and then ...

so after weeks of feeling blissy ... i guess there is a crash
and then ...
you question your work
you feel like your efforts won't cut it
you eat junk
and you feel like you made 3 steps forward and 3 giant leaps back.

or you do everything you can to be a friend, and throw your whole freaking heart into something you think is special ... and you are very clearly told you shouldn't have.

and then what?

last year when i was losing weight I made a conscious choice that was awesome. my choice was that i wasn't just going to lose weight - eat healthy - weigh myself every week. My choice was that whether my weight went up or down, whether i had a good week or a bad week, i'd pick myself up, dust myself off, and keep going.

And, hey. it worked. because i learned that a bad minute, hour, day or week didn't mean failure. it meant an opportunity to get up. regroup. and do better.

right now that's where i'm at.

I've done so well on this whole yoga, bliss, positivity thing. I've been cheerful and truly happy. today i lost it. it's hard because i didn't make a plan to be happier, it just started happening. so i didn't have a fall back for a bad day.

My plan? get my ass on the mat. Breathe in. breathe out. And start over.

I'm counting the days till music yoga. until then i figure everything will work out.

(I'm just trying so hard)