First Pictures

I went for a quick 3D Ultrasound today.
The only word to describe it is AMAZING.
Here are my first pictures of my little baby. And, I now know for sure that it's a girl!




I didn't do this with Matthew because I kind of thought that the pictures looked like aliens. But, I went today because I wanted to confirm gender. And then it was this amazing experience. AMAZING!

We're going back in 6 weeks. It's that great. Everything seems so incredibly real now. Usually ultrasounds kinda look like blobs to me, but today I saw a baby. Sixteen weeks to go .... Suddenly I can't wait.

My Glamorous Life

GLAMOROUS: full of glamour, excitingly attractive

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I debated this post for quite awhile. Usually I just write whatever is on my mind, whether it's happy or sad, good or bad. Some of what I say about myself is positive, but there's also the negative. I think that's balance.
And, I truly believe that if you want to be a better person you need to see both the good and the bad in yourself.
For the most part there are things I love about myself. I'm lucky to be surrounded by amazing friends, a fantastic family and great colleagues. I am incredibly blessed to have a child who, in my opinion, is the most fabulous child in the entire world.
I like my job. Not every day is perfect. But, I've worked hard to get where I am, and if the feedback I get is any indication I'm doing alright. (except, of course, for my messy desk.)
As wonderful as all of this is, I work at it. I'm not perfect, but I'm pretty good sister, friend, colleague and most of all mother. If I hurt someone I apologize. I work on friendships.
And, above all I'm loyal.
It really really bugs me when people switch sides constantly. I think everyone has been on the receiving end of a friendship that has been dumped when someone "cooler" comes along. I'll be the first to admit that I've done that in the past. But, to me, being a true friend is about sticking by someone. Even if that hurts your reputation.
So far, in life, that has worked for me.
And, the longer I've been blogging the more I've realized that this translates to the blog world. Granted I don't think all the bloggers whose blogs I visit are my "friends". But, if someone has made a difference in my life, and if I like his or her writing, then by all means I'm going to stay loyal to that blogger.
So, why am I saying that?
Because I'm tired of being mocked for loyalty to a specific blogger. (It all started with this and then this)
For those of you who have read my blog very long you'll know that I really respect a specific writer/blogger. I've written about her in the past - and I've been open about how great I think she is.
That hasn't changed.
But, she has critics. And they are nasty. And, as time goes on, as much as they like to mock her, they have become really cruel to me.
And, the dumb thing is, the only reason that I do reply on that blog occasionally is because sometimes I think they are being too vicious and nasty, and whether or not the person they are being nasty to cares, reads it or never responds, I sometimes do say something because if it were me I would want someone in my corner.
That's who I am.
Whether or not that person cares, I do.
But, I've had it. I'm tired of reading comments that are mean for no reason. I'm tired of being judged. It makes me sick when people say that my blog is more boring to read than watching paint dry. It bothers me that people joke about who the father of my "love child" is.
In all honesty, I'm pregnant, and I've been sick for months, and there are days when making it through the day without crying is an accomplishment. And, to go read unnecessary and unwarranted criticism about me that is only posted so that a bunch of losers can read their own jokes and laugh ... NO THANKS.

After this - I'm done. And, this is what they think is funny. I don't.
The comment that bugs me the most is this. It bothers me because it is so incorrect.

"Re the question about (Laural). She's a mommy blogger, and she's been psychoanalyzed quite thoroughly by previous commentors. Low self esteem. Unglamorous life. Fantasy projection."

So, to that person, and to anyone else who reads this blog I have this to say. I'm happy. I sleep at night because I am happy with my life and everything in it. My blog is about my life. And, I am a fallible person who admits her week points. If you think that's low self esteem. whatever.
But as for an unglamorous life - consult a dictionary. To me my life is "excitingly attractive". I love and am loved. I'm not quite sure what else I could ask for.
And as for "fantasy projection" ... what's to project? No one's life is perfect. Parenting is hard. Work is hard. But at the end of the day I'm grateful for what I have, I'm grateful for what I'm working towards. This is what I dreamed of. Sure I have goals and dreams and hopes. That's what propels me through life.
But, if you're reading this blog to mock me. And if you think that because I'm comfortable with my imperfections it means I need to be psychoanalysed you're wrong. Life is what you make it and to me life is beautiful.

I Can Hear!!!

Seriously, after a million home remedies, I can finally hear again.
It's a little touch and go.
My ears keep popping. One minute I can hear - the next I can't. But thankfully for the past hour I have actually been able to hear with both of my ears. It has been a full week since my ear has been clogged - so this is huge.

