Sisters ...

Yesterday I rode home on the train with a friend of mine. More specifically she was a friend of my sister's and she lives next door to my parents.
We know each other kind of well, in the sense that we've been neighbours and we had a lot of similar friends, and so when we see each other on the train there is usually stuff to chat about. In our case yesterday we were talking about work.
She was mentioning how she got her job and then referred her sister who now works with her. They've worked together in the past, and get along really well. And, it just seemed natural. As she got talking about her sister and the topic of mine came into the conversation it just seemed totally natural that our sisters were so involved in our lives.
Then last night I had my sister's girls over for a few hours. They were eating a bowl of Fruit Loops together - Paige would ask for a specific colour and Kyla would hand it to her. It was such a natural act. It wasn't thought out. They weren't trying to be "good" - they were watching tv and sharing a treat.
Natural.
And, it got me wondering how on earth you foster relationships like this.
I will say I'm incredibly lucky to have a sister like I do. And, I think at some point we made a decision, somewhat unconscious, that we were going to choose to be sisters and friends. (and this decision I would say, was made when we were no longer sharing a bathroom!).
But, I think it is more than that.
I've been observing different sets of siblings. Some get along really really well. Some can't stand each other.
One of my friends would tell you that she avoids her sister as much as possible - even though she loves her she just doesn't like her.
Is it parenting? Maybe. I think my parents, specifically my mom, played a role in it - she learned when to referee and when to step back and let us go at it. But now that we have a second baby coming I'm wondering what I can do - or if I can do anything. And, if it's different for boys that girls.
Now - please say you know what movie the picture above is from.
If you don't - here's another clue ...
And, though I know the family loves it when Becky and I do a little rendition of the song "sisters" at Christmas each year, I'm pretty sure that's not why we like each other.

But, since you're already singing along to the song (you are, aren't you) here are the lyrics ...

Sisters
Sisters
There were never such devoted sisters

Never had to have a chaperone "No, sir"
I'm there to keep my eye on her

Caring
Sharing
Every little thing that we are wearing

When a certain gentleman arrived from Rome
She wore the dress and I stayed home

All kinds of weather
We stick together
The same in the rain or sun
Two diff'rent faces
But in tight places
We think and we act as one

Those who've
Seen us
Know that not a thing could come between us

Many men have tried to split us up but no one can
Lord help the mister
Who comes between me and my sister
And Lord help the sister
Who comes between me and my man

Love & Hate Thursday

I stole this idea from Janet, but I'm sure she won't mind!!

Hate: That my day at work absolutely sucked the big one today

Love: That I didn't cry (even though I wanted to). The 3:30 pm Twix and pep talk helped!

Hate: That the Gap jacket I bought was ridiculously over priced

Love: That I'm returning it because my friend Kerry came up with the PERFECT replacement coat that is fantastic

Hate: That tomorrow is Thursday when it should really be Friday

Love: That at least it's not Monday

Hate: That I'm feeling all tense from everything and my neck and shoulders hurt

Love: That I found a place where I can get massage across the street from work - and I got one today - and it's covered by benefits

Hate: This freaking pregnancy heartburn

Love: That it signals the end of Nausea - and that Tums fixes everything

Hate: That I'm missing America's Next Top Model Tonight

Love: That it's because I'm spending quality time with my nieces instead - and eating popcorn (and I'm taping it)

So .... What are yours? I'm curious!

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And, a little snippet from last night's sleepover with the cousins.
After popcorn and teeth brushing we sent the kids to bed. Despite the fact that Matt has 3 beds in his bedroom, they opted to all share one bed.
My older niece fell asleep very quickly. Like in about 10 minutes. Matt and my 2-year old niece were still chatting and giggling for a long time.

When it got quiet I went upstairs to check on them. There they were, curled up together, reading a book with a flashlight.

"what are you doing?" I asked.
"Reading!" they both replied.
So, I told Matt it is time to put the book away and they needed to go to sleep.
He looked at me completely seriously and said "but Mommy, Paige can't read yet so I need to read so she can sleep." It kind of melted my heart and so I said 5 more minutes. And then I peaked in.
Sure enough, he really was teaching Paige to "read."
He was explaining to her how to count all the pictures on the page and then say what they are ("see, 1,2,3,4 umbrellas") and then Paige would copy him.
It was adorable.

I have a feeling that as they get older Paige and Matt are going to be pretty good friends.

In the end I had to bring Matt to my bed because there was no way Paige was going to sleep when she could chat with Matt. When I split them they both fell asleep in minutes.

