child? I let him sit up till 9:00 watching the end of the movie. It was good. I think we both cried. And there was lots of cuddling. It was a long weekend. Who cares.
And so I think we have a new friend.
His name is Nemo.
Monday, July 03, 2006
I did it!!!
I started trying to lose weight the Monday after Mother's Day.
I decided to set both long and short term goals. My short term goal - to lose 20 pounds before our trip to Vermont in July. I had a couple of reasons for this. The first was because I really wanted something achievable. The second ws because last time we went to Vermont I was so unhappy with my weight. I hated how I looked and I hate all the picture with me in them. I felt so out of control food wise. I wanted this year to be different.
And I did it!
I weighed myself today I have actually lost 21.5 pounds.
I did something else pretty cool today. I set my goal weight. This is something I've been avoiding, but I realized that if I put my mind to it I can hit that weight I have in my head. I have done it before, so screw my fears that I can't because I've had a baby. I've put my mind to it and I am doing it!!
As for another 20 pound goal ...
I'm not sure.
We're looking ahead to an extremely busy month of travelling, staying in Oakville for a bit and having alternate babysitters while our daycare is closed (a whole other post all of its own). I think my main goal - and my doctor would LOVE this one - is to stick with it and to not let stress ruin what I am doing. Because according to her the reason that I do overeat is, all thyroid issues aside, because I eat when I am stressed.
So, here we go again.
So, cheers to me and feeling better about myself :)
I decided to set both long and short term goals. My short term goal - to lose 20 pounds before our trip to Vermont in July. I had a couple of reasons for this. The first was because I really wanted something achievable. The second ws because last time we went to Vermont I was so unhappy with my weight. I hated how I looked and I hate all the picture with me in them. I felt so out of control food wise. I wanted this year to be different.
And I did it!
I weighed myself today I have actually lost 21.5 pounds.
I did something else pretty cool today. I set my goal weight. This is something I've been avoiding, but I realized that if I put my mind to it I can hit that weight I have in my head. I have done it before, so screw my fears that I can't because I've had a baby. I've put my mind to it and I am doing it!!
As for another 20 pound goal ...
I'm not sure.
We're looking ahead to an extremely busy month of travelling, staying in Oakville for a bit and having alternate babysitters while our daycare is closed (a whole other post all of its own). I think my main goal - and my doctor would LOVE this one - is to stick with it and to not let stress ruin what I am doing. Because according to her the reason that I do overeat is, all thyroid issues aside, because I eat when I am stressed.
So, here we go again.
So, cheers to me and feeling better about myself :)
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