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In other news, I'm almost done my Christmas shopping.
On the weekend I got Mike's Christmas gift. He's the hardest person on my list to shop for. And, he also tries to guess his gifts in advance.
There will be no clues here. But, let's just say I think he'll be pleasantly surprised. And I'm pretty excited.

On top of that I finished shopping for my sister tonight. I actually was done, but then I got a moment of inspiration and had to go back out to get one more thing.

This leaves me in pretty good shape. I still have daycare gifts to buy, but I usually get those at the last minute. And I know what I'm getting. The first of my presents will sort of be delivered this weekend because my in-laws are taking my gifts for my sister in law and her boyfriend. Because they are travelling with the gifts we don't get to wrap them. That kind of sucks, but what can you do?

As Matt said in the van tonight "hurry up, Christmas!" I'm beginning to feel the same way. I'm ready!!!!

The Ear Bone's Connected to the ...

To what?
Oh nothing.
Does anyone know much about the ear? Cause apparently I do not.
On Saturday, after a lengthy shopping trip with my sister we went to Shoppers Drug Mart. I have this stupid nagging ear issue, which can apparently be fixed with an over-the-counter remedy that you put in your ears for 15 minutes and then drain out with water.
(no, hydrogen peroxide hasn't worked. Nor has vinegar)
So, I had little consult with the pharmacist.
He showed me the product he recommended, and explained you put it in your ear. You stick a cotton ball in to plug it and then 15 minutes later you get a syringe, fill it with water and rinse your ear out. Then let it drain.
Sounds easy enough.
Except ...
I did not understand that ears are not connected.

I truly believed that if I put the goo in my right ear (or my deaf ear) it would all drain out the left ear. So, I was trying to figure out which ear I should put the cotton in and which ear I should hold a bowl under when Mike was rinsing my ear.
Stupidly I asked the pharmicist these questions.
He was baffled.
My sister was baffled.
And then at the same moment both the pharmacist and my sister, who apparently paid far more attention in science than I ever did started laughing.
The pharmacist, who was trying to maintain some manner of professionalism, nicely said that unlike what I may have seen on television, ears are not connected that way.
Wow!
Thank goodness I didn't go into medicine :)

But seriously - does anyone know how to get rid of ear wax? I've never had this problem before and it's driving me crazy.

Enough!

Last night I officially lost it.
I've been sick, and tired.
This pregnancy has taken more out of me than I care to admit, but I'm trying to keep it together. I'm trying to get work done, be a good mom, be a good wife and get ready for Christmas. For the most part I keep it together.
And then there was last night.
Matt woke up in the middle of the night puking. He's got a horrible cough, and he coughed so hard he threw up.
So, Mike and I cleaned him up, and he came to sleep in my bed while Mike took the couch. This worked for a couple of hours until 2:00 when Matt's coughing kept waking me up. I was trying to sleep, but the constant coughing was driving me up the wall.
So I decided to move him.
In order to do this I had to take the blankets off the top bunk of his bunk bed and move them to the bottom bunk because I can't lift Matt up to the top bunk.
As I was moving the blankets, one of his toys - the f*&%ing Puzzle Bug came flying out of the blanket on the upper bunk and whacked me in the eye.
I LOST IT.
I've put up with more than enough. A toy in the eye was pretty much more than I could handle, especially at 2 am.
So, there I was grasping my eye, crying, and trying to make Matt's bed.
I then woke him up to move him. By that point I wasn't even aware I was still crying. I just was. So Matt started crying. So there we were, both sobbing, while trying to move beds.
Poor Mike stumbled up the stairs at this point thinking there was some major crisis.
The ridiculousness of the situation didn't occur to me at the time.
Mike calmed Matthew down and then came to figure out why I was so upset.
At this point I'd cleaned up the blood (cause yes, it did actually cut me) and was just standing in the bathroom crying.
I think I managed to say "I've had enough. I can't handle this."
Wisely Mike just let me cry. And cry. And cry.
He knows me well enough that when I hit the point of not being able to put to make sense of my tears I probably just need some space to cry.
Eventually I fell asleep. Exhausted, in pain, and just utterly utterly frustrated.
Now that it's morning the outlook is a little brighter.
My eye is cut, but at least I don't have a black eye. I'm still deaf in one ear, but at least it's not throbbing anymore. My nose is still stuffy, and my throat still hurts. But they are bearable.
I'm hoping that cleaning the house, listening to Christmas music and having an afternoon nap will make things a little better.
But seriously, ENOUGH!