Christmas Is Coming

There are many things that Mike and I agree on - where we want to live, our goals in life, our finances, childcare options for our son, etc.
These are all good things to agree on - a strong basis for a lasting marriage.
There's just one issue that stands between us at this time of the year - Christmas.
Mike is a bit of a scrooge. I love the holiday. I'm already to start brewing apple cider; I'm debating where we will put the Christmas tree. And the other day Matthew pulled out his Christmas CD and INSISTS we play it in the car. All.The.Time!
This issue has been like an elephant in the room. Neither Mike nor I will bring it up because it could cause a fight. But the truth is I'm delighted by the Christmas excitement, and Mike hates it. We were doing really well avoiding the issue until this morning.
We are in the car. It's 7:10 am. Mike is cranky. Matthew wants the Christmas music. I turn it on, and, HORROR OF HORRORS, I started to sing along. And clap. And get Matt going. And, really, as much as Mike hates the constant Christmas tunes in the van what puts him over the edge is when I sing along.
I don't think it's my voice. It's more my enthusiasm. And the fact that I have most of the words memorized. And the fact that if I don't know a verse I kind of mumble along and pretend.
In fairness, this love of Christmas comes to me honestly.
Growing up my mom was quite happy to have Christmas in July. We'd turn on White Christmas and play our Bing Crosby records. I don't think we ever had a turkey, but I'm pretty sure we baked Christmas cookies. My mom has always believed in celebrating, and so why not have a little Christmas in July. It's not like we exchanged gifts or actually set up the tree.
So, to me, starting the Christmas tunes in October seems pretty natural. I don't start with the holiday decorations until at least the weekend after Halloween. Though this year I do feel we need to go for a little extra oomph since we are in a house. (okay, last year too, but we had just moved).
Not to mention that I started Christmas shopping this weekend and have already started bugging Mike about what we are getting people, gifts for daycare providers, etc etc.

But, while we are on topic of winter ...
I've been on the hunt for a maternity winter coat.
Here - take a look at the one I bought
I like it - a lot.
Here's the issue. It was expensive. I will maybe wear it for 2 seasons tops, and I can't really justify the amount I spent. More specifically, I can't justify that I got it at Gap Canada for $60 more than they are selling it in Gap USA - even though our dollar is AT PAR.
Why did I buy it? Well, because I panicked. I have no jacket and it's cold outside - or will be - and no maternity stores are carrying winter coats. And they didn't have many. So I bought it.
And now I regret it.
I went and checked out Old Navy. Sure they have nice coats online, but not in the store. And, since we're in Canada I can't order from their site. I won't get started on the frustration.
I'm trying to get Mike to go to Buffalo. My rationale - the $60 we would save on the coat would more than compensate for a delicious dinner at Cheesecake Factory. And, I'm pregnant. And want Cheesecake. I'm just apparently not good at arm twisting. And our dollar in ON PAR.
Ummmm
Anyone up for a road trip? Cheesecake is on me!

Sleepover for kitty cats

Rosie Rose Petal, our beloved kitten, is about 5 months now which meant one thing - time to get her spayed.
It wasn't hard to tell this was necessary. She started marking spots in the house and getting a little crazy - so we made an appointment to bring her in. The problem was explaining this to Matthew. Not only was I not quite ready to explain why cats get spayed, I was also a little hesitant to tell Matt that the cat would be in the hospital overnight.
So, in order to avoid a difficult conversation I told him that Rosie was going to have a sleepover with all of her cat friends. I thought I was pretty smart until he asked to go and see the other cats who would be at the sleepover. Luckily the staff played a long and were very helpful.
We didn't think it through too too well because the question when we went to pick her up was why had they cut her stomach open and then taped it closed.
When he has sleepovers with Kyla they just have popcorn and movies (what, no surgery?)
Just wait till I try to explain to him how this baby got in my tummy ... should be interesting!

