Our Soccer Star

Last night my niece had her first soccer game ever. It was adorable.

We watched the practice and the game. You know what I loved about it? It was all about just having fun. Every time either team scored a goal all the parents cheered. I know we've all read about the competition between parents. And these kids are only 4. But still. It was fun to watch.

Kyla had a blast! She did great at practice and had a ton of fun playing soccer. Matt and Paige didn't quite understand the concept of sitting still and watching, but they sure had fun!

Wosie Wose Petal

We got an adorable little kitten tonight.
I'm sure my husband wants to kill me! But, the kitten is so cute.

I've been thinking about getting a kitten for awhile. Our cat is a little dull (I love her, but she is a solitary being), and she doesn't really let Matt play with her. I love how much Matt loves kittens. And I love kittens.

So, when my sister got a kitten today, and told me that her sister was still there I couldn't resist. (The kittens were left with the vet - I'm opposed to pet stores).

I didn't tell my husband - partly because I love surprises, partly because I didn't want him to say no.
This kitten is adorable.

I let Matt and Kyla name her. Together they came up with the name Rosie Rose Petal. Or, as Matt says, "Wosie Wose Petal."

It's soooooo cute. He keeps saying he loves her and she's cute.
Added bonus - he has not pointed out a cute baby, that he wants as a baby sister, all night. (Matthew is on the whole "I want a sister or brother" bandwagon)
So ... for now we have an adorable kitten.
Our cat is unbelievably okay with the whole thing. She just kind of looks at us and walks away.
LOVE!

Just Not in the Mood

for the past few days I haven't felt like running. Or exercising. Nothing. Nada.
I really wanted to loaf on the couch and do nothing.
So I did.
Really. Did nothing. I didn't watch what I was eating. I didn't workout. I basically got lazy. I ate cake and candy and fast food.
I fell off my health bandwagon a couple of weeks ago and it's been so hard to get back on. I know this sounds like an excuse, but to be honest, since my Grandma died I've just felt so low. It's been hard to care about stuff. My nice fitness and eating healthy regime went out the window. Instead of exercising religously I just kind of went a couple of times - so I didn't feel guilty.
I hate this side of me. It's like when I hit a low I hit it and stay there, and it takes so much effort to get back to the part of me that really wants to be enthusiastic and focused and doing well.
Sometimes I think that no one notices. But they do. A friend of mine commented on it the other day - and said it's like I'm trying to shake my sadness and I can't. It's true. To me it's this feeling of loss and frustration and guilt that I can't get rid of.
And I take it out on myself.
Like, maybe if I eat a few more cookies and hate how I look I can distract myself from how I feel. I know. That's very Dr. Phil. And it's so annoying.
So tonight I went for a run.
Okay, I should back track a bit. I made a doctor's appointment for next Monday. And, then I realized that I committed to her that I would a)meet my goal of running 5k - which I did last week, b) focus on eating healthy c) drink lots of water - which I have been doing.
So, tonight I ran.
I was totally not in the mood. I couldn't decide if I wanted to go outside or to the gym. I didn't know whether I wanted shorts or pants. I basically didn't want to do it.
But, I did. Because I know next week I will be held accountable. And I hate not being committed. And, I also know, that if I were to tell my doctor she would say to me that the way to get through this, to not succumb is to get out there. To run through the sadness and guilt and frustration. To be outside. To appreciate life. And to not give in to the desire to do harm.
And, so I ran. And the first block sucked. But by the second block I realized that I was happy. That the run was lifting my spirits. And I felt totally energized - till the last 5 minutes when I ran my butt off and really could only focus on the mantra of "make it home. you can do it".
And I did make it home. And I can do it.
And this too shall pass.