Imagination

The Christmas television commercials are hitting the air, and my favourite ones are for toys. I love watching them with Matt. I don't care about consumerism and all of that right now because for a month I let him watch the stations with all the ads and see what's out there.
I love watching his face when a really cool new toy is advertised.
He rarely asks for one. I'm not quite sure he understands that the ads are telling him to buy it - he's just pretty enamoured watching what these things can do.
We already know what we're asking Santa for, and I have a pretty good idea what Santa, and assorted relatives, will be getting for Matthew. He loves Christmas morning, but doesn't seem to think of it only as about gifts.
He still appreciates the magic.
But, what these commercials have got me thinking about is imagination.
I'll be the first to admit that I am swayed by advertising - especially when I read about and see toys that are educational.
When Matthew was really little, I was quite obsessed with toys that encouraged imagination. I wasn't sure if I would have another baby, and I didn't want him to be lonely. I wanted him to find the same joy in imagination as I did.
I can still remember the hours and hours we spent playing with the Fisher Price Little People. My sister and I had names for them all (she got to be "green girl" - the girl in the green dress, and I got to be "blue girl" - you got it, the girl in the blue dress). As we got older we moved on to dolls where I would play school for hours on end (our favourites were Sarah and Mandy and Jenny) . And, eventually it was on to Barbies. (we had tons, and I can still tell you all their names).
What was unique about these toys is that they didn't make sounds. They didn't have speech that told us what they were saying, rather we had to make it up. This wasn't a hardship for us. We loved playing with our dolls.
We did eventually get Nintendo, but I have to admit that Super Mario Brothers were boring compared to the sordid love lives of our Barbies who swapped boyfriends, traded cars and exchanged children. For kids not allowed to watch Soap Operas, we were very creative.
But, when it comes to Matthew, I never knew what to do with gifts.
Did I accept that it was 25 years later and toys are "more advanced" or did I get non-noisy toys.
In the end, I got a mix. Truthfully, I got swayed by the amazing things the toys did. I don't know that it's called giving in so much as going with the flow.
But, last night I started thinking about this when I was watching Matthew play.
Our big chair was turned into a boat, and a bunch of cars were gathered on it. He had different noises for each car or truck, and sang as he played. Every so often he'd stop to dictate what was going on. At one point he needed more toys from downstairs and told us to "keep an eye on the trucks".
And it struck me that his imagination is just fine.
In fact, it's more than fine. He comes up with crazy and zany ideas. He loves to talk about the "monster baby" that is growing in his tummy. He makes up stories about all sorts of things and is constantly telling us made up jokes.
And, I realize that his imagination is vivid and growing.
So, bring on the toys. I'm beginning to realize that no matter what we give him he will add it to his own fantasy world anyway.
It's amazing to watch him learn and grow.

And .... today is the last day of NaBloPoMo! Yay! I'm so glad I did it and managed to write every day, but it will also be nice to take a little break from daily writing.

The Question...

Yes THAT question.
"How did my baby get in your tummy?"
I'm not sure why the question never occurred to Matthew before, but today, when we were waiting for Mike to get home, Matt wanted to know all about how the baby got into my tummy.
I asked how he thought the baby got in there.
Apparently he thought I ate the baby.
In his mind I ate some sort of seed, and then when I eat and drink (especially milk) the baby grows and grows.
I guess he got it sort of right.
So, then he said "well, if you didn't eat the baby how'd it get in there?"
My answer "Daddy."
"How did Daddy get it in you - did he throw her?"
Ummmm ... no.
And at that point I said that this is something Daddy could explain because he put her there.
And then Mike got home.
And they got talking about Cars and daycare and Becky picking Matthew up at daycare. The question was averted - for tonight.
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My sister picked Matt up from daycare today, and so she and the kids came in for a bit (with some super yummy soup for dinner) My niece, Paige, is talking a LOT these days. Like in the last 2 weeks she hasn't stopped talking.
She must have asked about 16 times in 5 minutes, if "that baby girl in your tummy is coming out soon."
But, she cracks me up. "Aunt Laural, you having that Baby Girl in your tummy yet?"
No, not yet.
Thirty seconds later "Aunt Laural, you having that Baby Girl in your tummy yet?"
I tried to explain that it's not for a long time. First Christmas, then Valentines Day and then right before her daddy's birthday the baby comes (my section is scheduled the day before my brother in law's birthday).
She looked at me, said okay, and then said "Aunt Laural, you got any cheese?"
She makes me laugh!