Healthy Stuff

Lately I've been thinking a lot about what I'm eating. This isn't a new thing for me. I'm always concerned about what I eat, how it will affect my weight, etc.
My latest food thoughts are more about health than calories, but they are still plaguing me a fair bit. I'm trying to balance not overdoing it with making sure that the food I eat has nutritional value. Though following Weight Watchers was great, there are some things you can do. Like, you can eat food with zero nutritional value that won't make you gain weight (think jello), so now I'm trying to eat less of that stuff and more vegetables and beans and all of that.
And I started reading about eating while pregnant. One of the things that almost all of the websites out there tell you is that you should eat healthy stuff because what your child gets in utero is what they will enjoy outside of the womb.
I was even given similar advice from my doctor.
I think they are out to lunch.
Let's look at Matthew for example.
When I was pregnant with him I ate like crap. I bemoaned my weight gain for a good couple years. Poor me gained 80 lbs. Poor me.
Why did I gain that much weight? Because I ate enough for 6. And, I don't mean I ate enough beans and veggies for 6. Nope. I ate multiple servings of poutine. I ate entire pizzas. I could have entered competitive eating contest because I could eat so much.
And very rarely was it healthy.
Sure I had some juice and the occasional salad with my meal, but it was all about the junk food.
Based on the food I consumed, according to what I'm reading, Matt should be a certified french fry eater.
He's not.
For some reason he's really really healthy. His favourite food is tomatoes. If I ask him what he wants for dinner he has been known to request yogurt and cous cous. He declines cookies preferring apples. He loves brocolli. And, oh yeah, if we take him to the food court for lunch or dinner (we're classy!) he walks right past the hamburger places to go to Cultures for salad.
This is all him.
Sure we encourage him to make healthy choices. But, we often have chips in the house. We allow him candy. We've gone to restaurants and ordered him fries for dinner (until we realized he really likes the salad).
All of this leads me to wonder what on earth will happen with this next child. Though I do eat some junk I'm limiting myself way more. First of all, at this point I am not craving junk food that much. When I go to the food court I more often than not grab a salad. McDonald's isn't even a consideration. Last night we had pizza and after a piece and a half I was full. I'm not really eating chocolate (even the halloween candy) and I've completely cut out pork products cause they make me sick.
I'm with Matt - cous cous and yogurt sounds about right.
So, it will be interesting to see the food preference of baby #2. Will he/she follow Matt on his healthy quest - or prefer french fries and ice cream????

Crock Pot Thursday

Want to know what I came home to tonight?
This.

Or more specifically this.

That's right - an incredibly delicious, hot, healthy and prepared for me crock pot dinner courtesy of my sister.
It's not secret that the past few weeks have been a little bit hard with this pregnancy. Between exhaustion and nausea (which, thankfully, is leading to heartburn which I can totally manage) I've kind of had it.
And, my sister, being the amazing person she is, decided to help out by making dinner once a week. She told me to pick whichever night is the worst for me and that's when I got dinner. And, yes, by Thursday I'm ready to throw in the towel.
By Thursday (lately) Mike has kind of had it with trying to figure out what my finicky stomach may enjoy. Though, admittedly I was responsible for meals this week.
The point is, today I came home from work, changed into my pj's and enjoyed being taken care of by my big sis. It was a nice feeling.
Oh, and dinner was super yummy too!
Anyone care to do dishes??? Just kidding.

Election Fun

Infectious Laughter beat me to the punch on this one because I was just about to write about the election!
I'm not sure if everyone would know this about me, but I love elections. I love politics. I wouldn't want to be a politician, but I find politics fascinating. When 9pm came last night I was glued to the tv to see who would win.
For me the most interesting race was definitely Don Valley West - or the John Tory vs. Kathleen Wynne riding. That is my former riding. It's quite the riding. You have a huge mix of people because you have Flemingdon Park which is low income, high immigrant population and you also have Don Mills which is more affluent. And, any candidate who wants to win in that riding has to appeal to all sorts of people.
I have to admit I like John Tory. I don't agree with his entire platform, but I like him. However, he was running against one of my favourite politicians. The one great thing about living where we lived was Kathleen Wynne. Seriously. She was involved in the riding - all of it. She was big on creating programs as much for low income as higher income.
When you combine the fact that people really love her and that she high profile together with the fact that she's the education minister and John Tory handed her an election issue to run with I was really really curious how he would pull off the win. And he didn't.
I feel bad for him.
But, dude, pick a different riding.
As for our riding? I went Liberal. Why? Because I actually knew what the Liberal candidate stood for. I was pretty surprised that Conservative in our area got elected. But, either was a good choice for us, so I'm happy with it.
But, mostly I have to say I'm glad McGuinty won. What I liked about his campaign was that it wasn't all negative. I hate campaigns where candidates rely on attack ads to win an election. I truly believe that if your platform is good and if you stand for what you believe in that is enough. Of course you have to go into debates and display your opponents shortcomings. But, being positive is what it's about for me.
But, finally, I watched the speeches at the end. Of all of them, Howard Hampton's was my favourite. He was so sincere and appreciative of the people who helped him out. I loved when he pointed out a former teacher of his and thanked his family. When they did a shot of all the people in the room I was impressed. People were moved to tears. It wasn't about the correct political posturing for Hampton. It was about being a genuine person. And I was impressed. Not impressed enough that I'd want him to be the Premier, but still impressed.
And, I think we're coming up to a Federal Election soon ... I can't wait!

