Friday, November 17, 2006

Potty Time & Gum - Bad Mommy!

Edited at the Bottom!In case you want to know the outcome
Friday morning.
Our household is cranky. It's rainy and icky. And, really, all I want to do is have a quiet morning, get out the door on good time, and hurry up with the day.
Matty had other plans. He chose today to denounce the use of diapers in our house.
After his morning potty session (we're really good about getting him out of bed and plopping him on the potty), he was okay getting dressed except for the diaper part.
"No Mommy. No diaper."
Ummmmmm. What? This is a child who would be happiest if he could run around all day in a diaper and nothing else. And now, suddenly, he wants underwear.
Of course we had some. So, on when the Bob underpants. And Matty was so happy.
I figured that what I would do is just pack a ton of underwear (like all 5 pairs that he owns), a bunch of diapers, a bunch of clothes and send him to daycare.
I'm not really thinking okay, you guys have 2 weeks till we move - toilet trian. But, let's be honest ... It would be nice!!!
So, I wrote a long note to his (somewhat strong-willed) teacher about my reasoning and off we went. My assumption was that the easy going usual morning teacher would be in, and she would say, sure, whatever. And that would be that.
But, NO! His regular, strong-willed-say-what's-on-her-mind was in. And, she basically flipped out when I told he was in underwear.
Yes, I calmly said. He has chosen to wear underwear today and we went with it. He's used the potty this morning. I've packed lots of extra stuff. We're good.
She wasn't too happy. I guess we hadn't talked about it. And I did kind of spring it on her. But, I also made it really clear that if she wanted to put his diaper on right then and there that was totally fine. My point was just that he asked for underwear and I was encouraging it.
I'm a big believer in the idea that kids hit milestones when they are ready. And, if it's time to give up diapers ... bring it on!
We left. She was snippy. It was a weird morning.
Oh, and before we left she noticed that Matthew was, shocker, chewing gum.
She pointed out that he is NOT allowed to chew gum, and that it is very dangerous and made him spit it out. Apparently gum is not allowed at daycare.
Honestly, on the weekend, when we were at Walmart, I let him put a quarter in the chiclets gum machine, and he was enamored by it. I taught him to chew gum not swallow it. And it was pretty darn cute to me. I didn't realize he had saved some of it in his car seat for a day like today.
Anyway, instead of just fessing up to the whole thing I said to the teacher. "I'm sorry. I didn't give it to him. He found it."
Oops. Mike just looked at me. I guess it sounded like he had taken it from the bottom of a desk or something.
It just kept getting worse and worse. So, not only was I the worst mommy in the world for the diaper thing. I let my kid chew found gum. And, then to top it all off I asked for a hug goodbye and he said "wait a minute" to which she said "that's not how you talk to mommy!"
It's no wonder motherhood stresses me out.
Pass me a drink. I need it this morning. This mothering this is tough.
It's a good thing that I didn't mention to her that last night he begged me to stop at Tim Hortons for a sprinkle donut and chocolate milk (which I did) and he then ate the entire donut, got home, sat and watched cars and ate cheese strings, and then we called it a night. No balanced dinner, no reading before bedtime. Just donuts, cheese and a movie.
I call that fun.
Some people would call that bad parenting.
I honestly just think we all need a vacation.

So I went to get Matthew at the end of the day. He was back in diapers. They actually did try to bring him to the potty several times, but he decided he wanted diapers. I came home with a bag full of wet clothes (including shoes).
I had a lengthy chat with Doug, the male teacher. He told me that he thinks Matt is waffling a bit. He said that all week his diaper has been dry all day - and that today it was wet at every change. So, I asked if he thought that was weird. He said that no, it means that he's making a point that he will toilet train in his own time. He said that the good news is that a child who can control like that is actually ready for Toilet Training. He said that most kids like this can literally train overnight when they are ready.
So, I'm sticking with not pushing this till we move (and after Christmas). I think. Or maybe we will tell him Santa won't come unless he uses the potty. I'M KIDDING! I'm only a kind of bad mommy. I'm not that mean!
Besides, we are currently using Santa in way too many other bribes. Like, we can't buy toys or Santa will be sad. You can't have a meltdown or Santa will be sad. And, blissfully, we have taken a break from Raffi to listen to "Santa Music." Anyway, that had nothing to do with potty training now did it???


Anonymous said...

Sometimes, survival is more important than perfection.

If you were to itemize everything our daughter ate last night and ordered them proportionately, it would go something like this:
pretzels with peanut butter
tortilla chips

Ultimately, they will get what they need.

And damn, if you're posting this at 5:30am, what time do you drop your kid off at daycare?!?

Ruthie said...

He sounds like he's on the verge of toilet readiness... boy, that's something I'm dreading.

Mine hoards his food too. I find bits of cheese and half-eaten crackers tucked into the folds of his car seat, or stuffed into his pockets or (sometimes) in his diaper. A lot of times I catch him munching on something when I haven't given him a snack to eat-- he just saved food for later in his diaper.

Oh well. It happens. You're a good mommy just the same.

Kristine said...

Ain't parenting grand? I have to say that I am a bit worried my son turned 3 in Sept, and no potty yet. I talk about the potty, and he says no.

I know that he won't go to high school in diapers, as many have told me, but I always worry if there is something I am not doing.

Ruthie.... Food in the diaper? How funny... My 1 year old periodically will be chewing, and I have not given her anything. I do not know where her stash is, but I basically root around her mouth to make sure the contents are something edible... and then if they are... well... she chows.

As far as daycare, who is paying who here? I am sick of feeling tense when I ask for special considerations... we are paying for them to be there.

Laural Dawn said...

I probably over exaggerated a little bit when I was talking about the teacher - I get that it was a Friday morning, and that it was probably the last thing she wanted.
But ...
It's your job. Just like I don't like it when on Friday my boss gives me some crazy job. Suck it up!