The Mucosy Fog is Lifting

It turns out I did, indeed, have a sinus infection - combined with an ear infection and and strep throat.
First of all - what's with strep throat? I have had it before, but I have no idea how to tell if I have it. I mean, I have been taking halls, but it was bearable and I only mentioned it as an aside. But, last year I had the worst sore throat imaginable, and the doctor just told me to drink cold drinks and take halls.
Weird.
Anyway, I went to my appointment, and mentioned about 3 times that I needed an antibiotic that I could take when pregnant - and penicillin free. So, she gave me a prescription and I asked if she was sure I could use it while pregnant.
Her response? "It should be."
Okay - I really I've been a little over-anxious this pregnancy, but all along I've been pretty confident that if my doctor tells me something I trust it.
"It should be" is not a phrase I trusted.
So, I went to my favourite pharmacy and spoke to the pharmacist that I trust.
He looked at the prescription and told me that he did not feel comfortable prescribing that to me. He asked if I wanted to come look at what the risks were. (they have a huge book of prescriptions and the side effects. It's fascinating).
The side effect - "toxicity to the fetus".
WHAT????
I kind of freaked out. He explained to me that penicillin, which I'm allergic to, is what they would normally give. Okay. I get that. But, I'm not willing to take something possibly toxic to the fetus.
I was at the store for an hour.
There were faxes back and forth.
I called my OB.
He called both the doctor and Motherisk. (actually, that was to make me feel better, I think). In the end he came up with a prescription that is safe to take. The doctor signed off. My OB said okay.
All's well that ends well. But, the moral of the story is if you have doubts ASK.
As for the sinuses, ear and throat? Well, between the medication and the various sprays and other stuff I have to take I'm feeling very medicated and a little bit better.
Going to bed at 6:30 also helped.

Sick Day

I finally gave in ... and called in sick.
Tylenol isn't helping. Halls aren't helping. I'm not sleeping.
And, I just couldn't face a train ride and then sitting at my desk all day.
So - I'm logging in from home to work. And, when I'm done what I have to do I'm sleeping. And taking it easy. And eating some soup.
I'm trying to decide if it's worth my effort to get dressed and go to a walk-in clinic because I know my sinuses are infected. But, I'm not sure if they can do anything other than tell me to sleep and eat soup.
Oh - and I don't have the car today, so I'll have to ask my mom or sister to bring me. And though I'm sure they would if I called it still means talking on the phone with no voice and a headache.

Ugh.

Sorry. Usually I'm way more upbeat on my blog. It's just hard when everything hurts. I swore I would not be like this when I'm pregnant. What's wrong with me?

So, let's review what I'm happy about:

• Christmas is coming. Yay!
• Next week is Matt's daycare Christmas party - love that!
• Despite the fact that I feel like complete crap the baby inside me is growing and healthy!
• Matthew makes me smile every single day
• I'm almost done my Christmas cards. The only people left are the people who I didn't have addresses for and I'm slowly getting those addresses.
• I have a cold now which could quite possibly mean I'll be healthy for Christmas
• I have more vacation days left than I thought - this means that I can take the time off I've booked at Christmas and then take a couple of extra days or transfer them over to next year.
  

Okay - I'm off to make some decaf tea in hopes of at least feeling a little better.

Monday Already?

Ugh.
That's the only word for it.
I'm still sick. And I'm tired. But, I've been up for hours. And I see a busy week ahead. Between doctors appointments (2 this week... I love my ob, but I have about a zillion more appointments and tests etc than I did with my midwife), some work deadline, and this stupid lingering cold that has me sneezing every 2 minutes I'm tired.
And the week hasn't even started.
Our house is a disaster.
My poor husband has been trying to keep up in my wake. He even made beef stew and dumplings last night! And got a hair cut! He's trying. But, trying to keep a house clean when it's hard to get off the couch is nearly impossible. I know we could get someone in to clean, but half the problem, at least, is organizing and tidying and keeping up with it all.
I'm debating taking a couple of days off to get stuff in order.
But, not when I'm sick. Because no matter what has to be done, I've discovered that sleeping seems to make the problem go away.
Yesterday I came home from our really cool kids Christmas party (more on that tomorrow) and slept for 2 hours.
Then I got up and organized baby clothes, and then I fell back asleep.
The laundry is still piled up. The bathroom still needs cleaning.
At least I went to the grocery store to get some food for dinner tonight (frozen pizza - there's sustenance), but if we are being honest, I only went because I had the worst craving for McCain Deep and Delicious chocolate cake. And, really, it's pretty much the first real craving in months, so I figured one piece would not kill my attempt for a healthy pregnancy. And ... after Mike had made dinner, done the dishes and a bunch of other things, asking him to go get me cake just seemed mean.
And, when I went to pay for the cake, tonight's pizza and a few other assorted items I realized that I knew every single cashier who was working because we pretty much go to the grocery store every day. It's like we can't even get it together enough to make weekly trips to the store. I actually choose the line based on who is working. Sad. It's a whole new dimension.
The weird thing is, second trimester is supposed to be the "honeymoon phase" of pregnancy. Seriously. For me it's more of the "please shoot me and get me out of this misery" phase. Though I think that has less to do with the pregnancy and more to do with being sick constantly, being denied cold medicine and being so freaking tired. Oh, and a little added stress on the side.