Sometimes ...

Sometimes people say things they don't mean.
I do it all the time. I want to say one thing, and it comes out wrong. Or, I want to convey a message and so I try to soften the blow by making it jokey.
Sometimes my messages aren't taken as they are intended.
And sometimes I take things the wrong way.
This happened to me a little more than a week ago. Someone made a comment about babies and weddings. And the topic of breastfeeding came into the mix. I took it the wrong way. I was really hurt by it. And that's okay. What wasn't okay was when I aired my complaints on my blog. Yes, it's my blog, and yes I can say what I want. But, by taking it to my blog instead of just confronting the person who hurt me I was wrong.
Sometimes a friendship weathers stuff.
Like hurt feelings and anger and a fight being brought to a public forum.
And sometimes friends realize that taking a couple minutes to clear the air and understand where the other was coming from solves a lot more problems than ruining a friendship. I'm not going to rehash the argument - that's not fair. I took the post down for a reason. But, I will say this, what I read into an e-mail about breastfeeding was not intended. Period.
Sometimes someone is just worth forgiving and forgetting an argument for - and I think we can both agree about that right now.

Thanksgiving Grace ... with a twist

Last night Matthew and I had dinner at my parents house. My aunt and uncle were also joining for dinner. I should mention that my uncle is a minister.
Anyway, as we normally do when we sat down for dinner we told Matthew it was time to say grace. We have a traditional poem/family grace that we all say - and Matt loves to say it.
So we sit down, bow our heads and as we all start with "Come our Jesus ..." Matthew shouts at the top of his lungs "Happy Birthday to You" and sings it all the way through.
Yes ... my child and his religious tendencies.
It was pretty hilarious.
My aunt and uncle have a really good sense of humour and didn't think anything of it. In fact, I think they were laughing as much or more than I was.
I'm telling you - this child loves being the centre of attention.

----

And, on the whole potty training front, Matt is now obsessed with changing his underwear. At least 2 or 3 times a day he takes his underwear off, brings it to me, and says he needs a clean pair. I explained to him the other day that we change underwear every day regardless of whether it looks dirty (i.e. not just when he has an accident). Now he wants to change it all the time.

Ahhhh ... Thanksgiving

This Thanksgiving has been great. Sure there have been a couple temper tantrums, a couple of emergency trips to the grocery store and a cat that has taken a liking to eating my toes ... but other than that it's been great.
Yesterday we had Thanksgiving with Mike's parents. They came in from Peterborough. Normally I make the Thanksgiving turkey, but since it's been a long 2 weeks, Mike decided to take on the task himself. And holy cow did he ever!
He chose the turkey. He did the potatoes. He made brocolli and cheese sauce. He even made his own gravy and cranberries!!!! I was truly amazed. I knew the man could cook, but I have to admit that I sort of doubted he could pull it all off.
In fact, I took Matthew out for the morning and Mike even cleaned the house. I came home to shiny floors and turkey in the oven.
Not only did I get out of cooking and cleaning, I even had a chance to sneak a nap in while Matt watched tv. It was wonderful. It almost made me want to be pregnant every Thanksgiving! (that is a joke - hear me - a joke!)
When my in-laws came over they brought dessert (pumpkin pie of course) and then after the meal the clean up was done while I watched Wheel of Fortune. Yes ... it was a good evening.
Today we decided to take it a little bit easy. We did a little cleaning and had some lunch. And then I realized something.
Today, for the first time in 3 months I haven't felt nauseous once. And, energy! It just suddenly came to me. Instead of wanting to have a nap Matt and I decided to go buy some Halloween decorations and make our home Halloweeny. What's going on??? It's fantastic. I missed my energy and my appetite.
Maybe I needed rest. Maybe my body is saying goodbye to the 1st trimester. Maybe Mike bought a magic turkey. Who knows. Who cares? Life is good.

So - Things are Good!

I went to my first ob appointment today. And thankfully everything is fine, normal even.
I have to admit that since last week I've been doubting everything. Sure I've been feeling like crap and trying to remind myself that morning sickness = pregnant and no more bleeding is a good thing, but when you're not at the baby kicking stage yet there's nothing to really gauge it by.

So, I was looking forward to today's appointment. And all was well.

Mike joined me because I didn't want to go to the first appointment on my own. There are reasons for this. First of all, last time I had a midwife, and there was just a little office we'd driven past. This is part of a hospital and there was an ultrasound to follow (and blood tests as it turned out) and I suck at directions. I would have been wandering for ages.

It was also nice to have him at the appointment.

So, here are some of the good things. One aspect I've been debating and discussed with my family doctor, was the c-section option. So I brought this up and my ob was totally on board. She said given the reasons (a dislocated tailbone for starters) that she is supportive. The only thing she asked is that I wait to make a decision on this until closer to the due date because my mind may change. She made it abundantly clear that I can make the decision anytime or change my mind anytime, but that she just wants me to decide based on this pregnancy. I thought that was awesome. It put my mind at ease - and I love that I have options. LOVE. She's pretty cool.

We also discussed my weight and my concerns. I have only gained 6 lbs, so she wasn't worried but she said that if I feel I'm gaining too much then she'll refer me to a dietitian. I like that idea.

And then we went for an ultrasound. It was a good experience. I have a healthy, growing baby and all the signs are normal. The neck size is fine, the arms and legs and head are there and the heart beat was 153 bpm. So normal. So wonderfully wonderfully normal. I feel like a weight has been lifted. I feel like I can actually trust now that things will be fine. I know I have to believe it, but I needed to hear that heartbeat again. It was a beautiful noise.

I'm NOT food!

Yesterday at daycare another little boy bit Matthew.
Matt was totally fine. And, I wasn't concerned in the least because Matthew has done his share of biting.
In the car on the way home I asked him about it. He told me who bit him and he showed me the teeth marks. When we went through the biting stage (and it recurs whenever he's upset about something) I was given lots of advice. Many people suggested biting him back. I never did. But, to me this was the perfect learning opportunity, and I explained that that is how we feel when he bites.
I think he understood.
Who knows.
But, then I was curious about his response.
Mike asked if he cried.
"Nope."
So, I asked him what he said.
"I told him 'I'M NOT FOOD' and then played with someone else."
Smart! I guess when you've bitten lots of kids you know exactly how to respond.
Of course, one of the things you could do is make an apology card. Right, Kerry? For all of you crafty people, or people who just like crafty things, you have to check out my friend Kerry's blog. Not only is she an incredibly lovely person but she is also amazing at making cards. Inspired much? Matthew cannot stop talking about her son "Wiley" (Riley). It's really cute.
For instance, "Mommy, we should tell Wiley that I'm riding a big boy bike now because he prolly does too." or "Mommy, can my webkinz be friends with Wiley's webkinz??"

-------------

And ...

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! At least all the Canadians.
Today I have my first ob appointment and an ultrasound, which I'm hoping is less stressful than last week! Wish me luck. I'm a little nervous about it.

DeLurk, my friends, DeLurk!

Who knew ... it's delurking day! I found out from Ali and MTM! (In other words, all the cool people knew about it!)
If you're reading, I'd love to know. Leave a comment :) I like to know you are out there. Feedback is great. And appreciated.
And, while I'm on the topic, to everyone who has been so super sensitive and kind and helpful this past week when I've been going through some crappy health ... THANKS! I haven't really been replying because I've been sleeping. But, you make a girl feel loved.
Seriously.
Thanks!

PS I keep meaning to post about how my son got the coolest gift of a webkin, and I'm fully addicted to the webkins site. Who knew "Go Fish" was soooo addictive.

Kamakazi Kitty

Let's take a break from my icky pregnancy complaints for a bit to discuss the craziest member of my household ... Rosie Rose Petal.
For those not in the know - that would be our 5 month old kitten.
I've had kittens before. I love kittens. But, I sware Rosie is the craziest of them all. Sweet, yes. But totally insane.
As she has gotten old she has gotten crazier.
One of the joys of our older house is that our doors don't shut completely. I mean, we can close the doors, but a gentle push will open them. Because I am allergic to cats, our compromise is that I can own cats but they can't sleep in our bedroom. This is fine by Mojo, our older cat. The closed door means she sleeps somewhere else. Given that Matt has 3 beds in his room alone this has never been a problem.
But Rosie??? When she wants something she wants it. So she somehow discovered that if she wants to get into our bedroom she just has to open the door.
The other day I was having a nap and I heard a thump. I kind of woke up. Then I heard another thump. Sixteen thumps later Rosie Rose Petal managed to open the door and flew into the bedroom. She then jumped on the bed, curled up and went to sleep. I picked her up and put her in the hall, closing the door behind me. Several thumps later she was back in the room, up on the bed and moments later curled up asleep. I decided not to fight this. What's the point? She is determined and would get in.
But her craziness continues throughout the house. Take for instance her drinking. We have a bowl of water out for her every day. Most cats lap water. Not Rosie. In goes the paw. She licks the water off her paw and then wipes her paw on the mat. This is repeated until she is full.
It's insane!!!
There is more. So much more.
But, despite the craziness we love her to pieces. She follows Matt around like a puppy dog, and the two of them play. When he pulls out his trains she chases them. If he plays in the basement she's always down there with him - sometimes playing. Sometimes relaxing.
I love it!!!