So, how's your Monday?

A Birthday at McDonalds & a hot Date

Matthew went to a birthday party yesterday. It was the first time that he was invited to a birthday party where parents were allowed to leave and come back in a couple of hours.

I was totally fine with the idea - until we had to leave! Mike was with me, and was totally encouraging me to leave. After giving the mother my cell number, and telling her where we were going (cause I'm sure she was going to remember that detail while chasing 3 year olds) off we went.

It was funny because there were a lot of kids from daycare there, and they all were either 3 or 4. And, those parents weren't quite sure what to do either. The parents who also had older children were scurrying out like us. The "first timers" were hovering. Some parents decided to stay.

I think the decision wouldn't have been quite as easy if we didn't know all of the kids, but Matt knew pretty much eveyr other child from daycare, and they were so funny to watch. They are so used to following each other and lining up, that when the McDonald's staff wanted them to do something, they would automatically line up just like at school. Hilarious.

We came back early to watch. It was really well organized. The McDonald's staff was fairly young and were great with the kids. I ended up chatting for awhile with the birthday boy's mom. It was a really fun time for all of us.

But ... what did Mike and I do during the hour anda half we didn't spend at McDonald's? We went on a date! Well, a funny one.

We picked up a baby name book at Chapters, and then we went to Starbucks (across from the McDonald's) and we discussed baby names. We basically went through all of the names in the letters we liked, and CAME UP WITH A NAME! This is quite a feat.

Mike and I are on opposite sides of the spectrum when it comes to names. I really love one name, and Mike said we could go with it. But, I knew he hated it, and as great as it is to get my own way, I don't want my child growing up with her dad hating her name. I mean, how many times in a day do you say your child's name? Not to mention my brother-in-law totally guessed what name I wanted to go with and keeps making fun of it. (I'm not offended. It's akin to a big brother making fun of a name). But, if it was that great a name ... they would both like it.

But, the name we came up with.

Here's the thing. Before I was pregnant, when we weren't trying yet but I knew I was ready, I had a dream that I had a baby girl. And, we gave her this name. The dream stuck with me and I mentioned it the next day to Mike. And, he loved the name. I had even dreamed the spelling up. How weird is that????

So, yesterday one of the names I mentioned was the one from the dream. And, again we both fell in love with it. Spelling and all. How great is that? I'm pretty excited! I'm not telling anyone what it is. Why? Because that is the one thing that want to keep secret.