I am Woman; hear me, ummm, whimper?

Remember when I first announced my pregnancy, how I was so determined that nothing would change? That everything would be fine and as easy as with my first pregnancy?
Well, all of that changed.
And I'm holding on, but barely.
Thursday knocked me off my feet and scared me a lot. I got to work, and went to the washroom where I saw lots and lots of blood. My friend (and colleague) brought me to the hospital where I stayed off and on for a couple of days. The problem really was that they couldn't figure out why it happened. But, thankfully on the first day they heard a heartbeat. And then they sent me home late that afternoon saying that only time would tell and that I had to return the next day for an ultrasound - that would actually let us know if things were okay.
They were. In fact, the baby was moving so much that they couldn't get as much information as they wanted to. As the ultrasound technician explained, the info they needed which was that there was a heartbeat and "a single live fetus" was established. The fact that it is an acrobat is something for another technician to deal with.
I went from there to the early pregnancy clinic. The final decision was that they couldn't figure out what had happened, but I needed to take it easy. Really easy. No standing, no walking, no exercising and no picking up Matthew.
By Friday I was exhausted. And I had a cold. And I felt sick.
So, I spent the weekend doing nothing. Well, Matt and I had a failed trip to Shoppers Drug Mart where we had to have Mike come and pick us up.
My muscles hurt, my throat hurts, my head hurts. I'm nervous about hurting this baby.
And, I'm not going to whine my way through pregnancy. But still. ahhhhhh!
To everyone who asked, yes. I'm fine. As fine as I think I'm going to be. I desperately need to wax my eyebrows, get a hair cut and have a good cup of coffee, but all that aside, I think we're holding it together.
Mike and I are trying to change some things - I'm going to sleep in a little later and Mike is going to help get matt up. Little things - but things to make life survivable and make me less whiny.
Any other suggestions ... bring it on.

Thankful

I'm not ready to talk about the events of the past 2 days yet.
I haven't even had a chance to talk to my family about it, or digest how I'm feeling.
But, I'll leave it at this; I have never been so grateful to see the words, "single live fetus" written on a report, for a friend who dropped everything and held my hand through some scary moments, or colleagues who took charge of everything no questions asked.
And I realized that sometimes a lot more is spoken in the silences I share with my husband than we could ever discuss out loud.
I realized today that I probably have to give in to the fact that pregnancy can be a little difficult and I need to let people help me more than I do.
And, for some cheerful news check out the pictures of Haley's adorable new baby boy.

The Faith Schools Debate

For those of you who aren't in Ontario, on October 10th we're having a Provincial election.

I always vote. But, I don't always have a strong opinion on an issue. I usually have thought it through, but usually my vote is based on a number of issues along with the person running. For instance, if I really really like Howard Hampton I may vote NDP if I didn't majorly disagree with something. I've also been known to vote against someone I can't stand.

But, this election is confusing me - and it's all over the faith schools issue.

Let me fill you in briefly - the Conservative party wants to make faith schools part of the public system - and that involves about $500 million dollars going to these schools as long as they follow the Ontario curriculum. The Liberal party (their opposition) is standing firmly against this issue saying that public schools should represent the public and that all religions are welcome.

Here's the problem. I see both sides of the issue so very clearly that I'm not sure how to vote. I went to a "faith school" for 8 years. It was a wonderful experience. And, I am extremely grateful that I attended that school. However. It was a very strict Christian school. There were strictly enforced rules there that would never have been enforced in the public system. We said prayers, recited Bible verses and yes, learned creationism. And, the school also had the right to expel students if they were not living up to the standards or acting in a way that was inappropriate. In short, my Christian School education was very very different from the 6 years I spent in public school.

But, at the same time I'm choosing to send my son to public school. Why? First of all because I want him to have a public education. The school is by our home. I want him to experience growing up with kids from all faiths and backgrounds. I think that's the beauty of the public system. And, if I want him exposed to religion (which I do) I will bring him to church.

And, this is the thing - church is free. I mean, yes you are asked to tithe (just like in most religions, if you are a member of a congregation you give money to support the place), but if you want your child to get to know God you can send your child to Sunday School and not have to pay. To me, going to a faith based school is additional. I'm not sure why it should also be free.

More than that, I believe that we have created a public system for kids no matter their faith. And, the more money tax payers put into it the more resources we are going to have. To take $500 million out of the system is a lot of money - and I guess I'm worried that the resources are going away. I'm not sure how that will benefit people. And I worry that in the end we'll just pay more taxes to get these resources everywhere.

My other thought, and my big concern, is the issue of separating kids so much. Yes, I think there is a place for faith schools. And, yes, I think that parents should have the right to send kids to these schools. But, I think that if you open it up so much and announce that you're going to pay for kids to go to whatever faith school they want, you're going to segregate kids a whole lot more.

I'll be the first to admit that I knew nothing about the Muslim or Jewish faiths growing up. It amazes me and impresses me when Matthew comes home singing the Dreidel song or telling me about a new food he tried at daycare. I love that he's learning about different cultures and faiths at such a young age. And, living in a country that's so multicultural I'm not sure that I understand saying "okay, let's let our kids hang out with kids of only their faith." Across the Board - it's a scary notion.

But the thing is, I also don't think it's right to say that kids can only access faith based schools if they have the financial means. There are some grants, but certainly not enough. So, maybe it should be extended. I just don't know.

What I do know is that this should not be an issue to hang an election on. I realize that it would still be a vote in Parliament ... but still. If enough people are voted in it could get through.

I really disagree with some stuff the Liberals have done. I hate that right when we had no money we suddenly had to pay for eye exams. I hate that he said he wouldn't raise taxes and then he did. This certainly isn't a pro-Liberal blog.

I just think it's really scary to go down this path. I don't know.

And, the ironic thing is that I have all these questions for the politicians, and yet not one has come to our door to discuss it. Nor have I seen them at the GO station. I actually know someone working on the John Tory campaign. So, I think I'll send her this post and ask for her thoughts. I'm curious - is it just me, or is anyone really debating this issue?

PS Despite saying I disagree with McGuinty, I have to say that when I was a 1st year journalism school student I was at Queen's Park for radio class and I was taping a broadcast. I had no idea how to "plug in" and I was all alone. A really nice guy came and asked me if he could help. He actually showed me how to make it work and then helped me understand how the whole day would work, scrums, etc. I introduced myself at the end and he introduced himself. I remembered his name (Dalton McGuinty is pretty memorable) and a couple of weeks later I actually found out who he was. His kindness that day was really cool - and it was before there was any sort of election going on.

Let's Get Aquafit!

Today one of my friends told me that she was going to go to an Aquafit class this evening. I thought it sounded super fun - and it was all I could think about. So, I decided to look up classes in my area.

Amazingly there was a 7:30 pm drop in class about 10 minutes from my house. So, I called up a friend on a whim, and convinced her that we should go aquafitting!! Surprisingly she decided to join me and off we went to try out water aerobics.

I have to admit, I'd never done this before. The class was a workout, but more of a workout was getting my bathing suit on! I've gained about 9 lbs or so in the last 3 months, and I am most definitely showing. And, of all things to try to squeeze into a bathing suit is a tough choice. I tried on all my bathing suits, and after squeezing into first a speedo and then finally deciding on a tankini top over a one piece I realized that I didn't really need to attend the class because I had likely burned off just as many calories and doen just as many stretches. But, I was dressed, my friend was at the door, and off we went.

I have to admit, we were both a tad nervous. Fitness classes are always that way. The first class is the worst. But, by the time the class started we were already giggling and started to have a good time.

Now, I have to admit, I have often laughed at aquafit people. it's funny to watch. It's even funnier to attempt. Much like my failed bellydancing classes, aquafit takes some sort of ability to coordinate your arms and legs and wiggle in specific ways. The difference is that as long as you are hopping along and moving no one really can see that you have no clue what you're doing.

So, for 45 minutes my friend Amy and I puddled along in the water, did tons of exercises and had a blast. I honestly haven't laughed so hard in exercising, since, well, bellydancing!!! It was great. And it was low impact. And it was easy and hard and fun all at the same time. The 45 minutes flew by. When we started stretching I couldn't believe it was over. And it's totally pregnancy safe. And, it's so refreshing.

We're going back next week. I can't wait!