Saturday Morning Confessions

want to know something?
As excited as I am about having a baby girl, I'm a little worried too.
When I first found out I was having a boy I was thrown for a loop. But, as Matthew has gotten bigger I've gotten into quite the routine with a boy. Sure he's got a strong personality. And, I definitely have had to learn about cars and trucks and trains. But, in some ways, having a boy is easy.
He is easy to please. And there's lots of stuff I don't worry too much about. Of course I want him to have friends, but when I see him with the other kids at daycare, it seems like because he is a boy he fits in pretty easily with the other boys.
The other day I went to pick him up. He laid on the floor pretending to be dead, and his friend came over and gently kicked him. Granted the little boy's dad got upset and made him apologize, but both boys thought it was hilarious. When Matt brings his transformers to daycare they pull out the other cars and trucks and the boys are off and running, banging each other's toys and making loud noises.
Easy.
And then I watch the girls.
At the age of 3 and 4 there is already division in the ranks. There are little groups and they have certain tastes. Seriously, cliques at the age of 3. It's not encouraged by the daycare, but at the same time, it happens really naturally.
When it comes to clothing, Matt is really easy to please. He is thrilled if his t-shirt has a transformer, Diego or a dinosaur. He prefers pants that are easy to pull down (i.e. elastic waists). If I want to dress him up for a photo I do. And, if I feel like making his hair spiky he's happy.
I've been around both of my nieces to know that that is not the case with girls.
Don't get me wrong. I'm thrilled about having a girl. But, I'm terrified. I have paid close attention to my younger niece when it comes to stuff like clothes and shoes. I figure I have between 12-18 months before a girl starts dictating what she wants to wear. My niece, Paige, is 2, and she already knows what she likes and doesn't like when it comes to clothes. Once I tried to help my sister get her ready, and I was baffled by which pink dress the child wanted. I had to recruit her sister Kyla, 5, to help me out.
And as for Kyla and her clothes ... dear god! I took her shopping awhile ago. It was an incredibly fun experience, but the girl has preferences. She doesn't just want pink, she wants specific shades of pink.
And then there's the issue of whether she wants stuff with Princesses or Tinkerbell. I just learned last week that in her world princesses are out and Tinkerbell is in.
Ahhhh!
The last time I went to see my hairstylist we got on to the topic of kids and dressing them. I quite boldly told him that I think it's up to parents to help their kids by making sure that they are well dressed and fit in with their peers. I do sincerely mean that. I don't mean you need to dress your child head to toe in the most expensive clothes out there, but I think you need to help your child make good fashion choices so their peers don't mock them. Seriously! He laughed, and told me to give it a few years.
He doesn't have kids ... but he's really smart in pretty much everything.
And, I'm beginning to think he's right - it's not that easy.
And, that, my friends, is just a little of what I'm worrying about bright and early on a Saturday morning.

A Box of Pee

No, really. A box of pee.
Last night when Mike and I were making dinner (okay, scooping out my sister's fabulous crock pot dinner on to plates - have I mentioned I now live for Crock Pot Thursday?) Matthew came over to me with one of his little crates that opens and closes. It's plastic and it came with a little kid's airplane system.
Anyway, he says "I have a present for you, Mom."
I was about to open it and thought to ask him what was in it.
He told me pee.
What???
"I made you a box of pee."
He was very every excited about this new discovery - that he could aim so specifically into something, in this case a box. He was so excited that he gave it to me as a present.
I thought he was kidding.
Mike thought he was kidding.
So, we opened it very carefully. The little crate was yellow anyway, so there was no telling. We poured a little over the sink. Still couldn't tell.
So Mike smelled it.
Sure enough. It was a box of pee.
Thanks, Matt!
We didn't punish him. I mean, it's not like we ever told him not to pee into toys and then give them as gifts. He thought he was being loving. We did explain that it was gross and that he should never do that again.
He left the kitchen and we nearly died laughing.
Seriously. Pee in a box.
Merry Christmas.

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As for my cold and general yucky feeling ...
I had a doctor's appointment. The best I can do is tylenol. And sleep. And feel sorry for myself. But, I think part of it is the weather change and I know this will pass.
But, the good news is that I had a great ob appt. The baby is moving a LOT - it was hard to get the heartbeat because the baby kept kicking the doppler. It was funny. But, there's a strong heartbeat and I'm healthy.
I also mentioned that I'm still getting sick and it's from the pre-natal vitamins. Who knew there's a prescription vitamin that doesn't make you nauseous? My doctor gave me a sample, and sure enough I ate breakfast today and did not puke! Life is good. You take 2 per day - one in the morning and one at night. I have no idea how I'll remember, but I feel like I will actually get some nutrients. Yay!
And, apparently my weight gain is "perfect." Just enough that I'm healthy - but not too much. Mind you, now that I have vitamins that don't make me sick, we'll see what I weigh next month!

Snow and Colds = Bleck

I'm sick.
I have a stupid cold and feel like crap.
And it's snowing.
It's not exactly the end of the world, but this morning it kind of felt that way. It didn't help that I couldn't find the pants that I wanted to wear. Why was this? Because my husband's idea of "doing laundry" was throwing every single piece of laundry on top of the freezer and letting me search. Nice.
Hopefully the commute today won't be too bad. But the truth is that as soon as there is any sort of weather condition GO Trains run late. I'm not sure why. But, I'm guessing we will be on the platform for awhile.
wow.
Could I be any crankier today?
Today would have been a great day to sleep in and call in sick. After all, I am sick. But, I've taken some sick days already. And, I have a ton of work today. And I have a doctor's appointment today.
The good news is that at least I know where my boots are. I have a beautiful new scarf thanks to my friend Meghan (who knit it for me) And I was successful on my hunt for a maternity winter coat (thanks, Kerry!)
Life would be good if I could stop sneezing and my throat felt better.

Photo Fun

Last night my parents had me bring Matthew to get his picture taken with his cousins and my parents.
The session was booked for 6:20 pm. We arrived at the photo session at 6:23. Prior to that time, Mike picked me up from the GO Station (5:35) and picked Matt up from daycare. We changed his clothes and did his hair, took him to McDonald's where he got stuck in a huge play structure (and when I started panicking a lovely 5 year old boy climbed and led him down the slide), got lost twice on the way to the session, had one near argument about directions and finally made it to the location.
Three minutes late. Not bad.
Of course, before Matt joined the picture my sister's family had their picture taken. All the children discovered the joys of stools that went up and down, and all generally ran in circles waiting for their turn.
It's no surprise that when, at 7pm, they started the photo session that included all 3 kids (ages 5, 3, 2) and two grandparents its was an interesting experience.
We could not get them to all smile. When I told Matt and Kyla, who were both standing on risers, to stand like soldiers, Matthew started to march while Kyla put one hand to her head. Paige meanwhile was alternating between imitating Matthew and Kyla and whining that she had to sit on Grandma's lap instead of marching on a riser.
When we did get them in one place their smiles were ridiculous. Paige has discovered the joys of making faces and this cracked Kyla up. Matthew tried to copy Paige. (note: Paige and Matthew can be a lethal combination since they have the same sense of humour and are both very adventurous)
And the poor photographer was trying to keep her cool.
Matthew was annoying her the most because he would not stand still. So, she went over to him and whispered something in his ear to keep him quiet. As soon as she turned her back to him he very dramatically stuck his tongue out. My mom and I both lost it. We kind of felt the same way. Because we were laughing everyone got going.
There was one picture after that before we called it a night.
The picture ... it wasn't fantastic.
But, it's for my 98 year old grandfather who will appreciate the thought behind it. And, having had children, grandchildren and now great grandchildren, knows that kids will be kids and will probably just appreciate that we got them all together for the occasion.
we discussed the idea of doing this next year. With a six-month old. Hmmm .... Let's see just how much my grandad appreciates the picture. Who knows, maybe we will all get in the picture (my sister, our husbands and I all opted out this year). However, if this does happen I think we'll be passing a flask among the adults because I think a little alcohol would make it a little more bearable.
And, yeah, maybe we'll get a sedative for Matt. But that's next year.
For now we're home, in one piece.

He's So Sweet

Sometimes I'm struck by how sweet and kind my son can be.
Take for example tonight. He was overjoyed to receive a birthday party invitation to his friend's party.
Okay, first of all, is it me, or did McDonald's parties kind of go out of style for awhile and are now popular again.
Anyway, we were en route to Walmart and we were asking him what he thought Austin would like for his birthday. Matt's current favourite toys are his 2 transformers toys: Bumblebee and Optimus Prime.
So, I said "maybe we could get Bumblebee for Austin."
What I meant by that was that we could go to the toy section and buy this toy for Austin. Matthew was really sad for a second and then said "Okay. Austin can have Bumblebee and I will still have Optimus Prime."
In other words, he was willing to give away his favourite toy as a birthday gift. That melted my heart. I can't say that I'm always willing to give away my favourite things for my friends. I try to model that. But it amazes me how much love kids have.
He is doing this all the time.
When we had all our Hallowe'en candy sitting out, he was usually more excited about sharing with everyone than eating it himself.
I know this will change. But for now I'm loving it.

Pink It Is!

Now that we've given our parents ample time to tell everyone, I can officially tell everyone here
I'm having a girl!
Yay!
Of course I'd love a boy just as much. But, I'm thrilled about having a girl. I'm looking forward to shopping for pink clothes and spending hours playing Barbies. I'm looking forward to the baby dolls and the hair accessories and shows like Strawberry Shortcake.
I know that's a little shallow, but I'm a girly girl.
I love Matthew to death. I love that I've learned to find the joys in playing Transformers and watching Cars.
But, bringing some pink to this house will be a good thing.
We've started designing the nursery. And, of course I have started buying clothes. A onesie here, a sleeper there. It's fun! My sister has brought over boxes of girl things from my nieces. It's a little bit overwhelming, but I'm loving it.
The funny part of all of this, is that we are having a hard time choosing names. There are so many we like, and we want to pick the right one.
When I was pregnant with Matthew (believe it or not, that name took us forever to pick) we already knew that if we were having a girl her name wold be Jessica. But, to me that name sort of belongs to Matt, and it seems weird to consider it for this baby. It seems like a hand-me-down. I know, that's weird. But, still ...
Anyone have any great name ideas?