Differences, Date Night and Matthew's Makeover

When I was at the doctor last week she asked me if this pregnancy was any different than the last one. For some reason I said no, not really. And, she told me that's a very unusual response. That most women say how different each pregnancy is.
And, really, I've been wondering ever since what on earth I was thinking. I guess in the sense that I didn't go from no morning sickness to extreme morning sickness it's similar. But, in so many ways it's different. How? well for starters I know I'm pregnant. That's pretty big!!! And, in so many ways it's different. The foods I'm craving are healthy. I want to drink milk and v8 juice. And, I keep wanting elaborate salads (think Lettuce Eatery ... yum!) and my heartburn is kind of lurking but certainly not killing me and . and . and.
I have no idea what I was thinking!
Anyway ...
Call it a combination of not feeling great, being tired, and spending way too much time with Matthew, but by then end of the afternoon yesterday I was losing my mind!!! Matt was driving me nuts, and I was just generally pissed off with Mike for no reason other than that he was doing house stuff while I was out with a hyper child and wanted a nap. So I did something I don't do too often. I called my parents (from zellers where matt was climbing all the toys) and asked her to please take Matt for the evening before I went insane.
Luckily my parents were about 5 minutes away, and I think my mom heard the stress in my voice, and before I knew it they came and picked up Matthew.
And, instead of going home to bicker, I went home, got changed and Mike and I went for dinner at the Keg. It was fantastic!!!!
I love the Keg. And we had a gift certificate. Before dinner we sat in the bar. The bar tender made me the best virgin caesar (with tomato juice not clamato blech) and we just sat like civilized people. Dinner was soooo good. The funny part was that we ordered the same kind of steak and they switched them. And, then I asked the waiter if they were confused (because it's hard to tell the difference between medium and medium rare) and he said they had. So, we thought it was pretty funny and who cares, so we just switched our steaks around. Long story short, we ordered dessert and he gave it to us for free. So unnecessary, but it made our dinner extra yummy!!!!
When we got back to my parents' place I was a lot more relaxed and Matt loved hanging out with Grandma and Grandpa who even took him to the playground. Good times!!!!
And, then today we went and got Matt a new hairstyle. He's officially graduated from toddler to kid. And ... he requested spikes!!! But, "not hard spikes like a dinosaur but soft boy spikes made of hair."
Matthew before - a little preppy and a little long

After - Matthew sporting the "not hard spikes like a dinosaur but soft boy spikes made of hair" look.

A Little OCD????

Today I went to pick up Matthew from daycare. I'd stayed home from work because I wasn't feeling great, and by 4:30 I was ready to have some company.
Because I was a little earlier than usual the supervisor was there. I was asking her about Matthew, how he's doing, etc. She mentioned to me that she's slightly concerned about some of Matt's behaviours. In particular about his obsessive nature.
It's not new to us. We've always joked that he's a little OCD. Except it's not terribly funny when it's not so much a joke as it is something being brought to your attention.
I know basically nothing about this. I always thought OCD was just washing your hands a lot. Matt just tends to be completely anal about lining stuff up. Like, if he has his cars out he wants them in a straight line. Or if he's playing with his trains he will get completely frustrated with trying to get them all on the track. And he will visualize a track and completely freak out when it's not working. But, I guess unlike some kids he doesn't let it go. A lot of kids will get mad and walk away. He'll either figure it out or have a meltdown.
I guess this has happened a lot at daycare lately. He wants toys to be very specific or he has a complete meltdown.
I'm thinking this is normal. I'm also thinking that I'm glad that my beloved doctor happens to be his doctor (even though I'm going to switch to someone local for Matt) because I know if I ask her she will likely tell me that this is not something to worry about.
I asked what they are doing when he has a meltdown. And, we both had to laugh because she told me they have been doing breathing exercises. Apparently the latest thing that they are doing in their training is learning deep breathing techniques and when one child has a meltdown they lead the class (or the group or just the child) in some deep breathing exercises.
I had to ask how it was going.
"Oh - they look at me like I'm crazy" she explained, adding that she did feel a little crazy. No doubt! I happen to believe that breathing exercises are effective, but I'm not trying to lead 15 preschoolers in breathing exercises.
So, to review ... my child may have some sort of obsessive compulsive issue and to resolve it we are breathing through it.
Oookay.
For now we'll go with it. I mean, why not? Ommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Just to be clear - I have done some basic internet research on OCD and ADD and ADHD. I don't think it's any of those. None of them remotely match what we're talking about. And, she didn't actually say OCD. It's more just some sort of obsession thing. Still - it's the thought of going through testing that worries me.