And, how cute is this? On Saturday night Kyla and Paige came for a visit. Paige (2) has started talking a LOT. At least, we can finally understand a lot of what she is saying now. And, every time she wants to get Matt's attention she shouts "Matt. Matty. Matt ADAMS." It cracks me up every single time I hear it.
For someone so tiny that child knows how to get our attention.

Santa Is Coming

Yesterday was our neighbouring town's Santa Claus Parade.
Together with my sister's family, my parents' neighbours (and our friends) and a fellow WonderMommy's family we all descended on the Santa Claus Parade. It's a lot smaller than the Toronto one, which means easy access to parking, no long line ups, and a shorter parade, something to consider when a pregnant bladder and recently toilet trained children are in the mix!

The parade was really really fun. It was a little chilly, but we were all bundled.

The Firetrucks Started It Off

Matt LOVED the pirate (a little scary I thought)

Loving my Clown Nose!
The hat is Matt's but he didn't want it

And Of Course ... SANTA!

Number 1 or Number 2

Don't ask how the topic came up.
I don't know.
But the other day I explained to Matthew that when you go to the washroom, pee is called #1 and poo is called #2.
I should have known Matt would be fascinated by this. He loves numbers. He loves bathroom humour. The combination was just too much not to become enamoured by.
Since Wednesday he's been somewhat obsessed with the topic. It's hilarious.
He used to run to the bathroom and say "I have to pee."
Now it's "I'm just doing number 1!"
And, of course this has spilled over to daycare. Instead of telling his teachers he needs to use the bathroom he tells them that he has to do number 1 or number 2. Apparently his one teacher, Denise, finds it funniest. And he thinks nothing of running through the classroom screaming "time for number 2."
Yes, the teachers are thanking me daily!
I'm sure the other parents are also.
And, in our home the excitement continues. If I'm in the washroom, no matter the time of day, Matthew usually shouts our "you doing number 1 or number 2?"
We're now teaching him this is a question only for home or daycare. With kids, especially when they are toilet training, potty talk is such an easy conversation. But, we're trying to explain to him that people don't like being asked about what they do in the bathroom.
We'll see how well that conversation goes!

Pink or Blue??? I know!

I do. I know what I'm having.
After the world's most bizarre ultrasound experience on Wednesday, I left feeling dejected. I was so hoping to find out and they were idiots.
But, then I called my OB's office yesterday.
I called fairly early in the morning. The receptionist there is incredible. When I explained to her that I was dying to know the gender, she said she would see what she could do, and told me to call back at about 2pm.
Of course I did.
It turns out that on her lunch hour she walked over to the ultrasound clinic to pick up the results. How amazing is that? So when we spoke again she was able to tell me the gender.
Mike really wanted to know, but I told him we had to wait another day.
And then I called my sister. She decorated our house in a colour appropriate theme. And, to keep Mike out of the house, I convinced my mom to call him and have him come over to her house to help her with a bizarre computer problem. (which didn't exist).
Meanwhile I went to Baby Gap and picked up a colour appropriate hat and socks.
It was a busy afternoon!
When we got home I made him go buy bread for dinner, and locked him out of the house, just to buy time, while I taught Matt to say "Surprise we're having a baby _______"
It was so cute.
Mike got home, and when he did Matthew shouted out his line. It was a little confusing, but he ended up saying "Happy Birthday! Surprise! We're having a Baby ________" and then handed him the stuff from Baby Gap.
And I cracked open the sparkling apple juice.
It was an evening of celebrating.
My sister and I have already planned out all the bedroom details. I'm warming up my credit card. I'm excited.

I'm not saying te gender today. Feel free to e-mail me if you're curious. We haven't exactly told ALL of our relatives yet, and we want to share the news with some people who read this blog a little more personally first. But, it's not like I can wait 4 more months before blogging about it.

Truthfully, my whole mindset changed after I found out the gender. Honestly, as much as I say I'm happy with either, in the back of my mind I knew what I wanted. But, either way, for me, knowing what I'm having is freeing. It hit me yesterday that this is another baby. I'm excited. And, it's no longer just about the obsessive planning. It's about having another little baby. And, despite some of my anxieties I'm getting excited.

When I tucked Matt in last night I told him that he's going to be hearing more and more about the baby in the next few months. But, I told him that I want him to know how much I love him. And, he told me that he knows, but he knows I'll love the baby "so much too". It was adorable!